Chapter 17 He Won’t
"Foolish—," he called out.
As Zheng Congyuan began to speak, he suddenly caught sight of the tears in her eyes and stopped abruptly, a fleeting emotion stirring within his chest. He wanted to say something, but nothing seemed right.
"Nian Ru, I hope you are truly happy," Zheng Congyuan reached out, wanting to wipe the tears from the girl's face. His hand halted mid-air and did not retract, Zheng Nianru firmly grasped the hand that Zheng Congyuan never had the courage to extend in their previous life.
"I am only happy when I see you," Zheng Nianru insisted stubbornly, her family, the Zheng Imperial Family, the common dawn people— in her previous life all these had mattered more to him, things he cared about and refused to let go. Thus, she hated it to her core and conspired to rebel, wanting to see him free from those hesitations, free from those burdens of moral obligations.
Yet, Zheng Nianru knew that she had a place in his heart. Being the Crown Prince, he hadn't married despite being over twenty, nor had there ever been any woman unduly close to him. Even after she repeatedly sabotaged his marriage arrangement with the Crown Princess Consort Ximen Yuyan, he had never truly punished her.
Thus, he must have felt for her. In her previous life, she had never asked, and would this life be just as blurred with no definite answer?
Yes, she wanted an answer as compensation for the past life.
Her sleeve was slightly tugged back as Zheng Nianru held on, clenched in her hand.
"Brother Crown Prince, do you not want to see me?" Zheng Nianru gazed at him with hurtful eyes, the blush wet with tears, like a sprite lost in the woods, a deer without guidance.
Zheng Congyuan thought of his servants acting on their own, thought of the words she must have heard in his absence. That was why she hesitated, that was why she felt so aggrieved.
"I didn't know seeing you would annoy you. If that is truly the case, I shall forever..." the girl's lips trembled, her grievances almost taking a tangible, clear form, silently accusing the one before her, pricking at the conscience, her face too innocent to doubt.