Isekai Hero Bartender

I got a later start than expected. Wynnie and I had been, shall we say, thorough in exploring each other’s bodies. And after the first round, she kept telling me to imagine that Shivai was watching.

Which made errands just slightly awkward for me. The first one I ran required an extra set of hands, and Wynnie’s were busy.

"So what's the deal here? You just wanted me to come along for moral support?" Shivai asked apprehensively, following a step or two behind me the whole way down the road. "Or did you want me to make sure we got an extra, extra good price?"

"You mean charm him out of a few copper?"

She shrugged. "Just trying to earn my keep. You know I'd do pretty much anything you asked me to." She paused. "Yeah, I think I would, actually. Pretty much anything."

I was sore and already a bit sweaty, but it’d been worth it. Wynnie’s cries of pleasure still echoed in my mind.

Unfortunately, now it was late morning, and the sun was already warm on the back of my neck. As far as I knew, this world didn't have any sunscreen. People just raw-dogged UV rays until they turned bright red or toughened up.

The breeze blew less steadily than usual, too. If this was the beginning of the heat wave, then it was ramping up nice and steady. Within a day or two, we’d be cooked.

The two of us were strolling down the road toward Farmer Cal's barn. He lived on the outskirts to the south, nestled in a wide, flat valley between two hills. I'd never been there, but Wynnie assured me he was a kind fellow who typically welcomed visitors as though they were family.

Shivai’s overt offer still resonated. It sat funny in my head.

"What makes you say that? The anything I asked thing?"

"What? Is it weird?"

"A little, yeah. Plus the kiss without warning last night. It makes it seem like you're just trying to flirt with me to win me over."

"Is it working?" She batted her eyelashes.

I chuckled. "A little, but maybe not as much as you'd like. If I'm being honest, it makes me kind of uneasy."

"Why is that?"

I took a deep breath. How could I explain? I didn't like feeling manipulated. I also didn't like the way it made me worry about what Wynnie felt. Even if Wynnie had seemed weirdly encouraging.

Most of all… "I just get the idea that it's unfounded. Like you're just, I don't know, throwing yourself at me for no reason. I haven’t really done anything for you."

She pursed her lips, nodding silently to herself. Absently, she kicked a small rock and sent it skittering down the dirt road as we turned off toward the farmer's house. It stretched in front of us, a comfortable pasture with a dilapidated wooden fence around it. Dotted among the acreage, various cows, sheep, and goats ruminated lazily.

"I'm sorry. I've always been a bit forward."

"It's cool. I just didn't know if you were being serious or playful."

"Can't it be both?” An apologetic smile crossed her lips. “But to your point, yes, I understand where you're coming from. I could tell you my side if you'd like."

"I'm sure it would help. Don't get me wrong, I think you're gorgeous and we have a lot of fun flirting together, so that’s nice. But just because Wynnie said she's okay with me potentially seeing other people doesn't mean I want to do it just to do it."

She scratched her jaw thoughtfully. "She said that, did she? Well, it's only fair for me to tell you why I’m being, erm, aggressive. Yes, I think you're handsome. You have what we call in these parts a father's body. I really like that. But it's more than just looks."

I chuckled. "I'd hope so."

"You gave me a chance when you didn't have to. You took a big risk. And you did the same with Wynnie and her inn. And you took a big risk taking on those pirates, too. I just see you taking all these chances to do right by people. That's an admirable quality, you know?"

Suddenly, my neck felt the tingle of sweat. It itched, feeling oddly stuffy without the usual cool breeze. I put two fingers underneath my collar to tug it loose, then realized the buttons were already undone down to my sternum.

If Shivai noticed my awkwardness, she didn't say anything. She was doing that thing where she chewed on her lip with one sharp canine. A hint of rouge danced across the upper part of her cheeks and spread over her nose as she averted her gaze.

Her tail flicked side to side behind her, quick, then paused in a curly queue before building momentum and flicking back again.

"Well, you could at least say something. The silence makes it all awkward."

"Sorry," I apologized. "I never got too good at taking compliments."

"Really? But people probably compliment your cocktails all the time."

"Ha, yeah." I rubbed the back of my neck with my hand before letting it swing back freely by my side. "That's not really complimenting me, though. My cocktails can handle praise much better than I can."

She fixed me with a brave stare—one I couldn't look away from for some reason. It wasn't her charm. Rather, it was just the look of earnestness hidden beyond the usual façade of rogueish bravado.

"You should get better at accepting kindness. You're great at giving it. And good people like you deserve to know how others feel about them."

"Well, thank you. I appreciate it. And I appreciate you telling me a bit more about why you're so… um…"

"Bonkers slutty? Freakishly horny? Hot for human?"

"I was going to go with aggressive, but it sounds like we have a few options."

The path diverged. To our left, it broadened, fanning out into a muddy, dirty area, sort of like a driveway leading up to a barn. On our right, a narrower footpath led toward a farmhouse. We paused at the intersection, looking around for a clue as to which direction to go.

The barn door was open, and I could see some of the shady interior. It looked like horse stalls, piles of hay or some kind of grain, and various and sundry farm equipment. To be honest, I couldn't recognize most of it. I may have been from a smaller town, but it wasn't rural. Agricultural knickknacks and thingamabobs were far outside of my wheelhouse.

From inside, I caught a dull but steady flash of movement. Something made a sound like a cow makes.

Probably a cow, I realized.

"Should we check in there?" I jerked my thumb toward the barn. "I think I heard something."

"Why not?"

Shivai skipped a step as she followed along behind me. Our unsure footsteps crunched up to the wide-open door. There, the scene became clearer.

A middle-aged farmer sat on a stool beside a dairy cow. His weathered hands worked her swollen udder with careful precision, splashing out thin, white jets of creamy milk into a pail. The liquid splashed rhythmically.

The cow looked at us dolorously, as though unhappy to be observed in such a state but resigned to it. The man looked up from under the brim of his straw hat. He chewed lazily at a straw of wheat.

"Well, hello there." He sat up straight and stopped milking. "I don't believe I've had the pleasure. I'm Farmer Cal. What brings you around?"

"I'm Drew. This is Shivai. I work with Wynnie at the Breakwater Inn."

His eyes lit up with a spark of recognition, and he scratched his salt-and-pepper beard. Slowly, as if favoring a set of aging knees, he stood to his full height.

"Ah, yes. I've heard about you. The Reborn, right?"

"See? Rumors," Shivai said.

"Yeah, yeah," I muttered. I stepped forward and held out my hand to greet Cal. "We're looking for cream, if you've got it."

He chuckled. "Does she need it for her coffee? That young sprite always did have a taste for those odd, bitter beans the traders bring up from the coast."

"Actually, we're going to make a confection with it."

"Well! She deserves a treat. Whatever it is, it sounds rich. Perhaps ‌whipped cream as icing or garnish? A bread pudding? Oh, oh, or perhaps a custard!"

I chuckled. The man certainly loved his desserts. Too bad for him, he'd probably never had anything like what we were going to make.

Fortunately, we could rectify that in relatively short order.

"We’re making a recipe from my home. It's called ice cream. It's sweet, cold, and utterly delicious." Then, because I barely knew how to make it, but wanted to give him something he’d understand, "It starts with a custard, actually. But we freeze it."

"Frozen custard, you say? Sounds dubious, but I suppose it doesn't matter what you do with the cream after I sell it to you."

With the farmer, a bit of haggling went a long way. The inn had been flush with coin since our glow-up. I would've taken him at his quoted value if he hadn't gotten there by doing his mental math out loud. When he ran the numbers, I realized he was simply multiplying the base unit cost without applying a bulk discount.

My college degree was relatively useless, but I knew enough about commerce and unit economics to understand how restaurant sourcing worked. You buy in bulk, you pay less. Them’s the rules.

Fortunately, he didn't argue at all.

He just shrugged. "You got me there. What would you like to pay for the lot?"

I threw out a number that seemed fair, and he nodded, satisfied.

Before we left, he caught our attention one last time. "Suppose I could cut you a better deal next time, on one condition."

"What's that?" I asked.

"Say I bring the wife and kids by. If we try your custard confection and like it, maybe we can cut each other some better discounts. What do you say?"

I grinned. "I'd say that's a mighty fine deal. A pleasure doing business with you."

"And a pleasure doing business with you, too.” He switched the straw of grain to the other side of his mouth thoughtfully. “Say, you and your pretty girlfriend here should join us for dinner sometime. We don't get many guests this far out of town."

"Oh, Shivai's not my—"

"We'd love to!" Shivai butted in. "Could we bring Wynnie, too?"

Farmer Cal removed his hat, scratched his balding head, and plopped it back on, clearly thinking it through. His jaw worked curiously. After several seconds, he shrugged.

"Now, I’m not saying no, mind you. But I was just thinking it might be nice to have a simple double date. Not so much a whole dinner party. The missus and I don't get out so much, you see."

"Great! It's a date!"

“We’ll send word and arrange a time. Let us know if it’s two or three. We might need an extra bottle.”

Shivai's tail whipped possessively around my arm, yanking me slightly to follow her back down the path. Both of her hands were full, now carrying small, covered pails of fresh cream.

My balance teetered as she pulled me along. The heavy buckets of liquid sloshed in my grip. Already, my shoulders felt the strain. They'd be aching and sore by the time we returned to the Breakwater Inn.

Lady Talia would be thrilled, no doubt. She'd probably frame it as more training.

"A dinner date! That should be fun, right?" Shivai bobbed excitedly alongside me. Her wide, innocent grin didn't even look mischievous or impish—just excited and hopeful. "And a real one, too! The knife thingy will be fun, but, well… I've just never been on an actual date before."

part of me wanted to remind her that it only counted as a date if both of us agreed. Yet I didn’t get that far. Not only did I want to give her the win, but I had to admit, I did want to count them as dates.

More importantly though, something else had caught my attention. Something confusing and surprising.

"You've never been on a date?"

"Nope!"

"Not a single one?"

She shot me a glance that clearly questioned my intelligence. "…Nope."

"But you're a succubus?"

"Is that so hard to believe?"

"We don't have succubi where I'm from," I explained, realizing I could get myself in hot water quickly. "They're part of our mythical lore, but they sort of, um," I could feel sweat spring to my brow. "How do I put this? They're like sex-starved devils who suck the souls out of unsuspecting men through sexual congress."

She looked at me, eyes wide in shock. Her mouth hung slightly open, dumb. She blinked several times.

Once again, I felt itchy around my collar. Maybe the heat wave was coming on faster than I thought. I felt stupid. Why did I say that? Why did—

She burst out in a peal of melodic laughter. "Ha ha ha! That is the craziest thing I've ever heard, and I once listened to a troop of cloistered sewer cultists preaching in the streets about how the world is flat."

So, they had those here, too, huh?

We returned to the main road, both still laughing a little. Although if I was being honest, I still didn't quite know what I was laughing about. I was no wiser to succubi now than I was a minute ago.

She shook her head, muttering little phrases to herself at my expense. I caught, "stealing souls," and, "sexual congress."

Finally, unable to take her ribbing much longer, I broke down. "Care to enlighten me a bit more about succubi, then?"

"Not really."

"Why not?"

"Because sometimes a lady likes to cultivate mystery. I'm trying to get you to notice me, Drew. You might think my feelings developed too fast, but, uh.”

“Succubus thing?”

She ducked her head to hide the darkening purple of her cheeks. “Lucky guess. Anyway, I just really, really, really want you to be interested in me."

Rarely in my life had I ever met someone so earnest and open about their feelings. Every young man’s dream was to meet a woman so direct. Memories flooded of every time I’d failed to see the subtle signs from a girl I liked. Dozens of missed opportunities. In retrospect, they all seemed so obvious.

There was no risk of that happening with Shivai. She was leaving everything on the table.

Even now, she soldiered on.

"And don’t worry. I'm not trying to steal you away from Wynnie. You two have something beautiful, and I want to see it thrive. It’s just, I’ve had so little for so long, you know? It would mean the world to me if I could have just a small piece of that for myself. Even if I get scraps. I’ve survived off of less."

I gulped. There was no playful light behind her eyes. No anxious twitching of her tail. No sultry licking of her lips.

Her voice had dropped a register, husky and sonorous. The expression she wore was all plaintive and meaningful.

“Shivai?”

"I know I have my work cut out for me. But I'm going to try, okay? And if I have to be a little mysterious to get you to think about me, then that's exactly what I'll do."

Only the dull rustle of roadside grasses filled the silence then. She looked down, lips pursed, blushing.

"Shivai."

She looked away, unable to meet my gaze.

"Shivai."

"Come on. My shoulders are starting to get sore. Ugh. Fuck. I shouldn't have said anything. I'm so stupid."

She picked up speed, rushing now back toward the inn as the seaport started to come into view.

"Shivai, wait."

Speaking loud enough for me to hear her several paces ahead, she kept going. "That's one thing you should know about succubi, Drew. Sometimes, when we feel something, we can't hold it in. And now I'm mortified. So please, can we please just go home?"