I Hate Dungeon School

I blearily opened my eyes, noting the lack of warmth enveloping me. I felt a groan escape my mouth as I sat up, feeling all of my muscles aching in new and inventive ways.

I looked around, rubbing my eyes. I spotted Eira and others finishing their packing. What time was it? It was awfully bright.

"Did you all let me sleep in?" I grumbled, trying my best to shake off the remnants of drowsiness.

"Yeah, Andritch said we should let you sleep a bit after everything that happened yesterday. Trip down the mountain should be easier, so we've got some time." Cori answered my question first.

"As much as we'd love to let you get some more rest, your highness, we do have a schedule to keep." Mariana piped up. She was trying to sound like her usual sarcastic self, but even half awake, I could tell the usual bite wasn't in it.

It suddenly occurred to me that two of my party were missing. Myth and Smitty. Smitty, I could understand. She was home and wanted to spend time with her family. Or was making breakfast, judging by the smell in the air.

"Where's Myth?" I asked, finally pulling myself into a standing position.

"Girl wasn't handling yesterday terribly well, so she's hitting the last dose of her herbs before we head deeper into Burgotova," Cori explained with a sigh.

"How did she get those past the guard station?" I asked, legitimately confused. The particular herbs Myth used to sedate her anxiety were illegal in Burgotova. Illegal in many places, but Burgotovan law was particularly strict about it.

"She's been doing this a while. She's probably got more tricks than you'd think." Cori shrugged and got back to packing.

After I pulled my clothes on, I gave Eira a quick kiss on the cheek.

"I'm going to go check on Myth. She's not the best at handling stuff like this." I said gently.

"I'm shocked you're handling this at all, to be honest." Eira's worry was clear as day in her voice.

"I'm saving the mental breakdown for later. Closer to sandwiches." I gave her a wink and another kiss before heading out.

Finding Myth wasn't hard. Her herbs, which one of these days I'd have to find out if they had a name so I wouldn't just be calling them 'herbs', had a particularly pungent aroma that I absolutely detested.

Just had to follow my nose to find the blitzed out anxiety wizard.

She was leaning back behind a shed, just puffing away at her little pipe. Staring off into the distance, eyes glazed and unfocused. She was bundled up pretty heavily, which didn't surprise me. She was a slender thing, and slenderness does not get along well with the cold.

Her usual blissful smile wasn't there, just a soft, tired grimace. It was the look I had seen before, in the faces of the retired adventurers who came to the maid cafe, not for the pretty girls but for the strongest booze we carried. Her look wasn't as pronounced as theirs, but I could still see it forming.

"Copper for your thoughts?" I said suddenly. She didn't even answer at first. Just took another long drag of her pipe, held her breath, and then released a cloud of vapor and smoke into the mountain air.

"Just a copper, huh? That feels about right." She sighed, tapping the ash out of her pipe before tucking it away. Usuall,y when she smoked her herbs, she had a goofy smile on her face.

Now it was the most contemplative frown I had ever seen on her face. I leaned against the shed next to her and just let the silence fill the air around us. I figured she'd talk when she was ready.

"You died. You fucking died. Heart stopped and everything. I could feel it. It started back up, thank all the gods, but you were straight up dead!" Her voice quavered, and tears formed in her eyes, and they froze as they slid down her cheeks.

"It's a part of the business, Myth. Folks make mistakes, run into bad luck, a million things. That's why we're going to Dungeon School. To cut down on the likelihood of us dying, but the risk never goes away. We just have to get used to it." I tried my best comforting tone. I wasn't the best at it, but I wanted to try for her sake.

She annoyed me, I hated the smell of her herbs, but she was a friend, an ally, and we'd been together since we started at Dungeon School.

"I don't want to get used to it! I thought that after my sister died, I'd be stronger, I'd get used to it or something, but it hurts, and it scares me, and it fucking sucks! I hate it! HATE IT!" The tears were flowing freely. Not just tears of sadness, but mixed with the salty sting of rage and fear.

I couldn't think of any words, so I just pulled her into an embrace. She was a bit taller than me though, so her tears kept freezing to my hair.

"It's ok, Myth! We all survived this. We can survive anything. We'll get through this." I said as I patted her back gently.

She sniffed a few times before slipping from my grip on her.

"Thanks, Alta. It felt good to let that out. I've got a lot to think about, though. Let's just... let's just get this trip over with, ok." She sighed again. I could tell she wasn't really better, but it also wasn't my place to pry.

We returned to the group, and Smitty rushed us inside to eat breakfast.

--

After we were fully fed, packed, and ready to go, we said our goodbyes to the village as they came to see us off. Except Auntie. She said she didn't care what a bunch of elves and humans did.

"Are you sure you don't want to come with us, Smitty? We could always use you if things get ugly." I said, giving the furry mountain that was our kobold defender a big hug.

"Am sure, friend Alta, yes yes. Burgotova not kind to kobolds, do not want to cause more problem than nec-ness-needed." She stumbled over some of her words.

"We'll stop by and pick you up on the way back, ok?" Helena said while she finished lashing the last pack to the Ptarms. The birds looked happy and well rested, which was a good sign for the journey.

"Yes Yes Teacher Andritch! Will be good to spend time with pups and mate!" She turned to us and looked very serious for a moment. "No more dying, friend Alta. Is not allowed. Come back safely, do not burn down city, do not make pups. Understood."

She put her paws on her hips and huffed. I wanted to giggle but I could tell she was serious. We all promised to be on our best behavior for the wedding. As best as we could be, all things considered.

We waved as the village disappeared into the thick winter forest. It had been a rough visit, to be sure, but I think I was going to miss this little kobold village. They're all adorable, and the food was good. A nice change from the ever-present winter stews of Revenstahd. I couldn't help but sigh wistfully, deeply dreading the coming days.

My thoughts turned from that depressing route and focused on the return trip. It was true, descending the mountain was faster, but challenging in its own way. I lost track of how many times I slipped and slid down a snowbank. Thankfully, Eira was there to help me regain my footing.

With the help of a pair of Kobold guides, we quickly found ourselves back at the place where we had hidden our wagon. Thank all the gods above and below, no one had stolen it. Or even found it at all. There were some signs of other travelers as we made it to the main road, which struck me as curious given how locked down the border was right now.

"We might run into other travelers, though I've no idea whom." I pointed it out to Helena. She shrugged.

"A problem for later. It's best to always expect ambushes and bandits on trips like this anyway. Along with monsters. Honestly, paranoia is the best thing you can pack for trips like this." She said as she hitched the fluffy white Ptarms to the wagon while they cooed.

We piled our things inside and reactivated the fire crystal, grateful for the warmth. Especially for warmth that didn't smell of smoke. It felt like it was going to take forever to get the smell of burnt tree off of me, bath or no.

As we nestled in, passing around bits of food, Helena said something in dwarvish to the Ptarms, and we began rolling forward headlong into the part of the trip I truly dreaded. The wedding.