Chapter 50: CEO of Calamity
Mizukume’s clone body began to glitch and distort like a broken signal as she finished speaking. It dissolved into a shower of pale blue light particles that swirled violently in the center of the room with a sound like shattering glass.
A new form solidified from the swirling vortex. It was still the hauntingly beautiful, pale-faced schoolgirl, but the energy was entirely different. This form was denser, radiating an ancient menace that set the air trembling. It was a chosen manifestation.
“This is much more comfortable,” the entity said. Her voice was now a clear, chilling bell, devoid of Mizukume’s forced casualness. She smoothed the folds of her dark, traditional school uniform. “You will call me Kayo.”
“Kayo?” Su Yao repeated. Her guard remained impossibly high.
“A name I rather enjoyed during my time in India,” she said. A distant, cruel smile touched her lips. “It suited the aesthetics of the Kali Yuga. So much simpler than the endless debates over Da Ji or Tamamo. Kayo is clean and modern. It’s the name you will use.”
Su Yao’s jaw tightened. Of course.
India was the land of the Asura King Vritra, a being the museum deemed a ‘Calamity’. A being on Taisui Xingjun’s level.
She’s tired of being ranked a Dragon-level threat, Su Yao realized, the chill in the air deepening. This new name was her application for a higher pay grade. It was self-promotion.
Kayo looked directly at Su Yao. Her gaze held the weight of collapsed empires. “Now, cousin. The Li family tomb awaits. I'm curious to see what trinkets my would-be nephew-by-marriage left behind.”
Su Yao eyed Kayo with a mix of suspicion and exasperation. “If you're really Da Ji, shouldn't you be off fulfilling some grand, destructive purpose? I recall you had duties to Nuwa. Or has that changed too?”
Kayo waved a hand dismissively. “Please, cousin. My role as a destroyer of dynasties is a relic of a bygone era. Humans no longer require my talents. They manage chaos and collapse far more efficiently on their own these days.”
Her expression was one of bored amusement. “With their endless wars, environmental degradation, and social media frenzies, they've made my life’s work obsolete. I've been effectively laid off.”
A theatrical sigh escaped her. “It’s quite the irony, isn't it? Humans complain about automation and AI stealing their jobs a lot. But here I am, a primordial force of ruin, made redundant by humanity itself.”
She leaned against a nearby console as if burdened by the weight of modern progress. “They took my job! Now, I'm free to pursue personal interests like helping you solve this delightful mystery. Consider it a family favor.”
Su Yao pinched the bridge of her nose, feeling a headache coming on. “So you're jobless and bored, and that’s why you've latched onto me?”
“Precisely!” Kayo beamed. Her eyes glinted with mischief. “What could be more entertaining than aiding my dear cousin in hunting down her long-lost almost-lover?”
“Then make yourself useful,” Su Yao shot back, gesturing at the terminal. “This data gives a schematic and spiritual analysis, but the actual geographical location of the Li ancestral tomb is classified or missing. You've been around for millennia. Where is it?”
Kayo’s smug expression faltered for a fraction of a second. She tilted her head. A flicker of genuine confusion crossed her features. “The location?”
“Yes. The physical coordinates. Where is the tomb buried?”
Kayo straightened up, adopting a haughty posture. “A trivial detail. The great tombs of significant bloodlines are always hidden through powerful geomancy and illusion arrays. Their locations shift with the dragon veins. It’s beneath me to keep track of such, mundane addresses.”
Su Yao stared at her, deadpan. “You don't know, do you?”
“Of course I know!” Kayo insisted, but her voice lacked its usual conviction. She looked away, examining her nails. “...In a general, cosmological sense. The specifics are so modern.”
“So you're telling me Da Ji, the legendary scourge of kings, master of manipulation and intelligence, doesn't know where one of the most important cultivation family’s ancestral grounds is located?”
“It was never relevant to my work!” Kayo snapped. A hint of a pout formed. “I toppled dynasties, I didn't file real estate paperwork for dead Daoists! How was I to know I'd need the address centuries later?”
Su Yao let out a long, weary sigh. “Unbelievable. You're jobless. And you're useless for basic logistics.” She turned back to the terminal. Her fingers flew across the keyboard. “I'll have to cross-reference geological surveys with historical feng shui maps. It'll take hours.”
Kayo floated closer, peering at the screen with renewed interest. “Well, this looks tedious. I suppose even a goddess of destruction must occasionally stoop to administrative tasks.” She sighed dramatically. “I'll watch for moral support.”
“On second thought,” Kayo mused, tapping her chin with a slender finger, “perhaps I should simply apply for the position.”
“What position?”
“The vacant Demon Queen position in the Yamato’s Hundred Demons, of course,” Kayo said, as if it were the most obvious career move. “As Tamamo-no-Mae, my resume is impeccable. I have centuries of experience in sowing chaos, inspiring terror, and looking fabulous while doing it. They're clearly lacking strong leadership. It would be fun. Maybe.”
Su Yao finally stopped typing and turned to stare at her. “You want to lead the faction I am ostensibly fighting against?”
Kayo waved her hand. “I'd streamline their operations, give them a proper aesthetic direction, and then we'd see. If it’s entertaining, I stay. If it’s boring, I burn it to the ground and blame it on internal mismanagement. It’s a win-win solution.”
“You would be a catastrophic and unreliable Demon Queen,” Su Yao stated flatly.
“My dear cousin,” Kayo purred, leaning in. “I have always been a catastrophic and unreliable Demon Queen. That is my brand. Besides, think of the intelligence you'd gain! A spy in the very heart of your enemy’s camp. Your very own Demon Queen on the inside.”
“I'd have a viper in my ear,” Su Yao retorted. “You'd switch sides the moment it became more amusing.”
Kayo’s smile was all sharp edges. “Would I? Or would the sheer bureaucratic tedium of running a multinational occult corporation crush my spirit first? It’s an experiment! For science. I could have business cards printed. ‘CEO of Calamity.’ It has a ring to it.”
She produced a pristine white business card from her pocker, flicking it between two fingers. “See? Proof of concept.”
“Focus,” Su Yao snapped, gesturing back to the screen. “The tomb first. Your corporate takeover fantasies later.”
“Fine, fine,” Kayo acquiesced, though her eyes still gleamed with the dangerous light of a new, chaotic hobby. “If we find his tomb boring, I'm submitting my application immediately.”
Su Yao ignored her. Her hand hovered over the terminal. A new, simple thought occurred to her. I am overcomplicating this.
Cross-referencing ancient maps or deciphering classified files was unnecessary. She pulled out her indestructible phone and scrolled to a contact simply labeled ‘Spirit Bait.’
“What are you doing now?” Kayo asked, peering over her shoulder.
“Asking for directions,” Su Yao said flatly, and pressed call.
The phone rang twice. “Hello? Xiao Ling?” Li Xiu’s gentle voice came through the speaker.
“Li Xiu. I need the geographical coordinates for your family’s ancestral tomb,” Su Yao stated without preamble.
A stunned silence followed on the other end. “The ancestral tomb? Why would you need that? I'm not sure I'm allowed to divulge that.”
“Your family’s curse stems from your progenitor, Li Xuan,” Su Yao said. Her tone left no room for argument. “I am investigating the root cause. The tomb is the next logical step. Give me the coordinates. Now.”
The sheer audacity and authority in her voice brooked no refusal. They heard Li Xiu take a shaky breath, followed by the sound of frantic typing.
“It’s on a private mountain preserve west of the city. I'm sending the GPS pin to your phone now.” A moment later, Su Yao’s device chimed. “But please be respectful. It’s a sacred place.”
“Your ancestor poisoned me. Respect is negotiable.” Su Yao ended the call.
She looked at the coordinates now displayed on her screen, then at Kayo’s utterly delighted face.
“Well,” Kayo said, impressed. “That was brutishly efficient. I suppose sometimes the direct approach does have its merits.”
“Let’s go,” Su Yao said, turning toward the door. “Before your boredom leads you to actually email a resume to a doomsday cult.”
“Oh, the draft is already saved,” Kayo chirped, following her. “But this does sound more fun for now.”
Su Yao and Kayo teleported to the coordinates Li Xiu had provided, arriving at the edge of what should have been a secluded, forested mountain preserve. Instead, they were greeted by a scene of utter desolation.
The once-sacred grounds were now littered with crude fortifications and drunken oni roaring around bonfires. At the center of the chaos, a massive, red-skinned oni with horns and a leering grin held court from a throne carved from the mountain itself.
Kayo let out a low, appreciative whistle. “Well, well. Looks like Shuten Dōji has decided to upgrade his resume. He’s turned this place into his own personal Mount Ooei. How nostalgic.”
Su Yao’s eyes narrowed, taking in the scene. “I don't have time for this. We need to get to the tomb.”
“Oh, come now, cousin,” Kayo purred. Her eyes gleamed with anticipation. “This is a perfect opportunity. Shuten Dōji is one of Japan’s most famous oni, a legendary drunkard and brawler. If he’s set up shop here, it means he’s likely working with the Hundred Demons. Taking him down would be a statement. It might even be fun.”
Before Su Yao could respond, Shuten Dōji bellowed, spotting them. “Who dares intrude on my new domain? More snacks for my party?”
Kayo stepped forward. Her form radiated ancient power. “Shuten Dōji! I thought you were sealed away centuries ago. Still clinging to your pathetic dreams of conquest? Go away, this mountain is already taken.”
Shuten Dōji roared with laughter, hefting a massive gourd of sake. “Tamamo-no-Mae! You're always so dramatic. Join me! We can rule this world together just like old times.”
“Tempting,” Kayo said with a mock sigh. “But I'm currently employed as a consultant for chaos, and my cousin here is on a deadline. So, if you could kindly step aside...”
Su Yao had already had enough. She flexed her fingers. Cursed energy from the Tatarigami she had absorbed swirled around her hands. “Enough talk. Kayo, if you want to prove your usefulness, now is the time.”
Kayo grinned, cracking her neck. “With pleasure. Let’s show this overgrown drunk what happens when you mess with our family outing.”
Shuten Dōji’s eyes glowed with rage as he charged. His oni minions swarmed behind him. The battle for the Li ancestral tomb had begun.
A chorus of hoarse yells erupted from the oni ranks.
“BANZAI—!”
“For the boss!”
“Drink first, kill later!”
Cups and gourds flew from clawed hands and burst against the stones as the oni rushed forward, blades waving wildly overhead. One tripped on a broken step.
“Oi—watch it—!”
He went down hard, dragged two others with him, and all three tumbled together in a knot of limbs and laughter.
“Still counts if we reach them!”
“BANZAAA—AAAH—!”
Their screams echoed as they rolled downhill toward the defenders, weapons spinning loose across the ground.
“Really?” Su Yao sighed. The sound dripped with utter boredom as another wave of drunken oni minions lurched toward them. “He just keeps sending them. Does he think quantity outweighs quality?”
Kayo unleashed a wave of pale blue foxfire that incinerated a dozen oni into screaming ash with a flick of her wrist. “It’s the classic management fallacy, cousin! Middle management believes that throwing more bodies at a problem will solve it. He’s forgotten the art of precision.”
Su Yao raised a hand. The Tatarigami cursed energy she'd absorbed lashed out like a whip of pure calamity. It unraveled the oni it touched. Their forms dissolved into misfortune and decay before they could even scream.
“This is tedious,” Su Yao stated. Her voice cut through the roars and chaos. She took a step forward, then another, a walking vortex of destruction. Oni crumbled to dust merely from her passing spiritual pressure. “He’s stalling.”
“Or he’s just unimaginative,” Kayo offered, idly reforming a vaporized oni’s club into a bouquet of wilting flowers before tossing it aside. “It’s always the same with the muscle-bound types, no tactical nuance.”
From his throne, Shuten Dōji’s roaring laughter had faltered, replaced by a grinding scowl. He watched his entire frontline evaporate without the two women even breaking a sweat.
“ENOUGH!” he bellowed, finally heaving his massive bulk from the stone throne. The mountain itself seemed to tremble. “If you want something done right...”
“Finally,” Su Yao and Kayo said in near-unison, both turning their full attention to the advancing Demon Lord.
“...you have to do it yourself!” he roared, charging forward. His iconic kanabō club materialized in his hands, ready to smash them into the earth.
Su Yao merely cracked her neck. “Try not to get in my way, cousin.”
Kayo’s smile was a blade. “I was about to say the same thing.”
Shuten Dōji’s charge split the earth. His kanabō club whistled through the air with enough force to shatter a mountain. Su Yao met the blow with a palm strike infused with Tatarigami curse energy. The impact erupted in a shockwave that vaporized the nearest oni and sent trees flying like matchsticks.
Kayo flowed around the blast. Her form became a blur of pale light as she unleashed a volley of foxfire projectiles that seared into Shuten Dōji’s back. “He’s sturdier than I remembered!” she called out, dodging a backhand swing that carved a canyon into the ground.
“You're one to talk, you treacherous fox!” Shuten Dōji roared, though the wounds from Kayo’s attack were already healing.
His flesh knitted back together with demonic vigor. He took a deep swig from his massive sake gourd, never breaking stride. “This is my favorite vintage! I couldn't let it go to waste while dealing with pests.”
Su Yao danced through another swing. Her movements were precise and economical. With a flick of her wrist, she sent a wave of corrosive curse energy that ate away at his club, the metal sizzling and pitting.
“You sent waves of your followers to their deaths because you were drinking?” she asked. Her voice was cold with disdain. “What kind of leader does that?”
“The kind who enjoys a good party!” Shuten Dōji laughed, slamming his gourd into the ground and finally finishing the sake with a satisfied gasp.
“Now that I'm properly refreshed, let’s get serious!” His aura exploded. Crimson energy swirled around him like a typhoon. The very air grew heavy with the scent of alcohol. His eyes glowed with manic intensity.
He moved faster than before. His club became a whirlwind of destruction. Su Yao and Kayo were forced on the defensive. Their combined powers clashed against his in a spectacle of light and shadow. Kayo summoned illusions, while Su Yao harnessed the Tatarigami energy to unleash plagues of misfortune that weakened his spiritual defenses.
“This is more like it!” Kayo grinned, carving a deep gash in his arm with a blade of condensed malice. “But you're still on my family’s property. Eviction notice is served!”
Shuten Dōji merely grinned. His body regenerated almost instantly. “You'll have to try harder than that! This mountain is mine now, and I'll use the tomb’s energy to build a new empire of chaos!”
Su Yao’s eyes narrowed. “Over my dead body.”
“Preferably!” he bellowed, charging again.
As Su Yao gracefully sidestepped the crushing blow, the sheer absurdity of Kayo’s statement cut through the battle-focus. “Since when is this mountain your family’s property?” she demanded, unleashing a volley of cursed spikes that forced Shuten Dōji to raise his club defensively.
Kayo phased through a shockwave, reappearing atop a crumbling rock spire. “Since it was promised to me 3000 years ago,” she stated imperiously, as if that explained everything. Then she conjured a whirlwind of spectral cherry blossoms that sliced into the oni lord’s shoulders.
Shuten Dōji roared, shaking off the attack. “Lies! This land has always been—”
“I have a contract!” Kayo interrupted. Her voice rang with theatrical offense. “Signed in blood and starlight! The details are none of your concern, you intoxicated squatter!”
Su Yao blasted a wave of decay that eroded the ground beneath Shuten Dōji’s feet. “You expect me to believe you've held a 3,000-year-old real estate claim and never mentioned it until now?”
“I don't expect you to believe anything, cousin. I expect you to help me evict the tenant!” Kayo retorted without missing a beat. “Now, are you going to help me enforce my ancestral land rights or not?”
Shuten Dōji, enraged by the bureaucratic turn in the conversation, swung his club with renewed fury. “I'LL SHOW YOU A DEED!”
Su Yao sighed, the sound lost in the chaos. I'm fighting a drunk demon lord over a property dispute with a fox spirit who is my cousin. This is my life now. She decided to table the issue for later. “Just try not to get us both killed over a technicality,” she muttered, diving back into the fray.
“Enough of this farce!” Kayo declared. Her form blazed with nascent, catastrophic energy. Pale light swirled around her, and the air itself seemed to scream as she prepared to unleash an attack that would likely scrawl her name across the local geology. “Let me end this with a single, beautiful—”
“Don't,” Su Yao’s voice cut through the gathering power, flat and absolute.
Kayo’s concentration faltered. “What? Why? This oaf is—”
“You'll damage the tomb,” Su Yao stated as she neatly evaded a swing of Shuten Dōji’s club and redirected its force into a group of oni minions. “The structural integrity of the mountain is already compromised by his presence. Your ‘ultimate move’ would collapse the entire cavern system, burying Li Xuan’s secrets under a trillion tons of rock. That is the only reason I am not fighting at full power.”
Shuten Dōji, who had been mid-roar, paused. His drunken brain processed this. “You two are holding back? Because of a grave?” He let out a confused, rumbling laugh. “What kind of demons are you?”
“The pragmatic kind,” Su Yao said. Her eyes were cold. “Now, Kayo. Either help me subdue him with precision, or go back to drafting your resume. But you will not obliterate my lead.”
Kayo let out a theatrical huff. The apocalyptic energy around her dissipated into a few harmless sparks. “Fine! Ruin all my fun with your ‘logic’ and ‘patience’. But you owe me a new mountain after this.”
She refocused. Her eyes narrowed on Shuten Dōji. “Alright, you overgrown lush. The eviction just got delicate. This might actually require some finesse.”