World’s Cutest Alchemist

‘Current Rating - Holy! Did you sell off your skill at the pawn store or something? I bet you barely got even a dollar for it!’

…

‘Current Rating - Where’d you buy your strength? The thrift store? Hurry back and refund it cause you got scammed!’

…

‘Current Rating - Congratulations! You’ve earned a gold medal! For being the absolute worst!’

…

‘Current Rating - Really? That’s it? Did you slip and fall or something? How could you get a score this low?’

…

‘Current Rating - Hey! Hey! Here’s a tip! Do better!’

…

‘Current Rating - Haah…Just go next. It’s a waste of words to teach you anything since you clearly don’t listen.’

…

‘Current Rating - Oh my God! You’ve done it! You’ve successfully made it…As the worst user of this machine to this date! When should I mail you the trophy?’

…

‘Current Rating - Are you even trying? Or do you just want to see more of these insults? Are you a masochist or something?’

…

‘Current Rating - Here, close your eyes. What do you see? Nothing? That’s exactly your current skill level!’

…

‘Current Rating - Come on class, today we’re learning how to count! I’ll go first…One…Huh? You can’t count this high?’

…

‘Current Rating - I’m getting concerned for your mental health.

…

‘Current Rating - What’re you? A masochist? Does seeing these insults pleasure you or something?’

“Hey!” I shouted, “You already used that quote, you dumb machine!”

Or was it something similar? I remember seeing something about masochists. I don’t know, but! What’re the machine makers lazy or something!? How could you reuse a quote already!?

I’m only…326 quotes in!

How do they expect me to play this game…Ah, I mean, train my mana if the creators can’t even be bothered to come up with original insults!

“Bah!” I let out a breath of air and stretched my arms wide.

Well, fine, you dog of a machine, let’s see your next quote. If it’s something you’ve already used before…Well, let’s just say the Little Bomber may have something to say about it!

…

‘Current Weight - 87’

Hehe, more! Higher! Come on! I’m ready for the next one!

The number ticked up by 1.

‘You Died!’

‘Score - 88’

‘Current Rating - Awww, did poor little baby get a bad score? Do we need to turn on easy mode for you?’

“Pfft!” I spat out, chuckling.

I got a new high score! C’mon! This is just way too easy! All I have to do is imbue my mana and the score goes up! Knitting was way harder than this kid’s game!

Stolen from NovelPhoenix, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.

‘Try Again?’

Of course!

As I went to imbue my mana, a tap came to my shoulder followed by the sound of a familiar voice.

“Hey.”

Turning, I smiled as I saw a familiar girl.

“Hi, Mouse! Is it time already?” I asked.

“Yeah,” She nodded, “It’s already been a few hours.”

“What? Really?” I checked my phone and saw that it was already afternoon, “Wow, I didn’t even realize. Alright, let’s go, I gotta feed the mouse.” I joked.

“Stop saying it like you’re feeding a pet!” She glared at me.

“Hehe, so, you’re not hungry?”

“…I am.”

“Then, let’s go, silly.” I stood up.

“Haah…” She sighed before we left.

In the car, I faithfully fulfilled my passenger duty to play music.

“So, what score are you on now?” She asked.

“88!” I cheerfully replied, “I’ve already gone through so many end-screens.”

“…Why do I feel like you’re more excited about collecting the quotes than actually training your mana strength?”

“You’re imagining it.” I replied with the most steadfast tone I could muster.

“Haah…” Luna sighed, but I could see that smile on her lips. Such a tsundere.

“…Why did I just get an urge to flick you?” Luna asked.

“Huh? Why would you do such a thing?” I replied as if wronged.

…Such a mind-reading tsundere!

With furrowed brows, Luna glanced at me suspiciously but, having no evidence, she could only refocus on the road ahead.

Safe!

Hehe. Internally giggling, I smiled as I stared out the window.

How does this even help my mana anyways? Honestly, I’ve just been doing it since I liked seeing the number go up. I have no idea if it’s actually strengthening my mana.

Closing my eyes, I drew out a string of mana from my core. I let it circle around in a pathway as I focused in on the finer details.

Huh?

It’s actually becoming more smooth?

When I originally saw it, the mana had so many jagged, sharp edges and holes in it. Now…It seems to have less? Even the holes are almost patched up.

Wow, I can’t believe it actually works. Looks like seeing numbers go up is all that matters!

Hehe.

Though, I am a little curious about the specifics of how it actually works. All I seem to be doing is imbuing my mana into a handle, yet, it’s fixing itself? Anyone with eyes could see that there’s something more complex going on in the background.

And say it with me! When in doubt, just ask! The worst that can happen is getting a flick to the forehead for asking something dumb!

“Mouse, how does the machine actually work? Why is my mana actually looking a little better than before?”

“Now you ask…?” She said, “Well, actually, at least you’re asking…I wouldn’t have been surprised if you waited until you reached the max number before actually looking into what it does.”

“Hey!” I started my retort than paused…You know what? That actually does sound like me. “Never mind, carry on.”

“Pfft.” Luna chuckled, smiling as she replied, “The machine is basically putting pressure on your mana. The score or weight is the amount of pressure on your mana; It gradually eases you into it, so that your mana can withstand more and more pressure as it adapts.”

“Hm…I see.” I nodded thoughtfully, “So, I understand the mechanic, but, how does it affect more than what’s in the handle? Like…Hm…Words are hard, um…”

“You mean, why does the mana come out of your core strengthened?”

“Yes.” I nodded, “If the machine is putting pressure on my mana that’s inside the handle, why does that also affect the mana coming out of my core?”

“To explain it in a way you’d understand, it’s becoming mana memory.”

“Ahhh, I get it.” I nodded thoughtfully, “Then, is it possible for it to go back to F grade after I reach E grade?”

“Technically yes, but you don’t have to worry about it.” Luna said, “Mana strength could revert if your core gets badly damaged. But, it’s very hard for that to happen unless it’s purposefully aimed for.”

“I see, I see.” I stroked my chin.

…

After eating lunch at a nearby restaurant, we were back at the AT room. We greeted the familiar receptionist and I made my way to the mana strengthening machine.

“Are you going back to the reaction speed training area?” I asked.

“Mhm.” Luna nodded, “Is it fine with you if we leave after a few hours…?” She hesitantly asked, “I’m uh…I don’t exactly have the endurance and focus that you have when it comes to things other than movies or games.”

“If I say ‘No’, will you stay?” I asked with a tilted head.

“…” Luna didn’t reply immediately, seemingly in thought, “…If I ask you to leave with me, will you?”

Oh! How the turns have tabled! Hehe.

“I will.” I smiled.

“…I would stay if you asked too…”

“Ah, then, if we both ask each other. Does that mean I’ll go home while you stay here?” I teasingly asked.

“…Haah.” She sighed, “No, never mind, I’d leave immediately even if you asked me to stay.”

“Hehe, so mean! Fine, go on! Get! Skedaddle! I need to train!”

“Pfft, alright, I’ll be back in a few hours.” Luna smiled.

After watching her leave, I turned my attention to the bastard machine.

Hehe, time to collect more quotes!

…

‘Current Rating - Weakling~ Trash~ Loser~ So bad~ Can’t even reach 100~’

…

‘Current Rating - Hmph! It’s not like I expected you to do better or anything anyways, idiot!’

…

‘Current Rating - Oh. I see.’

…

‘Current Rating - At this rate, you’ll stay here with me forever. Hehehe, just the two of us. Forever.’

…

‘Current Weight - 98’

Come on! Hold! Hold! Hold!!!!

It ticked up by 1.

‘Current Weight - 99’

I survived!! Yes!!!

I wanted to jump around and cheer loudly, but, I wasn’t done yet! Plus, even for someone as shameless as me…That’d be kind of embarrassing to do here.

Biting my lip, I focused all my attention on making sure my mana didn’t snap before the score ticked up.

And a few seconds later…

‘You Died!’

‘Score - 100’

‘Current Rating - Hmph, well, you’ve finally ranked up. I guess that’s not totally awful for someone like you!’

Tsundere ending!! Yes!!!

I pumped my fists in the air, silently shouting my cheers. I had a strong urge to jump up and down, but, I held myself back.

After a few moments of celebration, I eventually calmed myself down. But, I couldn’t hide my smile.

Now, I should officially be in the E grade in terms of mana strength.

Closing my eyes, I took a close look at my mana. The edges and jaggedness of it had severely lessened. Now, it looked like a kid trying to draw a straight line; It wasn’t completely smooth, but, now it at least didn’t look like an arthritis patient had drawn it.

Though, now I’m curious. Luna’s C+ grade mana strength had looked completely smooth. What does the next grades look like? I can’t even imagine what B or A grade would look like.

Stretching, I took a deep breath before grasping the handle.

Well, no reason to stop here, is there?

…

‘Score - 111’

Hehe. I smiled, looking at my score.

After hitting E grade, the machine had began starting at a weight of 100.

Unfortunately, the progress wasn’t as smooth as the first 100 levels though. Now, it takes multiple deaths for the score to tick up by 1.

I guess it’s been too smooth-sailing so far.

But! I wasn’t demotivated what-so-ever! After all, dying just means I have more quotes to collect! Hehehe…I’m going to find them all!

Ah, no, I mean, I’m going to reach D grade!

As I went to start the next attempt, a familiar voice sounded from behind me.

“Bin.” It was Luna.

Turning, I smiled looking at the silver-haired girl.

“Is it time already?” I asked.

“Mhm. Already been 3 hours.” Luna replied, showing me her phone.

“Okay~ Then, let’s go home.” I said, standing up.

“So easily? Who’re you!” Luna pointed at me accusingly.

“Pfft,” I chuckled, “I’m the evil Bin!” I said menacingly, “If you want your good Bin back, send 1 compliment to this address within 30 seconds!”

“…The previous Bin was the good Bin? She can get worse!?”

“Hey!” I glared at her, “Hmph! You’ll see just how much badder I can get!”

“And, we’re back to the compliments?! You compliment ghost!”

“…10 seconds.”

“Haha,” Luna laughed, “It’s impressive how long you can focus on a single thing without taking a break.”

“…Accepted.” I replied with a pout, after glaring at her, I promptly turned my head away and crossed my arms.

“Aww, are you mad, Bin?” Luna said with a light voice.

“Yes. I’m cutting down your dinner by one portion.”

“No!” She practically screamed, “I’m sorry! Please! Don’t starve me!” She was almost in tears as she looked at me and grabbed the hem of my clothes.

“Hehe, fine. But, you do know we’re in public, right?” I asked.

“…” Her eyes widened as she finally started to look around. There were quite a few gazes on her. Luna’s entire face and ears turned into a bright red. She looked like a tomato.

Without another word, she grabbed my hand hard and bowed her head, speedwalking out of the room, pulling me along.

“Hehehe!” I giggled, this is such good photo material.