Mad God – Reborn

The meadow was quiet, bathing in the last of the day's light as the sun dipped lower and lower. It was painting the endless grass in shades of gold now, as if it were a field in autumn, while the pond behind the house reflected the sky perfectly, stars already beginning to appear on its surface. As for Athos, he stood near the water... watching, taking deep breaths right until a sharp voice had disturbed his meditation.

“You’re doing it again.” Nilier’s voice came from behind him, and this time he didn’t turn, and although he didn't raise his voice, it was... tired.

“Doing what?”

“That.” She walked closer, stopping a few steps away, arms crossed, squinting at him, “That look... I can sense the probing waves you send out and... and just top it already! We have been over this more times than I dare to count!”

“Hm.” He nodded, but then... kept continuing.

"Athos!" But he kept himself silent for a minute.

“It’s still there,” He said after a while, his voice quieter than usual. “That feeling... The one I showed you, Nilier. I did... And I don't believe you didn't feel it.”

"..." Nilier didn’t answer immediately, and she already knew where this was going. “Athos…”

“No.” He shook his head slightly. “Don’t. Just… don’t say it. I don't want to think that you are lying to me.”

That made her frown, watching him fully turn towards her while the sun was going down behind him... The more it was sinking, the darker his face looked, and this time around, his red eyes weren’t playful. They were less and less so in the past few decades, but today... She felt them scary for the first time. For the last few years... he had been looking at her even less and less like all those years ago, just as the setting sun, his warmth was also disappearing and... It was hurting her.

“I’ve gone everywhere.” He continued, gesturing vaguely outward, with no particular direction, “Every corner of this world. I searched every mountain, every ocean, every stretch of land that exists, comparing the energies and their taste."

“I know.” She said quietly, "I was there with you, weren't I?"

“Were you?” He paused. "Why do I feel like you were simply making sure I didn't go off the edge?"

"The only edge you are going off is your sanity!" She shouted at him, her fingers balled up.

"Am I?" He asked, searching her eyes, “Or I’m being turned around before I can go any further.”

“Turned around…? Maybe because there is nowhere further,” Nilier replied, her tone suddenly calm but firmer than ever befre before.

"Ah," Athos laughed, shaking his head, “There you go again.”

“I’m telling you what is.” She said in the same, cold voice.

“No.” He stepped closer, as the sun dipped even further behind him, “You’re telling me what you’ve been told to tell me.”

“Don't you dare accuse me of something like that!”

“It is not an accusation, when it’s the truth!” he snapped suddenly, his voice rising just a little but then stopped, bringing it back down, smiling in a way that wasn't a smile at all, "You didn’t even hesitate.”

“What?” Nilier asked, flinching now, both angry and anxious, so much so that she wanted to scream.

“You didn’t think about it.” He said, tilting his head... replaying their trips, their talks, Nilier's movements, her gaze and tone, everything. “Heh... You just repeated it. Like a rule... A practiced lie.”

"I..." Nilier’s lips parted, then closed. “I am not lying to you…" She said with a strained voice, "Because I know it.”

“...” He just kept looking at her, without blinking, now the sun barely visible on the horizon, turning dusk to night.

“I know it!”

“No, you don’t.” Athos shot back, his voice barely above a whisper. “You’ve never questioned it... Not once..." He muttered, throwing a gaze up towards the sky for a brief second, "Because you already know the answer to it, don't you?”

“No! It's because there’s nothing to question!”

“Then why do I feel it?” He asked, raising his hand to touch hers, but then, just before it happened, he pulled it back, shaking his head, just as the last rays of the sun had disappeared. He had done this too many times, and he showed it to her over and over again, just to receive the same answer.

"..."

Once again, there was no answer to his constant question. Finally blinking his eyes, Athos’s chest rose and fell slowly, battling with frustration.

“It’s not random.” He said simply, "And it isn't my imagination."

"Hmph!" Nilier looked away while speaking, “I don’t feel anything.”

“That’s not true.”

“It is.”

“Stop lying to me.” He stepped closer again. “I had had enough. I can no longer ignore it!”

"Lying?!" Her jaw tightened. “Stop it!”

“Stop what?”

“This!” she snapped, turning back to him. “This obsession! Your accusations! This... This madness! You’re chasing something that doesn’t exist! Just drop it! Stop it! Forget about it and come back living with me in the present!”

“You’re defending something you don’t understand... Are you... afraid of something?”

“I understand it perfectly!” She snapped at him at that.

“So you know about it... I knew it. Then explain it!” He snorted, drilling his red eyes into hers, and at that... Nilier froze in place, while Athos saw the answer he was looking for, right in there. "Go on.”

"..."

“You keep saying the same thing,” he continued. “Then explain it to me.”

“I already have!”

“No.” His voice dropped, grew cold, and took on a tone she had never heard from him before. “You are a liar.”

"...!" Nilier took a step back this time. “Athos…”

“What are you hiding?” He asked, not chasing her, simply looking at her with an increasingly emotionless look.

“No… I... Nothing.”

“That’s another lie.”

“It’s not!” She yelled back at him, but Athos refused to raise his voice.

“Then look at my eyes and say it again.” She didn’t... And that was enough for him to exhale slowly. “So there is something... that is worth more than what we have. Okay... Okay. I can respect that, but I respect myself more than to keep taking a lie and pretend it's the truth.”

"Athos!" Nilier clenched her fists, her nails digging into her palm, “You’re twisting things!”

“No.” He shook his head. “I’m seeing them clearly for the first time.”

“You’re scaring me...” She muttered, trying to breathe, but it came way too hard now.

“Good.”

"Huh?!" Nilier’s eyes widened. “Wha… What?”

“You should be scared,” he said quietly. “Because something is wrong and you’re pretending it isn’t. I don't know what it is, Nilier... But now I won't rest until I find out about it.”

“ATHOS!" She finally screamed at him, from the top of her lungs, "I’m trying to protect you!”

The words slipped out before she could stop them, and at that, both of them froze, while Athos’s eyes softened instantly, but not enough to warm up his following words.

“From what?” Nilier’s lips parted for an answer, but it never came, “Nilier.” He stepped closer, but stayed far enough to not reach her. “If you’re protecting me… then tell me.”

“Just forget it... Please... Athos... Please!”

"..." Athos stared at her. “Do you trust me?” he asked suddenly.

“What kind of question is that?” Nilier blinked when hearing it, coming out of nowhere.

“A simple one.”

“I…" She hesitated a little, "Y-yeah, yes! Of course I do!”

“Then prove it. If you really love me… and trust me, then tell me the truth.”

“…I…” Her voice trembled, but once again, there was only silence.

“I see.” Athos sighed after waiting for a whole minute, shaking his head, taking a step backward this time, causing her eyes to widen.

“Athos—”

“No." He raised a hand, "You don’t get to say my name like that. You made your choice,” he continued, "Use my title from now on."

“I didn’t—!”

“You did.” He cut her off. “You chose not to trust me. That's enough for me to know where we stand.”

“That’s not true!”

“Then why didn’t you answer?”

“I—”

Nothing came out... Again... Only that damned, angering silence!

“…I can’t do this.” He moaned, raising both hands, rubbing his face, wiping his eyes, while Nilier felt something crack inside her.

“…What do you mean?” She asked with a monotone, almost empty voice.

“I can fight gods,” he said quietly with a growing distance in his eyes. “I can break worlds if I have to, and I can and will stand against anything... But I can’t stand next to someone who lies to me.”

“I’m not lying!”

“You’re hiding the truth,” he muttered, “And it... may be even worse than lying.”

“Athos, please—” she stepped forward now, but then, he stepped back, holding the distance between them, and that single move alone hurt Nilier more than anything he had said until that point.

“When you decide to be honest…” he continued, his voice barely having any warmth, “Then we can talk.”

“And until then?” Nilier asked, barely seeing him through the tears in her eyes.

“I can’t trust you,” he said without hesitation, "Goodbye... Nilier." He nodded his head just a bit, and before she could say anything, he was gone... leaving her alone in her pocket realm that hadn't felt this empty... not even when she lived here all by herself.

...

....

......

"Ugh..." Ren moaned, opening her eyes to a dark ceiling and starting to remember a lot of things. "Fuuuuck..." She moaned again, unable to really move her body.

Not that she wanted to. It was too... exhausting. But the way it hurt told her she was still alive. That made her chuckle, which hurt even more, but then, she exhaled, closing her eyes, remembering the dream he had. She hadn't thought of that day for a very... very long time. Doing it now, she couldn't help but moan a third time, because she was frustrated that Nilier never showed up to talk after it. Hundreds of years passed, without them ever crossing paths again... right until he began his final act. After learning everything, realizing that there was more outside, that their realm was hidden, until he proved it by tearing the Sky open, she didn't look for him.

"Wait..." Her eyes suddenly opened, furrowing the brows that were hidden beneath her bandages. "Damn..."

In that moment, Ren understood something important:

The reason why a dead God was sleeping under a temple in the forest.

Was it why Nilier wanted him to drop the search? Was he someone from outside... or...?

"Tsk... There are still things I don't know... Haaah... Not that I can do anything about it yet... But... When I can, I definitely should."