Amaranthine

Nick was cuddled up on top of Gwyn, lazily teasing her as they watched the fourth installment of a bad creature feature series. Ironically, this was where the series started to get good, its cult following attracting some actual talent to its revival. Gwyn had been getting more and more difficult to satiate, and Nick effectively had to distract himself, lest he give in and risk something happening he regretted. Not that he’d regret the sex, he was good to go for that, but if he hurt her during…. Well, he’d probably do suicide by Cait. He couldn’t live with that.

So, instead of focusing on the soft, warm skin of Gwyn’s luscious breasts under his tentacles, or the pleasing elasticity of her hardened nipples beneath the tips, not to mention the noises she made, like fucking ambrosia to his-

Nope! He thought, shaking his center mass as he focused back on the TV, letting his tentacles do their own thing. Damn, they really upped the budget on GourdDick’s costume for this one. Or is that an animatronic?

The screen went black. That also meant the nano-display Nick could see shut off, so he noticed. Gwyn made a frustrated mewl of annoyance when he stopped circling her clit, but it cut off short when she noticed something was wrong.

“What the hell?” she said, “the power at AEGIS shouldn’t be able to be out!”

Nick extended his senses, taking in as much as he could. The scent of Gwyn’s arousal was almost overwhelming, and very distracting, but he could also tell her concern was real. He got more of that from across the building, this was not normal.

Gwyn summoned her comm, frowning at the display.

“Nothing,” she said. Her grip tightened around the base of one of his tentacles. “C’mon, babe, let’s get to Swan’s office, this isn’t right.”

WILL SHE BE THERE?

ITS LIKE 10

“She’s always there,” responded Gwyn. She got up, and Nick pulled himself off her lap, to an annoyed mrrr from Salad, seated on a pillow next to them. Nick patted him on the head while Gwyn changed into more modest clothes, and panties that weren’t soaked through.

It didn’t escape Nick’s notice that two clouds of nanobots floated out of the pockets on the lab coat Gwyn donned, each hovering near the back of her hands.

Damn, she’s really freaked out.

Nick wrapped a (hopefully) comforting tentacle around her waist, and pushed open the hall door. Before they could exit, Nick went stiff as his senses picked up the unmistakable crackle of gunfire from near the entrance to the park, followed by a BOOM that would have deafened him if he had ears.

He tried to talk over comms, the time for cute hat-based communication had passed, but Gwyn didn’t seem to hear him.

“What the hell was that?” she asked. He could feel her heart beat faster, her breath get quicker, and the sour stink of fear began to take prominence in her oeuvre. He pulled her head around to look at him

COMMS DOWN

CANT TALK

GOING TO HELP

Gwyn nodded.

“Yeah, lets go,” she said, starting towards the balcony. Nick kept hold of her waist. She glared back at him.

WAIT

IM GOING

MY JOB

Gwyn’s glare turned into a fierce grin.

“That’s cute babe, but I’m not passing this chance up. Swan can’t get mad at me for self defense, right?”

Nick heistantly released the hold he had on her, and she was immediately whisked out the window by a cloud of nanobots.

Shit! Faster than I expected!

He used the patio doorframe to slingshot himself out into the night, pulling himself along on anything convenient to keep pace with Gwyn. As they approached the gate, flashes of gunfire illuminated the area like strobe lights, but Nick didn’t need them to see.

An enormous APC with a weird glowing attachment on the front vomited men like a clown car, all wielding assault rifles blasting away at the guard hut, where Nick could sense a hopelessly outclassed Eyebite being forced to take cover. Even more soldiers streamed in towards the center of the compound, purpose unknown, but certainly not friendly.

“Target rich environment,” Nick heard Gwyn mutter, and the grin on her face made him shiver. Bits of her nanocloud began to condense, dropping like heavy rain onto the charging army. It didn’t seem like it did anything at first, until the raindrops started to explode.

Geysers of blood and boy parts shot up along her path as she zeroed in on the APC.

Jesus fucking christ, and people are scared of me!?

Nick followed her, unwilling to let her go into danger alone despite getting the feeling that in pretty much any scenario, Gwyn, or probably Nanosmith right now, was the danger.

Still needs someone to watch her back. I don’t mind playing sidekick to someone as badass as my girlfriend.

Nick shot a tentacle out, spearing it through the chest of one of the invaders grouped around the APC. Again, killing was as easy as breathing. Easier, breathing didn’t feel like a titjob from god.

He used the slumping corpse as an anchor, slinging himself down, splaying his sharp reinforced tips to go what Cait called ‘Blender mode’. Between him and Gwyn, who directed flitting spears of nanobots like an orchestra boss, they were killing dudes faster than they could get out of the APC.

There are WAY more of these guys than there possibly could be in there, he thought, whipping an arm straight through 3 at once. Also, holy shit, maybe I AM the scary one.

A horrible biting chill seared his mind, then the affected tentacles went numb before shattering completely. A slender female form slid out of the APC, blasting a volley of freezing rays in his direction. He hissed as a few hit home, leaving paradoxically burning patches of frostbite on his arms. In an instsnt, he was no longer her target, and the frosty bitch flew off on a disc of ice, straight towards Gwyn. She gathered a giant icicle from thin air, assuming javelin posture.

Nick’s hail mary tentacle missed her, but caught the disc, shattering it, and the figure tumbled. Tumbled hard enough, in fact that it shattered against the ground.

Huh. That was ea-

Nick shreiked as another icicle pierced his center mass, squirming to try and get away from the sudden, noxious pain.

“Ice clone,” said a surprisingly warm voice from behind him. “Impressive, right? Always tricks the boy scouts….. or whatever you are.”

He felt his opponent yank the icicle out of him. This little monster wasn’t down for the count yet though.

Nick snaked a tentacle around her ankle, yanking hard and sending her to the floor with a ‘whup!”. He want to yank her into the air and slam her down, but as he applied the pressure, a blast of cold emanated from her ankle, and the now fragile tentacle snapped, sending pain like shards of glass through his mind.

“Already closing up, huh?” the woman said, amused. “Guess I gotta go colder to cryolize that regeneration, my bad.”

ICE PUN

“Huh, that’s cute.”

USE MORE

ICE PUNS

He whipped another tentacle out, feinting towards her right. He saw her smirk, and in his Altered sense he saw a collection of the swirling blue-white energy collect right where he would connect. Nick stopped that strike, instead spearing forward with one of his reinforced tips.

“Whoa!” the frost woman said, barely dodging the strike. She smiled at Nick, absolutely fucking aggravating. “Quick learner! Hey, Po’Boy, gimme an assist with this blorbo thing.”

A monster skittered thunderously(somehow) out of the APC, too many tiny legs, too many big ass claws, and way too much like a fucked up shrimp.

HEH

GOOD NAME

Nick shot another reinforced tip towards Po’Boy’s carapaced hide, but those claws were fast, and Nick found himself shreiking again as the reinforced tip fell to the ground, cleanly snipped off.

WELL

FUCK

“Hah, yeah, sorry little guy,” Frost lady said with a shrug. She conjured another enormous icicle. “Wrong side and all that.”

Po’Boy snipped menacingly.

NOPE!

This wasn’t Nick’s first time fighting enemies that hurt to hit. Hell, with the shit elemental and Ironhide, it was becoming something of a specialty. He whipped himself away, and the woman cursed as her icicle whizzed right past him.

Predator mode, Nick thought, losing himself in the trees. He kept an eye on the fight, knowing it wouldn’t be long before the two Altereds turned their ire on Gwyn. She was kicking ass, and might be able to take these two herself, but no reason to take chances.

Nick already had a couple of the tentacles he’d lost back, leaving him at a formidable ten, although only one remaining reinforced tip. He’d bet whatever Guardians made in a month, he hadn’t checked, that that tip was his only shot at getting through Po’boy’s carapace.

Unless my girlfriend kills him out right. Thank god for powerful women.

The ice Altered shot a freezing bolt at Gwyn, but it was intercepted by a cloud of nanobots.

Except that bitch.

Nick moved, swinging high, using buildings and trees to skirt around the edges of the fight to the side opposite of the direction he’d fled. Gwyn was hard pressed, slaughtering myriad invaders with one hand, but dodging ice blast and claw strikes on the other, unable to free a swarm long enough to get to…

I’m just gonna call her Frostie.

Nick arced himself into the night sky, unwilling to let Gwyn be harrassed a second longer. He flew like a fell meteor, blocking out stars as he drew back his remaining reinforced tip, aiming, and finally realeasing. His aim was excellent, and with a ch-chink his tip entered the back of Po’Boy’s head and exited through his mouth, and there was one less threat for his girlfriend to deal with.

“Holy fuck!” screamed Frostie as her monster-shrimp cohort’s corspe was driven to the ground when Nick slammed into it. He spun on her, releasing a feral hiss, and finally, the bitch looked a little scared.

“Hell yeah boyfriend!” Gwyn yelled, pumping a fist into the air. “Switch!”

Nick grabbed her around the waist and yoinked, switching their positions. With regrown tentacles and plenty of bloodlust, stemming the tide of what had to be clone soldiers was a perfect task for him. He went blender mode, ignoring the occaisional bullet they got off to pierce one of his swirling tentacles.

He pushed his multi-channel focus to the limit, keeping a panoramic ‘eye’ on Gwyn and Frostie’s fight. Without any backup, Frostie was much less of a match for Nanosmith unleashed. Gwyn caught every attack, far before it reached her, and her swarms got inexorably closer to her icy opponent, promising a painful, buzzing death. Gwyn herself….

Damn.

Breastman probably shouldn’t have found that maniac smile so hot, but the new part of him, the killer, saw a kindred spirit there, and it woke him like the girl’s fantastic boobs never had.

I’ll unpack that later, he thought, whipping a spare tentacle into the path of an ice blast that looked like it might make it past Gwyn’s guard. He hissed at the instant frostbite, but pain had quickly become an old friend. Gwyn’s swarms were inches from Frostie now, and the ice queen was now fully focused on trying, and failing, to push them back. As Nick watched, they reached her.

It was like watching a petrification scene in a movie. Instead of eating her to nothing, the ‘bots coated her, her body turning grey and metallic as they stole her movement. It took less than a second all told, and she was only able to get out a “Fuuu—” before she was covered and contained.

More or less unopposed, the apocalyptic couple advanced on the APC, shredding its ‘mundane’ defenders like paper. The second they were in range, Gwyn’s ‘bots started dissolving the vehicle in a swarm of sparks and a sound like a grinding buzzsaw. As they consumed the device on the vehicle’s grill, the world exploded in noise.

No, not the world, the comms. The first voice Nick could make out clearly was Dawn’s.

“How many fucking people am I going to have to kill during this hospital stay!?”