V2Ch87-The Baldwin Show
Baldwin led the party of undead with a smile.
Each fighter was armed with a hidden knife or dagger. Nothing that would set off immediate alarm bells, but considering that none of them could be killed with a cut to the throat or a stab to the heart - to say nothing of the shock factor of being attacked by people who looked near death - they should be able to get into close enough quarters that their current weapons would be decisive.
It was time for Baldwin to do what he did best: fuck shit up.
“We’re finally getting some action, boys, and I know you’ve been looking forward to it as much as me,” the revenant said.
“Aren’t we just sneaking into the town and then killing a few guys?” asked Hieron.
“Details. But killing some guys is exactly what I’m talking about.”
“What exactly is Grain like?” asked Brunn. The two fexts were the only ones among this group besides Baldwin who could talk.
“You don’t know?” the revenant asked, raising an eyebrow. “You’re… of a certain age. And I know the miners visit regularly… to get supplies.”
“Yeah, Wutan told me I’d get to go with them next time, but the older guys never let me come before. Then you and the master wiped out the camp.”
“Uh, Hieron?” Baldwin said. “Maybe cover your ears for this.”
“Fuck you, I’m old enough to hear anything he can hear.”
The brat is entering the rebellious teenage phase early, Baldwin thought.
He shook his head.
“All right, although there is trade in this town, about half of its adult population, and something people visit from the mines and the surrounding towns for, are ladies of the night.”
Hopefully none of them recognize me when we’re inside, come to think of it. Could get messy for our cover story of being miners attacked by bandits. No one would believe the bandits killed off a bunch of miners and a squad of soldiers. Not the ragtag bandits I’ve encountered in the past.
“Ladies of the night?” asked Brunn.
“Well, when you’re older, you’ll find that a man has certain needs. You see, when a man and a woman don’t particularly love each other, and he’s got some money…” Baldwin allowed his voice to trail off.
“Oh, this is about sex,” Hieron said confidently.
Baldwin nodded.
“What do you know about sex?!” exclaimed Brunn. “You’re way younger than me!”
“Taller than you, though,” Hieron replied, brushing a bit of his shaggy hair back from his eyes.
Baldwin let the two fexts bicker for a few minutes - including both of them giving incorrect explanations for what sex was - while the party approached the town’s outer walls.
Finally, when they were close enough that it might be an issue, he shushed them both.
“Silence, children,” Baldwin said. “Remember, we have to act now. Hieron, you’re my son. Brunn, you’re particularly close to… Sidon here, since you’re dragging him. The six of us got fucked up by bandits. The rest of the salt miners didn’t make it. You’re both very shaken up. If our cover gets blown somehow, we’ll all have to start killing.”
The undead all nodded in response to Baldwin’s instructions, including the ones pretending to be unconscious. All except Brunn, who looked a little confused.
“Wait, did we stop paying protection money in this story?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Paying what?” the revenant asked. “And to who?”
“Yeah, the older guys used to mention that they paid the desert bandits to leave the camp alone. It didn’t come up often, only every now and then. I think everyone in the Salt Waste pays, ever since the Salt Kings consolidated control over all the other bandits in the desert.”
“Fuckers, you were supposed to call the Army about bandits,” Baldwin said, sighing.
And what’s that about one group consolidating control? That sounds like the kind of thing we should discuss with Tybalt. Maybe a genuine problem for the future.
“It’s not like we could rely on you guys to protect us if it’s a real threat,” Brunn said. He raised his hands defensively. “Not my opinion. I’m just repeating what grown men around me said. They thought that if they tried to get the Army to deal with the bandits, you’d kill a few dozen of the criminals and put their bodies on display, then go home. Then we’d get murdered in our sleep.”
“Hmm. Well, yeah, maybe.” The revenant shook his head. “Either way, time to act natural!”
They were almost close enough for the people manning the walls to see their movements in detail.
The two fexts thankfully disciplined themselves instantly - a real sign they weren’t actual living teenagers, at least not anymore - and returned to the plan, struggling to drag the ‘wounded’ bodies of their colleagues. Baldwin didn’t pretend to struggle carrying Laurent, but he did shift his face into a concerned frown. Hieron and Brunn managed to put on more emotive performances, and Hieron in particular made himself look distraught.
Baldwin decided not to ask what memories or experiences the younger fext was drawing upon for that.
As they drew near enough to hear and be heard, shouts reached them from the watchmen.
“Who goes there?” called a couple of men standing near the top of the wall.
“Wounded men!” Baldwin shouted back. “Attacked by bandits. Help us!”
“Bandits?!” yelled one of the watchmen.
“Someone get down there!” barked the other, turning his head to someone behind him.
As the group of undead waited, Baldwin looked over the defenses and calculated. The wall wasn’t particularly high - just ten feet - reflecting both that the town wasn’t very worried about external threats and that the residents didn’t have a lot of money to waste.
The heads peering out over the tops of the walls disappeared. A few seconds later, a handful of forms appeared through the open gate into town, silhouetted against the sun that had dipped low in the sky.
The figures moved, and Baldwin saw that they were, as expected, the members of the town watch who’d been observing them.
As the two parties approached each other, the revenant hoped that he and the others were putting on a convincing enough act.
“Please, hurry!” called Hieron. “I’m sure old man Laurent here is dying!”
Kid… Then the watchmen sped up, and Baldwin had to resist the urge to smile. Good job, kid, I guess you weren’t overacting at all.
“Laurent, you said?” asked one of the men as the two groups came together. The watchman’s eyes darted down to Laurent’s body, cradled in Baldwin’s arms. “Yeah, I know him. Guys, these are the miners!”
“What’s happened?” asked one of the other watchmen immediately. “We haven’t seen you lot around here in weeks. What have you been eating? We- ” His gaze had been moving over Brunn, Baldwin, and Hieron, but now they had reached the bodies being dragged on the ground. From the look on his face, he had apparently just noticed the injuries scattered all over Deron’s body. “We need to get you all to the infirmary, and you can tell us the story on the way!”
Four of the watchmen took Deron and Sidon by the hands and feet, relieving Hieron and Brunn of their burdens. The fifth offered to take Laurent from Baldwin’s hands, but the revenant shook his head.
“He’s my friend,” Baldwin said. “I’ll carry him.”
The fewer men we have around us, the easier our mission will be. Taking on five men at once is riskier than four, even if just marginally. Hopefully you’ll go back to the wall instead of following.
The fifth watchmen nodded with understanding, and the combined group moved quickly back toward the town.
“What the fuck happened to you all?” the fifth man asked after thirty seconds of walking.
“Fucking bandits, like we said,” Baldwin grunted, trying to sound as if he was laboring hard under Laurent’s weight. Hopefully that would help keep conversation to a minimum.
“But- ”
“These guys are in bad shape,” interjected one of the other watchmen.
That triggered a rushed ten or twenty seconds of worried glances and a couple of hands wandering over the bodies, and then one of the men who had been holding Deron - he had him by the head and shoulders - almost dropped him.
“Perkon!” scolded the fifth man. “The fuck are you doing? These men are already hurt! If you can’t hold your end of a man, give him to me.”
“Sorry, Chuck, it’s just…”
“Just what?” snapped Chuck.
“He’s in worse than bad shape!” blurted Perkon. “I mean, this guy doesn’t have a- ”
Deron let out a tiny cough and shook himself slightly, then went limp again.
“Uh. Huh?” Perkon froze in place and uttered a few noises of confusion as he stared down at Deron’s face.
Baldwin almost bumped into him, the man stopped so suddenly.
“The fuck, Perkon?” asked his partner who was holding Deron’s legs.
“I could have sworn his heart had stopped…”
“You don’t even know how to take a fucking pulse?” grumbled Baldwin. “Vika’s balls, man! Can we get a move on, please?”
“Sure thing,” said Chuck.
The group of men started moving again.
But Baldwin felt genuine tension. Chuck, the one watchman who wasn’t carrying anything, had laid a hand on Deron’s neck as he walked alongside Perkon. The movement was casual, but the revenant could tell from behind Chuck that the man was frowning.
They passed through the gates, and the other watchmen - there looked to be another dozen people - crowded around, trying to get a closer look. This was probably the most interesting thing they’d seen all year at what was going on.
“Back, idiots!” barked a particularly tall and authoritative-sounding one. The only one wearing a helmet in addition to the standard gambeson that all of the watchmen wore. “These men are clearly wounded. Let them pass!”
The men let the undead party and their escort through.
They walked for several more minutes, undisturbed. Baldwin felt some of the tension leave him. But not all of it.
Chuck had taken his hand away from Deron’s throat by the time the group passed the gate area, but his expression when he turned his head was hard for Baldwin to read. Serious, certainly. Suspicious?
Do I need to take him out as soon as I can? The revenant looked around. They were passing by the wheelwright’s place and the Drunken Camel Inn just inside the gate. Up on the left, there would be Madam Aslaug’s, and on the right, the infirmary. He knew that from previous visits. The infirmary being so close to a brothel was no accident. We’re so damned close… Just twenty more feet and a right turn, and we’ll be there.
There were still a few people outdoors despite the late hour. It wouldn’t be ideal for the undead to just turn on the guards here without causing a major commotion. They might put the town more on guard, as well as potentially getting apprehended before it was time for them to do their job.
Then again, it’s not like they have a significant force besides the watchmen. If we get the element of surprise…
The group moved another five feet.
Ten feet.
Fifteen.
Baldwin felt relief as they stepped into the shadow of the infirmary.
We’ll take care of them once we get inside. Quietly.
The watchman in the lead lowered Deron’s feet to the ground and put a hand on the door of the building.
“Baldwin?” came a female voice from across the street.
The revenant controlled his reactions. He didn’t turn, didn’t react. Not a single muscle twitched. Such was the awesome control afforded him by virtue of being undead.
“That is Baldwin!” called another female voice.
He didn’t need to turn to know they were looking and gesturing at him. What’s more, they had the full attention of three of the watchmen, even as one held the door open and two more carried Sidon inside.
A soft arm draped itself around Baldwin’s neck, and an affectionate voice cooed in his ear.
“Baldwin, are you on leave from the Army? Come here just to see us again, love?”
“Army?” It was Chuck’s voice this time, speaking from the other side of Sidon’s body, which Brunn had set down in the street. “I thought you were- ”
“Plan B,” Baldwin said. It wasn’t a yell, but he spoke loudly enough to be heard by all those around him.
“Plan wha- ” The whore began.
Then Baldwin’s hand had hold of her throat.
Subtlety had never been his strong suit.