Chapter 129 129: Change (4)
"…I have nothing to do with the prophecy?"
"I don't know exactly what that prophecy is, but I can assure you of one thing—you have nothing to do with it."
In truth, I could roughly guess. Something about Arlene or the Twenty-Fifth Bam, perhaps.
It was uncertain speculation—but if there was one thing I could say with certainty, it was this:
Baekya had nothing to do with that prophecy from the beginning.
Like me, she was a being that should not have existed.
She and I were of the same kind.
Belonging to nothing.
Bound by nothing.
Capable of anything.
That was what we were—and what we should be.
"More than anything, I hate being forced. Whatever it is, you should do what you want. I want you to do what you want. What do you think?"
"…I don't know."
"Then how about coming with me?"
Even at my second question, she hesitated.
But less than before.
Her eyes wavered restlessly, then as if making a decision, she lowered her head and stepped forward, grabbing my hand firmly.
Ah. If Mascheny finds out about this, I'm dead.
I shook her hand once as if sealing a deal, then quickly let go and stepped back.
"…I have not decided yet. Whether to burn this body for the prophecy, or to… follow your words. But one thing I have decided. I will accept your proposal to walk together."
I answered her with a smile.
Everything would be her own decision.
I could only suggest, never force.
There could be no coercion.
"…Then it seems decided."
Thud!
With that, Baekya stomped her foot.
The entire space trembled, and a formation began to draw itself upon the water beneath us.
Hum— Hum— Hum—
Three circles formed around us.
When the formations ripened, Baekya clasped her hands and began chanting in an unknown language.
"მე, მომაბეზრებელი თეთრი მზე, ამ მაგიის ქვეშ ვფიცავ…"
With each sentence, ancient runes etched in the formation glowed, and that light reflected back onto Baekya.
I watched blankly until "Power" nudged my side.
"Do not stand there in a daze. This is only the beginning."
"…What's left now?"
"Heh. Did I not tell you before? Or was it that blacksmith?"
He pointed at my head, then my chest.
"You will change. I told you. So did the blacksmith. If you do not wish to become like the Ten Family Heads, you had best stay sharp."
"…."
I had thought about that from the start.
Even if I proved my qualification.
Even if I persuaded Baekya.
There remained the greatest problem.
The loss of humanity.
As my face tightened with tension, Power smiled sweetly.
"It is not entirely a bad thing. Is it not natural that the further you stray from humanity, the stronger you become?"
"That's backward."
I pursue strength to protect what I have.
If I throw it all away, what's the point of being strong?
His temptation held no value to me.
Power, usually so playful, now looked at me differently.
"…Is that your choice?"
"Yes."
"…Heh. I asked something unnecessary. Very well. I am you. If that is what you desire, I will help with everything."
He turned toward Baekya.
"Baekya, do you understand my will?"
"I understand."
Their exchange flowed too naturally—like old acquaintances.
Before I could question it, Power drew his sword and carved a massive formation around us.
His formation connected with Baekya's, forming a new sigil.
"Then we begin."
"Yes. Let us begin."
Thud—
Power stomped his foot as well.
White light poured from him, illuminating the surroundings.
That light connected with Baekya's, and the two shone as one.
The formation beneath my feet grew even more intricate.
Both Power and Baekya spoke at once.
[We are your power. Your blade. A part of you.]
[I, Baekya, consent to unity with my master Hoaqin.]
[I declare the beginning of the final Revolution.]
"…What?"
A familiar word—yet strangely out of place.
Before I could question it, the ocean swallowed us whole.
Splaash—
.
.
.
.
The blue-black waters of the sea sank me.
How long passed?
It did not feel long.
"…The sea. My inner world."
I had reached the deepest part of myself.
Neither sinking nor rising.
Suspended.
But this was no time to linger.
Just like when Edwaru first sent me here—
Baekya was pierced through my chest once more.
Radiating white brilliance.
From the hilt of Baekya, thin lines—like veins or roots—emerged.
They crawled along the blade, then reached toward me.
The moment they touched my body—
A shock surged through me.
A connection.
These lines were the link between Baekya's soul and mine.
Through them, she began to fuse with me.
Shrrrk—
Something immense merged with me.
My mind was forced to acknowledge it.
The power that already overflowed within me surged even further.
What I felt was ecstasy.
Joy.
Pleasure.
The thrill of accepting unimaginable strength.
The urge to shatter everything I could see exploded within me.
Without realizing it, I was smiling madly.
Yes.
This was abnormal.
But so what?
This overwhelming power was flowing into me.
All of it—mine.
I didn't want to lose this pleasure.
I wanted to savor this feast of strength forever.
Shinsoo rushed through my body at breakneck speed.
It was uncontrollable.
Ah—
To fight forever.
To destroy forever.
To indulge in this rapture forever.
The power kept increasing.
No—more explosively than before.
It wasn't even finished yet.
I wanted it all.
This was the greatest sensation.
My body began to darken.
Wait—
Something like this happened on the 96th floor, didn't it?
What was it again—
Ah. I don't remember.
And I don't care.
It doesn't matter.
Shrrrk—
I could feel it.
The frailty of life.
Pitiful beings who cannot even reach the 134th floor despite sacrificing everything.
And even if they do, they must spend eternity worrying about survival.
How tragic.
But I am different.
I am not one of the insects bound by the limits of this Tower.
This power.
This ecstasy.
How many beings could live enjoying this forever?
I can feel them.
Others like me scattered throughout the Tower.
One on the 100th floor.
One on the 134th.
Nine elsewhere.
Eleven in total.
Excluding Administrators, only these eleven could claim the same "class" as me.
Shrrrk—
More.
Just a little more power.
More power.
More ecstasy.
If I have this, nothing else matters. I want to savor this rapture forever.
What did I have before?
No matter how I try to remember, searing pain blocks the memory.
A dreadful pain I do not wish to endure.
I prefer pleasure over pain.
I don't need anything els—
…Wait.
"...?"
No.
No, something's wrong.
This isn't what I wanted.
What I wanted—what I desperately longed for—was in my memories.
The influx of power slows.
The surging ecstasy settles.
It leaves behind a sticky, unpleasant sensation.
But something else matters more.
What was it I wanted?
Crackle—
"…Ugh."
I try to peer into the depths of my memory, but a violent resistance strikes me down.
It wasn't this deep before.
The more I try to remember, the worse the headache becomes.
An indescribable pain spreads through my body.
As if something is bluntly warning me:
Do not dig any deeper.
When told not to, I want to even more.
Crackle—
"GRAAAH!"
I scream and dive deeper into my consciousness.
My memory—there is something important buried there.
Now it's stubbornness.
I have to see it.
Crackle—
My entire body feels torn apart.
The backlash is so intense it feels like my brain might shatter.
But I don't die.
That's enough.
As long as I don't die, I can continue.
If I keep going, I'll reach it.
"GRAAAH!"
Crack—
From the very bottom of my consciousness, I rip out a memory buried in black sludge.
The moment I succeed—
I realize what I had forgotten.
"…Mascheny."
The instant everything returns, regret and fury crash over me like a tidal wave.
I can't even lift my head in shame.
I kissed her.
I made grand promises.
And I was about to abandon her—
Abandon my family, my friends—
For this pathetic pleasure of power.
Unbelievable.
This power—
This ecstasy—
It's nothing but a cursed temptation.
Worse than useless.
I form a blade from shinsoo.
The only way—
Cut the link.
Sever the channel through which the power keeps pouring in.
If I accept any more—
Humanity won't survive.
Just as I raise my arm to bring the blade down—
A voice echoes for the first time in this space.
[Do you really have to cut it? Must you give it up?]
"…?"
Someone identical to me stands before me.
Power…?
Or another version of myself?
It doesn't matter.
He speaks with fervor.
[I know better than anyone how desperately you tried to escape pain.]
He rolls up his sleeve, revealing scarred wrists.
He spills out the drugs I once injected into myself.
[You slit your wrists to die. You overdosed to forget. For a hundred years!]
[Do you really think you'll be happy at the end? That this brief happiness will last forever? You'll be miserable again! As long as your humanity remains, you'll suffer again! Next time it won't be a hundred years. It'll be a thousand. Ten thousand!]
"It's different now. I won't run anymore. I have something to hold onto."
[Ah, your beloved Mascheny? You think she'll be safe? She'll die because of you. Miserably. Tragically! And she won't even resent you—that will make it worse!]
[Your so-called support? It'll snap in the next storm. And then what will you do?]
His rage fades, replaced by a calm voice.
[Pain only exists as long as humanity does. Cut away that unnecessary humanity and you won't feel pain. You'll live forever in that rapture from before. Like the Ten Family Heads. Like Zahard. No—greater than them. They couldn't discard everything. But you can.]
[Throw that memory back into the depths. Don't abandon the transfer of power. You can surpass the Ten Family Heads. You don't have to suffer anymore. That power alone will give you overwhelming exaltation. Let's live in happiness. Choose comedy over tragedy.]
[Hmm?]
"...."
My hand trembles.
I cannot bring the blade down.
The sword droops.
My arm falls limp.
The shinsu blade disperses into nothing.
The other "me" smiles brightly.
I step toward him.
One step at a time.
"I finally understand what you are."
"You are my fear."
[…Yes. I am your fear. Your hidden truth. Everything I say comes from the darkest parts of your unconscious. My very existence proves you're afraid.]
"Yeah. I'm afraid."
Of the two family members I miraculously regained—losing them again.
Of someone like Reblier appearing while I'm gone.
I'm happy now.
And that makes it scarier.
Sometimes I thought—
This happiness was just preparation for greater tragedy.
For deeper misery.
For worse pain.
"No matter how many times I swore to myself, I thought I would lose everything again."
Even when I became Mascheny's lover—
Even while smiling playfully on the surface—
I was always afraid.
That Zahard's army would arrive tomorrow.
That my tragedy would spread to her.
[Exactly! I'm sick of it! I just want happiness like everyone else. I don't care if the direction's wrong anymore. I'm tired of pain. So please—!]
[Accept the power. Be free from every torment. Reign over the Tower like them!]
He looks pathetic.
Desperate.
But he is undeniably—
Me.
At the very bottom lay a mass of negative emotions.
Fear. Anxiety. Dread.
The "me" formed from those tightly wound feelings—that was the being before me.
So instead of rejecting him, I accepted him.
"I'm sorry."
[…]
"What you're offering… isn't the happiness I want. You know that."
[…I know. But—]
"Was what I wanted really too much? I never had any grand ambition to fulfill some great cause. Absolute good? Justice? Everyone's happiness? You know I don't care about any of that."
I stopped right in front of my Fear and looked him straight in the eyes.
"I just want my people—those I love, my family, my friends—to be happy. Just us. Was that really such an excessive wish? Answer me."
[…We have power. The happiness of those around us… shouldn't be too much to ask. And yet why… why is even that so hard to protect?]
Fear's true feelings surfaced.
And those were my true feelings too.
His voice trembled, almost whining, almost crying.
"…Yeah. It's not too much. It's not excessive. We can achieve it. We will."
I smiled at him.
It was almost forced—but I smiled anyway.
"I won't say irresponsibly that everything will be happy from now on. Maybe you're right. Maybe happiness is just foreshadowing for tragedy. Even so…"
Just as I had done with Baekya, I extended my hand.
"Let's swallow a little more pain. Endure a little longer."
"Our story—my story—will be a comedy written as tragedy. Hardship and trials are just foreshadowing for a happy ending."
"I will make it so."
[…Endure more pain? You really say cruel things.]
[…But I can't accuse you of speaking lightly. You are me.]
[…You are me—but I am also you. If you've decided, I will follow. But are you truly prepared not to regret it?]
"If I lose everything again… I might look back at this moment and regret it."
"But even that regret—I will accept it as the path I chose."
[Hah.]
Fear's expression had completely changed.
He even smiled faintly, as if resigned.
He grasped my hand.
[What do you wish to become? No—what are you?]
"The greatest being in this sea—my inner world."
Behind me, my essence began to take shape.
"A being strong enough to endure most pain without breaking."
"The freest being, able to travel anywhere in this vast sea."
"A being that isn't swept away by waves—and cannot be shaken by them."
"To my people, devoted. To my enemies, ruthless."
Ruuuumble—
From the dark abyssal sea, a massive white whale emerged.
Its enormous body, bathed in moonlight, gleamed brilliantly.
[…That is…?]
"Yes."
The concrete embodiment of my essence.
The apex species of this sea.
The freest lifeform within it.
Behind me swam a white whale larger than mountains, freely traversing the vast ocean.
That was my image.
My manifested self.
I will not be forced by anything.
I will not be swept away by waves.
My course is mine alone.
I decide everything.
I carve a new path, separate from fate.
For everything I desire.
Fear disappeared.
In his place stood Power.
He burst into laughter.
[Hahaha! This is insane! In a Tower where every fate is predetermined—in this fishbowl containing a sea—you would carve a new sea route?!]
"Yes. An uncharted sea. Waves no one has crossed. If no one has walked that path, then pain is only natural. Even so—that is the route I will sail."
Which meant—
This power trying to steal my humanity was no longer needed.
Instead of cutting the link, I grabbed the sword embedded in my chest and ripped it out entirely.
An overwhelming sense of exhaustion washed over me.
But the soul fusion was already complete.
There might be side effects—but it was fine.
Crack—crack—
My mental world began collapsing.
Power kept laughing and applauding.
[Splendid! I love that answer! The final Revolution—the fusion with Baekya—is now complete! Her power, her soul, her realization—you are qualified to claim it all!]
Crack—
Unable to withstand the collapse, my inner world shattered.
Every mystical subspace I had passed through crumbled.
Ruuuuuumble—
....
Ashul Edwaru's Forge
Rumble—
"…?!"
Edwaru leapt to his feet.
It wasn't entirely sudden—because deafening tremors were shaking the entire forge without warning.
"What… is this…?"
Even Edwaru stammered in visible shock.
No one was there to witness such a rare sight.
Flash—
"Ghk—!"
A blinding white light flooded the forge.
Perhaps the brightest light this Tower had ever seen.
It came from the furnace where the boy lay.
"Impossible!"
Edwaru rushed to the furnace and peered inside.
Hoaqin should have been there.
But it was empty.
Frowning, he instinctively looked up.
"…What are you…?"
The boy hovered above.
His appearance had changed drastically.
The wave of shinsoo radiating from him was overwhelming.
A crimson marking crossed his eyes.
His attire was new—black, red, and white interwoven.
And upon his head rested a larger, more beautiful red-and-white crown.
The boy glanced at himself, then looked at Edwaru.
And, as always—
He smiled faintly.
"I feel a little sleepy… but refreshed."
Thus began the true birth of Arie Hoaquin—
The Irregular who would one day bring "pioneering" to the Tower.