Knotting His Rejected Breeder

RAMON’S POV

She was clearly mad, and irritated by my question, yet I didn’t give up. Her body tensed in my arms, the sudden stiffness a clear sign of the storm brewing beneath her calm exterior.

I pressed further, wanting an answer that would calm me down. My hand remained on her back, rubbing slow circles even as my mind raced with doubts I couldn’t fully silence. The need for reassurance burned in my chest, a desperate hunger for words that would quiet the voices in my head.

She cried, and kept on crying. The sobs shook her shoulders, quiet at first but growing heavier, her face buried against my chest as the tears soaked into my shirt.

I stroked her hair in my body, not letting her go, the soft strands slipping through my fingers like silk. The warmth of her body against mine should have been comforting, but it only heightened the conflict raging inside me, the doubt twisting like a knife.

When she was done crying, she lifted her head, and pulled away from me. Her eyes were red-rimmed, her cheeks flushed, but there was a determination in her gaze that made me pause. She wiped at her face with the back of her hand, her breathing still shaky but steadier now.

"So, are you ready to answer my questions now?"

"Fine," she said much to my surprise. "But first, you have to tell me the inspiration behind these sudden accusatory questions. I need to know who has been slandering my name," she said, her voice steady now, though her hands still trembled slightly in her lap.

I thought long and hard about her request. Anyone I mentioned would immediately create an enmity. The thought of Jenner or Ivy facing Lorena’s wrath made my stomach twist, a fresh wave of protectiveness rising in my chest. The last thing I needed was more conflict in an already fractured pack.

I didn’t want that to happen, but I also wanted her to answer my question.

Carefully, I lifted her chin, until she was looking at me directly in my eyes. Her skin was warm under my fingers, soft and familiar, but the trust in her gaze felt fragile, like it could shatter at any moment. The vulnerability there made my chest ache, a reminder of how much was at stake.

"You do know this is serious, right? I’m trying to walk on eggshells because of your condition, but put yourself in my position. Hazel just confirmed he betrayed me. He said there wasn’t any need for me to do any research, because he did what he was accused of. Do you see why I need to be cautious about the people around me? I just need to know if you’ll ever betray, or have ever betrayed me. That’s all."

It wasn’t such a difficult question to answer, was it?

Her insistence on avoiding, or deflecting had me second-guessing her. The hesitation in her eyes, the way she bit her lip slightly, made my wolf stir with unease, a low growl building in my chest that I forced down.

I didn’t want to side with the popular opinion, but if she couldn’t even give me a straightforward answer, how was I supposed to protect her from everything everyone accused her of doing? The doubt gnawed at me, sharp and persistent, making my jaw clench.

She sighed, and took a deep breath, then suddenly smiled. The expression was bright, almost too bright, like a mask slipping into place. Her eyes softened, the earlier irritation fading as she cupped my face in her hands, her touch warm and steady.

"I think I understand you better now. When you asked initially, it felt like you didn’t trust me enough. But I understand you," she cupped my face into her face, and her smile widened. "I’m loyal to you Ramon. I have been loyal to you since the day I stepped into your pack. I’m also carrying your child. How could I have ever, or ever think of betraying you?"

I began to feel relieved. That was all I wanted to hear. I just wanted to hear her say she could never betray me. The words settled over me like a balm, easing some of the tension in my shoulders even as a small voice in the back of my mind whispered doubts.

"Swear it on your life," I said, and her hand fell from my face. The sudden loss of her touch felt colder than it should have, a small chill that made my skin prickle.

I could sense the fear that racked her, but just as soon as I sniffed it, it was gone. Her eyes widened for a fraction of a second, a flicker of something dark crossing her expression before it smoothed out again. The brief hesitation made my wolf stir again, restless and uneasy.

What was that about? Could I still not trust her, despite what she had made me believe? The question lingered, heavy and uncomfortable, making my wolf pace restlessly inside me.

My head was all jumbled with different voices screaming to be heard. The conflicting opinions from Jenner, Ivy, Blane, and now Hazel’s confession—all of it pressed down on me, a cacophony I couldn’t fully silence.

"I swear with my life. I would never betray you. Could you stop being paranoid now? You’re scaring me and your child."

I indeed stopped being paranoid. She had calmed my fears. She had sworn with her life. Nothing else mattered but her words. The relief washed over me, warm and steady, pushing the doubts to the back of my mind for now. Her hand returned to mine, squeezing gently, her touch a small anchor in the storm.

"I’m going to be merciless to anyone who crosses or betrays me again. I would hate for you to be caught in the crossfire. That’s why I wanted to be sure where you stood. Hope you understand me?"

She laughed playfully. "Of course I do. You know I’ll always understand you. If not me, who else will?"

"Good. I’m glad you understand me. Come here."

I pulled her into my body, and just held her in that position. Her warmth seeped into me, her head resting against my chest as her breathing steadied.

It could have been Sonia.

The thought crept up on me even before I could stop it. The image of her in my arms, her laugh soft in my ear, flashed unbidden, making my chest tighten with a pain I couldn’t name.

But now that the thought was out there, I had to analyse it.

If she had sworn loyalty to me exactly how Lorena did, we could have been the ones in this position. The thought of Sonia’s smile, her quiet strength, her body pressed against mine by the river—it all came rushing back, sharp and painful.

However, she had shamed me, and destroyed every bit of desire I had for the both of us to ever be together. The memory of her turning away, her voice cold and final, still burned like a fresh brand on my skin.

"You’re lying," a loud voice in my head screamed. The doubt was persistent, a constant whisper that refused to fade completely.

I couldn’t care less what anyone, even my wolf thought.

Sonia was off my mind forever. Not even the moon goddess could make me want her back.

When the next full moon came, and she couldn’t hide her desire for her mate, I hope she never thinks of contacting me.

I would ruin every bit of self esteem she must have managed to gather. The thought brought a dark satisfaction, a small release from the pain she had caused.

"What are you thinking about?" Lorena suddenly asked me, her voice soft but probing as she lifted her head from my chest.

My heart skipped a beat at the boldness of my thoughts.

I had one woman in my body, but I was thinking about another in my heart. The guilt twisted in my gut, sharp and unwelcome, making my muscles tense beneath her touch.

"Sums up both relationships," that same stubborn voice persisted.

I closed my eyes tight, and didn’t open it until I had managed to evacuate that rebellious voice. The silence in my mind felt fragile, like it could shatter at any moment.

"What are you thinking about?" I felt a gentle nudge, and opened my eyes.

"Nothing, why?" I questioned back, forcing a small smile as I met her gaze.

"Don’t lie to me. Your muscles are so tense. It’s as if whatever you just thought about, had the ability to make you murderous. Was it Hazel? Are you still so sure someone is not setting him up, despite what he told you?" She asked, her hand resting lightly on my arm, her touch warm and steady.

I paused to examine her question. She did indeed have a point. I couldn’t deny I had thought of that too.

I’m glad I wasn’t the only one willing to give Hazel the benefit of doubt.

Even though deep down, my instincts told me he couldn’t have been acting with how maniacal he sounded.

I just still had the urge to give him some grace, because I had nurtured him myself. The memory of the boy I had raised, all bones and wide eyes, made the betrayal cut deeper, a slow burn that refused to fade.

"You’ve grown really weak, Ramon," the cousin of that rebellious voice raised its ugly voice in my head.

But were they wrong? My mind was definitely not as sharp anymore, and I was quite affected by that fact. The constant doubt, the blurred lines between truth and lies, made me feel less like the alpha I once was.

"I think we’d need to wait and see how everything plays out. I won’t be giving him any grace until then," I said, my voice steadier than I felt.

"Well you’re the alpha, and I trust in your infinite wisdom. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise."

I smiled with pride, because she had just reminded me why she was here right now, and not anyone else. The words wrapped around me like a warm blanket, easing some of the tension in my shoulders.

"Thank you," I muttered in my mind, and closed my eyes.