Chapter 1: It’s Lights Out And Away We Go
The morning light filters through my blinds, catching dust motes in its beam, innocent, unlike what I'm doing beneath my sheets.
I'm hunched over in my bedroom, hand working frantically while Mom's silky black panties stretch over my cock.
I got up at 5:30 AM just to raid her hamper, a ritual I've perfected many times over the past year. The fabric is still warm, still smells like her. God, I hate myself for this.
"This is the last time," I whisper, like I've whispered a hundred times before. But today, it might actually be true. First day of college. Fresh start. No more being the weird, quiet kid from Orono High who's too awkward to make friends.
No more being the kid who's in love with his own Mother.
I stifle a groan as I picture her face, those piercing blue eyes that seem to see right through me at the breakfast table. The way her white hair falls across her shoulders when she bends to kiss my forehead. How her body curves in all the places that make my mouth go dry when she walks around in her robe on Sunday mornings.
"Fuck," I breathe, bucking my hips upward. The shame burns hot, but not hot enough to stop me. Never hot enough to stop me.
Mom raised me alone after Dad split. Eighteen years of just us. Just Angela and Gabriel against the world. She worked so hard, all those overtime hours she put in. The way she'd come home exhausted. How she always had enough money for my science camp tuitions despite our modest means.
I'm close now, thinking about how she held me last night. "My college boy," she'd said, hugging me tight enough that I could feel every inch of her pressed against me. The way she looked at me.
God, I wish I could fuck her, even just once.
I bite my lip hard as the pressure builds, a volcano about to erupt. When it hits, it's overwhelming.