Chapter 376: Yes, Chef!
"Understood!" Jianheng yelled back, eagerly adjusting his footing and launching a devastating uppercut into the tree trunk.
Wen Shiru, the calculating, luxury-obsessed Fox, was currently doing rapid, continuous, one-armed pushups in a puddle of highly toxic, glowing blue muck.
His silver spectacles were taped to his head with a piece of torn silk, and he was muttering rapid-fire mercantile equations under his breath to maintain his rhythm.
"Three hundred and two... the compounding interest of physical exertion yields a net positive return on Qi-circulation... three hundred and three... pain is merely the currency of ascension!" Shiru gasped, sweat pouring down his pale face.
Even the Azure Crane maidens had abandoned their delicate, flowing water-silk aesthetics. Fairy Xue had tied her robes up around her thighs, abandoned her veil, and was currently bear-hugging a massive, moss-covered boulder, furiously executing deep, burning squats while screaming motivational quotes at her two junior sisters.
’They have completely lost their minds,’ Ji’an’s internal monologue cackled, taking another leisurely sip of her tea. ’I turned the continent’s most elite, snobby prodigies into a cult of gym bros. This is the greatest sociological experiment I have ever conducted.’
It was hilarious, but it was also incredibly effective.
Because they had abandoned their egos, they no longer complained when Ji’an issued absurd, brutal commands. In fact, they practically begged for them.
"Alright, listen up, you masochistic meatheads!" Ji’an announced two hours later, her amplified voice echoing over the humid, creeping miasma.
The disciples instantly snapped to attention, dropping their boulders and sleds, staring up at her palm-leaf yacht with wide, eager eyes.
Ji’an pointed her heavy iron ladle toward a dense, shadowy thicket of thorny vines deeper in the valley.
"We are out of bear meat, and my spatial ring is running low on high-tier protein!" Ji’an declared. "The scouts report a nest of Rank 6 Venom-Horned Rhinos in that thicket. They possess incredibly thick, armored hides that resist spiritual blades. Normally, you would use piercing spells."
She smirked, twirling the ladle.
"Today, you are using your fists. I want three rhinos. I want them subdued entirely through blunt-force trauma and grappling techniques! If I see a single spark of sword aura or elemental magic, the offender is on dish-washing duty for a month!"
Normally, telling a group of swordsmen to suplex a venomous, heavily armored rhinoceros would result in a mutiny.
Today, it resulted in a terrifying, bloodthirsty battle cry.
"YES, CHEF!" the disciples roared in unison.
Hu Yanlie, the feral Beast Lord, didn’t even wait for the dismissal. He tore his shredded green tunic completely off his body, tossing it into the mud, and sprinted headlong into the thicket, howling with unadulterated primal joy. "I CALL THE ALPHA! NO ONE TOUCHES THE ALPHA!"
"Do not break formation, you feral brute!" Jianheng yelled, sprinting after him, his fists raised in a textbook boxer’s guard. "We strike the joints! Destabilize their center of gravity!"
For the next forty-five minutes, Ji’an sat comfortably on her yacht, snacking on dried lotus seeds, watching the absolute, comedic chaos unfold in the thicket.
It was like watching a choreographed, incredibly expensive wrestling match.
She watched Lu Jianheng, the elegant, aloof heir of the Sword Peak, literally put a three-ton venom-rhino into a flawless, textbook headlock, his face red with exertion as he wrestled the beast into the mud.
She watched Gu Zhiwei execute a flying dropkick from the canopy, tackling another rhino by the horns.
"Shiru! Don’t just stand there calculating the hide’s market value! Sweep the legs!" Ji’an yelled through her lotus-leaf megaphone.
"I am assessing the optimal leverage point, Chef!" Shiru yelled back, before launching himself into the fray, utilizing a surprisingly vicious judo-throw to flip a charging beast onto its back.
By the time they dragged the three unconscious, heavily bruised rhinos back to the camp, the prodigies looked like they had been dragged backward through a swamp. They were covered in mud, rhino-spit, and bruises.
But their eyes were shining with the fierce, undeniable light of stabilized, expanding power.
"Excellent work, boys," Ji’an praised, tossing a set of butcher knives down from the yacht. "Now, skin them. Zechuan and I will handle the primal cuts. We’re having braised rhino shank for lunch."
***
The relentless, grueling cycle of manual labor and high-calorie feasting continued into the late afternoon.
As they marched deeper into the miasma territory, the fog shifted from a sickly green to a deep, bubbling, highly corrosive shade of violet.
The vegetation grew sparse, replaced by bubbling pits of thick, viscous, foul-smelling mud.
Elder Viper, who had been floating silently alongside Ji’an’s yacht all day, raised his glowing staff.
"Halt," the poison master hissed. "We have reached the Purple-Blight Swamps. The mud here is saturated with the essence of a thousand decayed venomous beasts. The ambient toxicity will seep directly through your pores. To linger here is to invite your internal organs to liquefy."
The disciples paused, wiping the sweat from their brows, eyeing the bubbling, noxious purple mud pits with a healthy dose of caution.
Ji’an, however, sat up on her yacht, her silver-flecked eyes widening with intense, sadistic inspiration.
’Toxicity seeping through the pores,’ Ji’an’s brain calculated rapidly. ’If the body is forced to constantly expel a highly lethal external toxin, the internal filtration system, the Golden Core must operate at maximum overclocked speeds. It’s like stress-testing a server by flooding it with malware. It will force their immune-Qi to evolve.’
Ji’an stood up on the edge of the palm leaf, looking down at the sweaty, exhausted group of disciples.
"Drop your sleds," Ji’an commanded, her voice dropping into a quiet, terrifying register of absolute authority.
The disciples immediately dropped their burdens, standing at attention.
Ji’an pointed her spatula directly at the largest, most violently bubbling, foul-smelling pit of corrosive purple mud.
"New training directive," Ji’an announced, an evil, villainous smirk curling her lips. "You are going to cultivate. In the mud over there today."
A beat of complete, bewildered silence fell over the group.