Chapter 78: Raw Desire
ANASTASIA
My tiptoes were on his shoes, my hands all over his muscular neck as I desperately tried to bring him closer to me to taste his lips more.
All this hunger.
It’s not mine because it was too much for me to handle. The way I kissed Zade was too raw and needy, like I had been waiting my whole life for this moment.
I was clumsy and uncertain, but Zade just let me take the wheel as I ravaged his mouth like I was under starvation.
The sparks tingling my whole body were unlike anything I had ever felt, and as they just went on like electricity racing across my veins, shooting up to my spine to the back of my head, it was surreal.
Like being stuck in a moment you never want to end.
His hot mouth only added more conflict, more need, and more madness to consume.
No...
I pulled my mouth away, moist with saliva and on fire, my breath rough and uneven.
What am I... what am I doing? I shouldn’t—!
"Stopping so soon?"
My trembling gaze moved to him, his chest rising and falling hard beneath my palm. He looked... affected. As if what I had done was the breaking point.
"We were just getting to the good part."
I gasped when he picked me up and sat me on the bench. He forced my legs apart and stepped between them, heat swallowing my pussy.
Slowly, he raised my leg, and I was forced to arch backwards, my hands braced on the bench. Thanks to my flexibility, my leg was high up in the air.
I drew in a sharp breath as his calloused hand grazed my flesh.
"You’re not wearing your anklet. Why?"
I lost my voice, still in shock about doing something as crazy as kissing him. I didn’t understand why I did such a thing, despite my fury towards him, despite the pain eating me from the inside out. It didn’t make sense why it felt so right to kiss him.
What’s happening to me?
Until a few days ago, I thought I was going insane, but this was far from insanity. I might as well be losing a part of myself. Like, I don’t own my body anymore, that’s scarier!
"You shouldn’t have taken it off..." he continued, his dark gaze searing into mine.
My body flushed instantly at the possibility of punishment, and I wanted to punch myself in the gut for having such a nasty thought.
Zade released my leg, and without breaking eye contact, his hands glided into my chemise, hooking his fingers at my panties and pulling them off effortlessly, and shoved them in his back pocket.
My heart thundered like a storm raging overhead when he inclined to me, resting his hands at either side so close to my hand I could feel the heat emitting from them.
"You want me so badly, Anastasia."
My breath hitched. He rarely used my name, and hearing it now carried more meaning.
No Ana, no!
Don’t let your body steer the wheels. Use your fucking head!
I’m nothing but Annabeth’s replacement. I’m just a property he purchased for whatever sick reasons.
For all I knew, he could have done these things with Annabeth, touch her this way, said things to her. All kinds of things.
I thought back to the pictures, the one where he was so close to kissing her, and another where he held her waist in the same possessiveness he did mine.
"You’re wrong." I found my voice. "I don’t want you."
Our noses touched, and suddenly my body felt like it was under possession, and it took everything not to peel my hands off the bench and rest them on those broad shoulders.
I had never fought such an internal battle, and I didn’t know if I had the strength to keep fighting, let alone endure.
But I had to... dear God, I had to.
"Yes you do, little kitten. Fight it all you want, it won’t change a thing."
"I don’t want you!" I seethed at his face, tapping into my rage before it was the only power I had against him. "Everything about you makes me sick. Every time I look at you, I feel like stabbing you and filling your body with holes. I fucking hate you."
He let out a laugh, and my heart raced at such an unhinged sound. It disturbed me the same way it made me reconsider everything I said because nothing seemed to be getting through that thick skull of his.
Was I not convincing enough?
"Do you usually kiss men you’re supposedly sick of like you’re on the verge of starvation?" His gaze held mine in a way I couldn’t look away.
"T-That was—"
"Do you come all over their pants and get drenched like a needy slut?"
"There is only one man I—!"
"Don’t you dare." He cut me off, all amusement drained away.
"Jacob is—"
He snatched my jaw before I had the chance to finish those words, and I’m mortified by how my pussy pulsed at the skin contact.
"The only man that’s ever gonna get that pussy wet is me." He growled at my face. "The only man you’re gonna ever think of is me... me."
I glared holes at him, ignoring how my heart raced faster than anything I could think of.
"You don’t own me."
"I’m all for proving my point, kitten. Because the moment I touch that wet pussy of yours, you’re gonna fucking beg me to cum."
"I-I won’t."
"Even if I fuck you right now against this bench?"
My stomach dropped at his comment, and I could see the wild desire ignite in his green eyes, torching up my mind.
I sucked in breath when his nails sank into my ass and brought me close until I could feel the hardness of his bulge right at my pussy.
There was no barrier, except his jeans.
"Your silence is making me think you want exactly that." His lips touched my neck, and my eyes fluttered shut despite my resistance.
Heat surged through me, betraying every attempt to pull away.
"Isn’t that right, kitten?"