Chapter 182 : If You Die, You Become Shit
Chapter 182: If You Die, You Become Shit
During this visit, the room that the Namgung Clan had given to Yul Han was located deep within the Inner Courtyard.
It was because they intended to keep it tightly hidden, not wanting to reveal to the outside world that the Bright Cult’s Vice Cult Leader was staying at the Namgung Clan.
There was also a justification.
The room they had given him had once been used as the residence of Namgung Hee-yeon.
Perhaps because of that, Yul Han also shut himself deep inside without any complaints, just as the Namgung Clan wanted.
Rather, Yul Han felt comfortable in the room where her faint scent still lingered.
Because of that, rather than feeling like he was alone in the middle of the uncomfortable Orthodox Sects, it even felt as if he was sitting together with her at Seogak.
Perhaps for that reason, Yul Han liked sitting quietly in the room with his eyes closed, imagining her life here.
As he was enjoying his own time like that, the Namgung Clan Head came to see him.
“I seem to have disturbed the Vice Cult Leader’s peaceful time.”
“No, not at all. I was merely closing my eyes out of boredom.”
They sat facing each other with smiles; the conversation was smooth.
After all, Yul Han was someone who used honorifics regardless of the other party’s status, and from the Namgung Clan Head’s perspective—having been saved—there was no way he wouldn’t feel personally grateful.
“I heard that you dislike beating around the bush, so I will speak frankly.”
“I am listening.”
As Yul Han nodded, the Namgung Clan Head spoke.
“To be honest, I oppose the marriage you proposed.”
Watching Yul Han’s expression subtly stiffen at his words, the Namgung Clan Head noticed something peculiar.
At a glance, what appeared on the Vice Cult Leader’s face was clearly murderous intent filled with anger.
But upon closer inspection, he could see that there was an extremely faint trace of disappointment mixed in.
In other words, if one removed the overflowing killing intent that seemed to spill out even when he stood still, the Vice Cult Leader’s current expression was simply one of light disappointment.
‘Is this it? The reason why people of the Bright Cult act so boldly even in front of the Vice Cult Leader who radiates such killing intent.’
Those who stayed in the Vice Cult Leader’s residence truly knew his real expressions.
That was why they could tell that behind that killing intent-filled face, he was actually smiling.
Just as he himself had now recognized the Vice Cult Leader’s disappointment.
Lost in his thoughts for a moment, the Clan Head was pulled back to reality by Yul Han’s voice.
“So, is this a final refusal?”
“As I said, honestly, considering the eyes of the Orthodox Faction, I would like to do so. However…”
“However?”
“I was told that if I did, someone would have to offer up his head. Our Great Elder, that is.”
The Great Elder of the Namgung Clan was the Azure Dragon Sword King.
< I will stake my life to protect it. >
That was the answer the Azure Dragon Sword King had given when Yul Han asked how the promise would be handled before heading to the Zhuge Clan.
As Yul Han recalled that, the Namgung Clan Head continued.
“I cannot allow such a thing to happen.”
“Then…?”
“I will… agree. However, I ask for your understanding that we cannot boast about it openly.”
“It won’t be something you can hide either, though.”
“We will invite several renowned figures of the Martial World and sects that are particularly close to Namgung to the wedding. However, we will not announce it openly to the world.”
“Will that make any difference?”
“Shame… You may scold me for saying something so futile, but from the Namgung Clan’s standpoint, we need to show some degree of caution.”
“You mean it is an act to show the other Orthodox Sects.”
“Yes. At the very least, they may point fingers, but we must ensure they do not become openly hostile.”
Yul Han understood the Namgung Clan Head’s feelings.
After all, he knew very well what it meant for someone of the Orthodox Faction to be cast out by other Orthodox sects.
Because once, he too had been part of the Orthodox Faction.
Though not under the name Yul Han, nor in this body.
In any case, that was why—
Yul Han nodded without resistance.
“The Golden Flower Manor will understand as well.”
Although his face still brimmed with killing intent, the Namgung Clan Head could tell once again.
The Vice Cult Leader was genuinely accepting it.
With that, the conversation ended, and Yul Han rose from his seat as if he had no further reason to stay.
“Are you leaving?”
“The matter is settled. The longer I stay, the less it benefits the Namgung Clan.”
Not fully understanding whether it was a remark of regret or consideration, the Namgung Clan Head escorted Yul Han out and cautiously brought up the words he had been hesitating over until the very end.
“I heard you are keeping her only in Seogak.”
Yul Han stopped walking at those words.
“If you only intend to keep her there… could you not send her back?”
If one was not going to keep her, then returning her would be right.
Moreover, the Namgung Clan itself was directly asking for it.
But—
“Impossible!”
Yul Han’s voice fell coldly, and his figure scattered into the air as if dissolving into it.
Watching the Vice Cult Leader disappear with a method worthy of being called divine, the Namgung Clan Head’s expression grew heavy.
“…Ha.”
< I won’t go so far as to say you took the wrong first step. >
The words of the Azure Dragon Sword King kept digging into his heart.
“I did take the wrong step. Blinded by fame and profit, I sold my own family.”
He had always thought he lived on the edge of a blade.
Thus, he believed that every decision he made existed solely for the sake of the clan.
But after experiencing a despairing situation with no escape—a death he could not avoid—the world he saw had changed.
That was why he had quietly stepped back at the Azure Dragon Sword King’s vow.
In the past, even if it meant abandoning the Azure Dragon Sword King, he would never have accepted a marriage alliance with the Bright Cult.
Thinking about it now, his former self had not truly seen the world.
Just as he had only now begun to properly see the Vice Cult Leader’s true feelings behind his face.
“…I’ve lived a meaningless life.”
The Namgung Clan Head’s voice sounded strangely sorrowful.
After leaving the Namgung Clan, Yul Han stopped by Golden Flower Manor instead of returning directly to the Bright Cult.
He had, in effect, decided the marriage of their daughter on his own, so even if late, he thought he should inform the Golden Flower Manor Lord.
No—if he were honest, he did not yet have the confidence to face Namgung Hee-yeon directly.
Because with his own hands, he had blocked her chance to safely return to the Namgung Clan.
Carrying that heavy heart, Yul Han was warmly welcomed by the Golden Flower Manor Lord.
“Welcome. It has been far too long.”
“If my coming means anything, it usually means Golden Flower Manor is in danger. So perhaps it is better the fewer times we meet.”
“Then this time as well—!”
The Manor Lord tensed instantly, but Yul Han waved his hand.
“No. This time, I came to bring good news.”
“Good news?”
“Yes. In fact…”
As Yul Han continued, the Golden Flower Manor Lord looked quite surprised.
And how could he not be?
While maintaining ties with the Bright Cult, they were now entering a marriage alliance with a son of the Orthodox Faction.
“Are you saying the Namgung Clan truly agreed?”
“The Clan Head has ratified the Council of Elders’ decision. I confirmed it before coming here.”
Yul Han’s words were astonishing.
However, the Manor Lord did not look particularly pleased.
“…Have I caused unnecessary trouble?”
At Yul Han’s concerned question, the Manor Lord shook his head.
“N-No. The Namgung Clan is a powerful family within the Orthodox Faction, so how could it be bad? Moreover, this opens a path for trade with the Orthodox side, so for merchants like us, it is nothing but good news.”
“Then why does your expression…?”
“Ah! It is because I am worried. In truth, our Hwayeong had someone she liked.”
Yul Han’s expression turned awkward, as he knew that person was himself.
Seeing that expression, the Manor Lord immediately realized that the Vice Cult Leader already knew.
“You knew as well?”
“…I am sorry.”
There was no need to hear further.
Instead, the Manor Lord asked something else.
“Does our Hwayeong truly like the young master of the Namgung Clan?”
“There was a time when a young man named Namgung Chang-yeon stayed at Seogak. After he left, Lady Hwayeong sighed dozens of times a day while looking toward the east where the Namgung Clan resides.”
“Our Hwayeong did that?”
Yul Han smiled faintly at the surprised Manor Lord.
“She is straightforward. She does not know how to hide her feelings. I found that admirable.”
“I raised her too wildly. It is all my fault.”
In this era, for a woman to openly express her feelings was considered a fault.
Thus, even the parent who raised her that way bore guilt.
But Yul Han shook his head.
“No. You raised her well.”
“…What?”
“It is only recently that I have come to realize how difficult it is to be honest rather than hide and deceive. To live that way in all things means she has courage. You raised her well. I truly mean it.”
Hearing the sincerity in Yul Han’s voice, a smile appeared on the Manor Lord’s lips.
It was pride—his daughter had been acknowledged by someone as great as the Vice Cult Leader.
Unable to refuse the Manor Lord’s warm hospitality, Yul Han stayed the night at Golden Flower Manor.
In truth, he wanted to delay, even just a little, the moment he would have to face Namgung Hee-yeon.
That night, as they sat drinking together, the Manor Lord asked:
“It seems you have fallen for a woman.”
“…Pardon?”
Seeing Yul Han’s startled reaction, the Manor Lord continued.
“Do you realize that more than half of what you’ve said to me has been about Seogak?”
“Well, Lady Hwayeong stays at Seogak, so—”
“You barely spoke about Hwayeong. After that, it was all about someone else. Too many fallen leaves, hands too delicate to sweep them, a waist that bends too deeply in gratitude… Who is she? That woman.”
Yul Han could not hide his flustered expression.
The Manor Lord, who had never seen the Vice Cult Leader show his emotions so openly, smiled.
“There is a small wisdom one gains after living long enough. Would you like to hear it?”
“….”
Seeing Yul Han silently nod, he continued.
“If you cannot hide it, then do not hide it. If you cannot stop, then simply run toward it. No matter how long life seems, people eventually die. Do not guard your heart and body too tightly. When you die, you become shit, Vice Cult Leader.”
Though he ended it lightly like a joke, it did not sound light at all.
Perhaps because of that, Yul Han mulled over those words for quite some time.
Watching him, the Manor Lord raised his cup.
“The moon is beautiful, and the man deep in thought is dignified—what a fine night. Hahaha!”
His laughter was hearty as he drank.
Before that night ended, Yul Han returned to the Bright Cult.