Drive me Wild, Rival(BL)

Nico

Finally, I let it all out. The words I had been fiercely guarding ever since the Japan trip were finally out in the open, and for the first time in three days, I could actually breathe properly.

He knew how I felt about him now but, the sudden weight of the silence that followed made my heart pound even faster, hitting my ribs with a frantic, suffocating rhythm.

I couldn’t help but think that he probably hated me now.

What if he didn’t want to be anywhere near me? The terror of that thought clawed at my chest, because what the hell was I even supposed to do if he hated me?

For a long, grueling moment, Alaric said absolutely nothing.

The only sound echoing across the private beach was the rhythmic, booming roar of the sea crashing against the rocks below.

What the hell was he thinking? I couldn’t help but wonder, desperately searching his face. I looked into his eyes yet again, but even though he was staring straight at me, it felt like his focus was completely somewhere else—detached and processing an entirely different reality.

"Alaric..." I breathed.

"Seo-jun.’’

we both said at the exact same time.

The heavy tension cracked, and I let out a low chuckle. Hearing my birth name come out of his mouth, pronounced in his distinct, crisp tone, sounded incredibly strange yet completely right.

"Why the hell are you laughing?" he demanded immediately, his brow furrowing as he let out an insulted scoff.

"Oh, please," I chuckled again, watching him glare at me. I reached up, my hand lingering near his cheek. "Alright, I’m laughing because I find you really cute when you’re defensive. Happy now?"

Alaric rolled his eyes aggressively, but the flush on his cheeks deepened. He heaved another sharp sigh, shaking his head as he stared at me. "I can’t believe that you are Seo-jun. All these years... I had been searching for who that boy was, and it turned out to be you this entire time."

I froze, suddenly unsure of how to react to his words. The tone of his voice made it seem like he was completely fixated on the shock of the Seo-jun revelation alone, entirely bypassing my long confession of love.

A cold spike of terror hit my stomach. I was terrified that if I wasn’t careful enough, if I pushed too hard, he was going to reject me entirely.

"Seo-jun," Alaric muttered again, the name sounding heavier this time. "I should have known. The name is rare enough around Monaco, and yet..." He sighed deeply, his hazel eyes locking onto mine with a sudden, piercing intensity. "I didn’t realize that the person who had been by my side all along, pushing me, was Seo-jun. Why didn’t you tell me?"

Why?

I even wondered why I had kept it a secret for so long. It felt completely crazy now that I had never once dropped a hint to him.

"Did you enjoy watching me?" Alaric’s voice suddenly became sharp sounding like a dangerous edge cutting through his disbelief.

He violently pushed my hands away from his face, stepping back onto the sand. "Did you like torturing me with your crazy banters and stupid trash talk while secretly knowing exactly who you were to me? Knowing how you’ve always watched me from afar?’’

The anger in his chest was visible now, his shoulders tense and his fists tightly clenched.

"It’s not like that, Alaric," I said, taking a step forward on the shifting sand, my hands raised defensively.

"Then why?" Alaric demanded, his voice cracking against the sound of the waves. "Why did you hide it from me all these years and just act like a complete, arrogant jerk every time we met in the paddock!’’

Instead of running my hands through my hair like I usually did when I was stressed, I aggressively kicked at a loose patch of sand, watching the grains scatter into the wind. The defensive walls I usually kept bolted shut were crumbling.

"I wanted to tell you," I confessed, my voice dropping into a rough, strained whisper as I lowered my head, unable to meet his furious gaze. "I really wanted to tell you, Alaric. But I truly believed that if I allowed myself to grow attached to you, it would ruin us both. I thought it would affect my driving, and worse, it would ruin you."

The truth tasted bitter, but I forced it out. The heavy thudding of my heart was making me dizzy.

The secret of my identity wasn’t the only thing that had kept me hidden; the haunting memories of my childhood, of how my uncle had brutally abused me and treated me like trash, had left a deep, permanent scar in my life.

I had spent my entire life terrified that if I let anyone in, I would become that helpless kid again—someone who didn’t matter, someone easily discarded.

The fear of being that vulnerable scared me so much it felt like a physical weight crushing my lungs.

"I’m sorry," I muttered quietly, looking up through my lashes. "I’m sorry I kept it to myself and acted like a jerk. I shouldn’t have hidden it."

Alaric stared at me, the anger slowly draining from his posture, replaced by a hollow, breathless laugh. He stood up completely, turning his back to me to look out over the vast sea, though his eyes briefly darted to the empty space on the sand where Harold had been sitting.

I even believed Harold was there with him.

"We are both completely crazy," Alaric said, shaking his head. "I am someone who sees an image that isn’t even supposed to exist. Isn’t that crazy enough?" He heaved a ragged sigh, kicking a stone into the tide. "That is the craziest shit that could ever happen to anyone, and it happened to me. And you... you’re someone dealing with a past that’s completely eating you alive."

He took a long, stabilizing breath, his blonde hair whipping in the wind. "I heard you, you know. Back in Japan. I heard you confessing to your mother in that room. I thought... I thought you were just lying to her. Making up stories but...’’

"I wasn’t lying," I stepped closer, my voice filled with absolute certainty. "I love you, Alaric. I love you so much it terrifies me, but it’s the truest thing I’ve ever felt."

Alaric turned around slowly, a skeptical, highly vulnerable look in his eyes. "How is someone like us even supposed to work, Nico? Two broken drivers pretending to be rivals while losing their minds?"

"We will make it work," I assured him, closing the distance between us until I could feel the heat radiating from his body.

I reached out, firmly gripping his wrists. "I don’t care how messy it gets. No matter what happens on or off the track, I will make sure that we work. I promise you."

Alaric stared at our joined hands, and then, a genuine, breathless laugh broke through his lips. "It’s completely insane... because I felt the same way."

My eyes widened in absolute shock. I froze, completely locked in place, never expecting those words to actually come out of his mouth.

Alaric loves me? Who would have thought that my feelings weren’t one sided?

I could only stare at him, my heart doing a violent backflip in my chest.

"You... what?"

"I said we’re both stupid," Alaric murmured, a small, beautiful smile finally tugging at the corners of his lips. He glanced quickly to his left. "Even Harold agrees with me."

I let out a sharp, amused breath, a wave of pure relief washing over me. "Tell Harold to shut up and mind his own business."

Alaric chuckled softly, his eyes scanning the empty sand beside him before he looked back up at me, his smile widening. "Well, you don’t have to worry about him anymore. He’s no longer there."

I let out a wholehearted, booming laugh, the suffocating tension completely vanishing from the air. "Good. At least the plushie knows when to give us some privacy."

We moved closer, the space between us completely disappearing as I wrapped my arms loosely around his waist.

Alaric rested his hands on my chest, though his expression turned slightly worried again. "Seriously, though... How are we actually going to make a relationship work? We drive for different teams. The media is already suffocating us after what happened in Japan and besides, your recent interviews shows that we are in for a long disaster.’’

"Baby steps," I murmured, leaning down so my forehead rested against his. "Honestly, I don’t have a single clue how a normal relationship works anyways. I’ve never tried. But if it’s with you, Alaric? I’ll figure it out. We’ll figure it out together."

Alaric smiled up at me, his hazel eyes shining in the dimming twilight. He leaned in closer, his warm breath brushing against my skin as he whispered, "I really hope we know what we are doing."

"Of course we do," I whispered back, completely confident.

I leaned in the final inch, capturing his lips in a slow, deep, and incredibly passionate kiss.

As he instantly started kissing me back, his hands moving up to grip the nape of my neck, a heavy thought crossed my mind.

Right there, in the warmth of his embrace, I wanted to tell him my greatest, deepest secret—the truth about how I was an enigma. But as his lips parted against mine, I pulled the thought back, burying it deep down.

I didn’t want to ruin the absolute perfection of this moment.

Not now.