Chapter 158: The Light in the Darkness
"You even use the cafeteria’s kitchen?" Seeing Joanne’s reaction, Grace Winslow didn’t insist.
She wasn’t one to offer pity. Joanne Chase seemed like an ambitious and proud girl. What she needed wasn’t sympathy or handouts.
Joanne Chase looked a little embarrassed. "I sent my stipend and grain rations home. The cafeteria was looking for people to do odd jobs, so I signed up for a work-study."
"It doesn’t pay much, but it’s enough to cover my food expenses."
"I see. That’s great," Grace Winslow said with a nod.
Realizing Grace Winslow wasn’t looking down on her at all, Joanne Chase finally relaxed.
She could tell from Grace Winslow’s clothes and general appearance that she came from a good family. Her family had to be very well-off.
She had been worried that if she told Grace Winslow she was doing odd jobs in the cafeteria, Grace would look down on her or even make fun of her.
The other girls in their dorm didn’t think much of her and mostly avoided talking to or associating with her.
But to her surprise, Grace Winslow didn’t seem to look down on her at all.
"Grace, have you thought about what you want to do after graduation?" Now more relaxed, Joanne Chase started to open up.
Grace Winslow thought for a moment, then shook her head. "I haven’t really decided yet. I wanted to go to university to learn more, and foreign languages are completely new to me. I’ve never studied them before. If I get the chance, I might try to get into the Ministry of Diplomacy and gain some experience there."
"What about you? Do you have any plans?"
Joanne Chase faltered for a moment, then answered instinctively, "According to my parents’ plan, I’m supposed to go home right after graduation, marry a good man, and then... have lots and lots of children, I suppose."
"But what do you want? Do you want to go back, get married, have kids, and just be a baby-making machine?" Grace Winslow asked, noticing the disappointed and bleak look on Joanne’s face.
Joanne Chase hadn’t expected such a direct question. She thought about it seriously before shaking her head. "No, I don’t want that. I don’t want to be like my mother, having one child after another just for the sake of having a son. Because if you don’t have a son, people look down on you."
"Her health was completely ruined in the end, but she kept having more."
"The more children we had, the poorer we got. And the poorer we got, the more children she had."
"There are eight of us kids now. I’m the fourth. My three older sisters are already married."
"They aren’t happy. Every time I go home, I can see the bruises on them, and the despair in their eyes."
"I didn’t want to end up like them. That’s why I studied so hard for the exams, why I got into middle school, then high school, and now university..."
"I... I don’t want to be like them. I don’t want to go back just to get married and have children..."
As she spoke, Joanne Chase covered her face and started to cry. "But do I have any other choice?"
"My parents will never let me go."
"You do. As long as you want a choice, you have one. They have no right to force you to do something you don’t want to. You can have a wonderful future. You can do anything you want."
"You just have to believe in yourself, and you can do it."
"Besides, aren’t you already working hard to change your own fate? You left that little mountain village, you came to Coronet, you got into Crestwood University and became a student here. You’re going to change so much more in the future—you’ll become even more outstanding, even more brilliant. Joanne, you have to believe in yourself. You’re amazing."
"We aren’t born to be anyone’s possession. As long as you are resolute and don’t waver, no one can force you."
Looking at Joanne Chase, Grace Winslow suddenly saw a reflection of her former self.
Following the prescribed path: marriage, children, serving her in-laws and kids, dedicating her entire life to her family.
And in the end, she hadn’t come to a good end.
’If that’s the case, why should I let myself be weighed down by relationships and family in this life?’
As Joanne Chase listened to Grace Winslow, the dimness in her eyes gradually gave way to a bright light. She excitedly grasped Grace’s hand. "Grace, you’re so right. I... I have to fight back. I absolutely refuse to let them plan out my entire life. I don’t want to get married, I don’t want to be their tool for making money, and I don’t want my brothers and the rest of them to bleed me dry for the rest of my life!"
"But... but I... I have nothing. How am I supposed to fight back?"
A look of bewilderment flashed in Joanne’s eyes.
Grace Winslow thought for a moment. "For now, focus on your studies. Seize every opportunity you can to change your fate."
"I heard from our advisor that for our major, if your performance is good and your grades are excellent, there are opportunities to study abroad."
"Besides, if you get into the Ministry of Diplomacy after graduation, the monthly salary won’t be small. If your parents try to force you to marry, just tell them you can earn dozens of yuan a month from your job. That’s hundreds a year, and thousands over ten years. But if you marry someone, they can only sell you once for a one-time bride price. Any way you look at it, that’s a losing deal."
"Anyway, just string them along for now. Once you’re firmly on your own two feet, apply for a post at an embassy abroad when you get the chance. Even if they want to find you, they can’t just go overseas to track you down, right?"
With red-rimmed eyes, Joanne wanted to hug Grace but felt too shy, so she just raised a hand to wipe away her tears. "Grace, I’ll remember you for the rest of my life. You’ve given me a direction for my future. I was so lost before. I was even starting to wonder if there was any point in trying so hard."
"My family sent me another letter a couple of days ago. They think I’m not sending enough money or grain rations back and suspect I’m pocketing some for myself."
"They’re demanding I send fifty yuan home every month. Otherwise, they’ll come to Coronet, force me to drop out of school, and make me go home to get married right away."
"But where am I supposed to get fifty yuan? I barely have enough time for my classes as it is. What little time I have left is only enough to do odd jobs in the cafeteria for a few yuan of spending money."
"But I understand now. I won’t give up. I’ll keep working hard, no matter what."
Seeing the hope that now filled Joanne’s eyes, Grace was moved as well. "If you’re looking for a job, my family’s shop is opening soon. You could go and try applying there. My mom is going to be hiring anyway."
Joanne looked a little embarrassed. "I couldn’t do that, could I? I’ve already troubled you so much."
"I’m just suggesting you try. Whether or not you get the job will depend on your own skills. It won’t matter if I recommend you if you’re not a good fit. My mom is strictly impartial," Grace said with a smile, shaking her head.
Joanne Chase immediately felt a weight lift off her shoulders.
"I’ll go. Thank you, Grace. Do you want another flatbread?" Joanne offered one of the flatbreads to Grace again.
Grace shook her head. "No, thank you. This is your food for the month. If I eat it, what will you have?"
"Here, take this sauce. Just think of it as a loan. Once you’ve earned some money, you can treat me to something nice."
Joanne Chase’s eyes reddened again. She knew Grace was just being kind, saying that because she saw how hard it was for her to choke down the dry flatbreads.
But right now, she truly needed such kindness.