Chapter 59
After Vodka and Gin returned to Japan, they barely rested before immediately having Morofushi Hiromitsu call the two snipers Usuha Izuki had recruited to a training ground about to be abandoned.
Because they really doubted Usuha Izuki's reliability, even knowing this guy had good judgment in people, they were still worried that those recruited at such a critical time might be freeloaders or could expose the organization. So if there was any suspicion, they'd immediately eliminate them on the spot, and the training ground could be directly abandoned to avoid wasting the organization's precious resources.
Vodka examined the newcomers with the harsh and picky attitude of a mother-in-law scrutinizing daughters-in-law.
However, the results were beyond his expectations.
Usuha Izuki really wasn't randomly pulling people in to pad numbers for performance. These two recruits were highly professional with excellent sniping skills, had never joined any organization before, were simply free agents, and had relatively clean records.
It was just their personalities that seemed to have minor issues.
The male sniper had a decent personality—relatively silent and steady—but the female sniper was problematic, somewhat hot-tempered and seemingly unhappy with Vodka's cautious examination, complaining from time to time.
"The attitude when inviting me was nothing like this! If it weren't for Botanist's sake..."
Vodka: "......May I ask why you agreed to Botanist's invitation?"
"Hah?"
The female sniper was puzzled but still answered.
"Because his offer was very good, very generous... I mean, very fair. And what he said made a lot of sense. Rather than working alone having to find contracts, investigate targets, and handle sniping myself—where if I fail it's all my fault and I get nothing, plus I can't get revenge—it's better to join an organization. This way the organization handles missions, intelligence can be outsourced to intelligence personnel, if intelligence is wrong you can hold them accountable, if missions fail and it's not your fault you still get basic salary, and if it's your partner's fault you can report them for a bonus... I was already considering joining an organization, but other organizations weren't sincere enough. Only the guy your organization sent was most genuine and had great vision."
Vodka: "............"
What's going on? From his words, it sounds like Usuha Izuki won people over by throwing money at them...
Most importantly, this guy not only seemed to share common ground with Usuha Izuki but was also emotionally unstable, dressed overly fashionably, and even had tattoos on her face. Don't tell me she's a gender-swapped version of Usuha Izuki!!!
Vodka quietly shared this concern with Gin.
Gin pressed his temples: "If it's within normal limits, it's fine. If it goes too far, handle it according to rules. Not everyone is Botanist."
Vodka had an epiphany.
Right! He'd been tormented by that Usuha Izuki kid until his brain went haywire!
Why should he tolerate anyone going crazy?!
Could this newcomer affect Middle East smuggling routes? Could she be talented enough to be irreplaceable? Could she use ridiculous divination as a reason to ask Boss for his photo and have Boss not get angry but help find other methods? Could she make even Big Brother unable to threaten her casually?!
She could do none of these yet acted so arrogant!
Vodka felt better.
Although he still had prejudices against the first people Usuha Izuki successfully recruited, since no problems could be found and their abilities indeed met standards and could even be considered excellent, Vodka honestly admitted that if these two people had applied independently without Usuha Izuki's involvement, he wouldn't refuse them either.
Let's try them out first. Problems don't expose themselves immediately—it always takes time.
Even with all his personal grudges against Usuha Izuki, Vodka wouldn't go so far as to nitpick just to cause trouble for him, rejecting excellent talent. Otherwise Gin would be the first to settle accounts with him for using public position for private revenge.
When Vodka approved the two newcomers, Morofushi Hiromitsu took out his phone and composed an email to Usuha Izuki, informing him of this good news.
Vodka's eyes were sharp and immediately looked over. After guessing what he was doing, he directly asked: "Midorikawa, it seems you've been getting along quite well with Botanist recently?"
"Not very well." Morofushi Hiromitsu pressed send. "Because your contact frequency has increased somewhat, he's been complaining recently that I'm a traitor."
Vodka pondered: "Aren't I his friend?"
Although he personally didn't acknowledge it, since Usuha Izuki insisted on calling him a friend, then friends chatting more with each other—how did that make him a traitor?
"Last time you sided with Gin, criticizing his low recruitment success rate as wasting organization manpower." Morofushi Hiromitsu reminded him. "Botanist holds grudges."
Vodka was shocked: "I was telling the truth! Can't friends tell each other the truth?!"
Morofushi Hiromitsu said helplessly: "He wants favoritism."
Vodka was speechless: "You really understand him. No wonder he has the best attitude toward you now..." As he spoke, he suddenly asked with some confusion, "So how do you show favoritism toward him?"
Morofushi Hiromitsu's smile seemed to say "don't ask, asking again would be impolite."
Not knowing how Vodka interpreted this, he patted Morofushi Hiromitsu's shoulder with emotion: "You're not having it easy either."
Morofushi Hiromitsu himself felt it was actually okay.
Getting along with Usuha Izuki was indeed tiring, mainly mentally exhausting. Every single thing Usuha Izuki said, he responded to with an undercover mindset, always feeling there were hidden meanings.
But then once, probably because he'd been assigned a mission by Gin a few days prior, spent two days finding a sniping opportunity, then immediately rushed back to Usuha Izuki's house. In the familiar environment he carelessly relaxed too much, so when Usuha Izuki had been talking for ages and suddenly went quiet, Morofushi Hiromitsu was horrified to realize he'd apparently zoned out and treated Usuha Izuki's voice as white noise!
Had he missed anything important? Did Usuha Izuki notice he zoned out? Would he be angry? What would he do if angry?
Morofushi Hiromitsu was very nervous at the time.
But Usuha Izuki merely frowned and asked: "What have you been busy with these past two days?"
Morofushi Hiromitsu told the truth: "Sorry, because of a mission Gin assigned, I've been watching for several days and am a bit tired."
Usuha Izuki had originally designed a bunch of lines to make an undercover agent's heart flutter, but because of Gin's mission, Morofushi Hiromitsu's energy bar hit rock bottom and he didn't hear clearly what was said, much less farm any suspicion values.
This situation absolutely couldn't be tolerated. Usuha Izuki immediately called Vodka aggressively to settle accounts with Gin from afar.
After the call, having arrogantly finished cursing people out, Usuha Izuki returned: "Go rest. Next time Gin assigns you missions, tell me first."
Morofushi Hiromitsu hesitated: "Wouldn't that be inappropriate? If an executive assigns me a mission and I refuse..."
"Nothing inappropriate about it. Gin knows you're my partner yet bypasses me to assign you missions—that's looking down on me."
"After all, I'm always idle. It really doesn't look good."
Usuha Izuki advised him: "In everything, reflect less on yourself and blame others more. Gin is busy as a dog himself yet can't stand you being relaxed—that's definitely his problem."
Morofushi Hiromitsu: "......Okay."
This chicken soup seemed to have gone bad.
"But if you're worried about being too idle and having people gossip, this problem is easy to solve. Just wait."
Usuha Izuki had new inspiration for farming suspicion values.
It was around this time that Usuha Izuki began digging up a fugitive criminal every week or two for Morofushi Hiromitsu, saying negotiations failed and needed silencing, conveniently giving him something to do so he wouldn't constantly reflect on himself when idle.
Morofushi Hiromitsu: "......"
It felt like a cat was very worried about you, so it brought you a dead mouse.
Usuha Izuki's sudden diligence naturally attracted Vodka's suspicion. When Morofushi Hiromitsu explained it was to prevent Gin from taking up his time, Vodka was speechless and even somewhat sympathetic. As for the low negotiation success rate, that was a problem exposed later.
Anyway, considering these police fugitives replaced high officials or congressmen on his assassination list, Morofushi Hiromitsu had sufficient tolerance for the maximum two days per week of directly facing Usuha Izuki's madness.
So much so that in Vodka's view, they should move the Buddha statue from temples and let Morofushi Hiromitsu sit there instead.
"Speaking of which, do you really not know how he recruits people?" Vodka was very puzzled. "Why did he suddenly succeed? How did he do it before?"
Morofushi Hiromitsu responded smoothly: "If I knew, I would have written it in my reports. But every time I received instructions, he had already failed negotiations."
"Didn't I tell you to ask?"
"He said he couldn't tell me, worried about teaching the student and starving the master."
"......What's there to worry about with that nearly 100% failure rate technique!"
Vodka was speechless: "Forget it, I'll ask when I see him later... It's Friday evening again when he's free, right?"
He skillfully scheduled Usuha Izuki's Friday time.
Come Friday, Usuha Izuki appeared triumphantly: "How about it? My judgment is pretty good, right?"
Vodka complained: "Your judgment is decent, but negotiation skills are terrible. Why did it take so long to succeed with just two people?"
Usuha Izuki sighed: "Not my fault. Those people before were all too greedy and extremely arrogant. Even someone with as good a temper as me couldn't tolerate it. I felt they weren't suitable for joining the organization..."
Vodka: "......How so?"
"Take that serial killer—letting him into the organization was doing him a favor. The organization could even help clean up his messes, yet he still wanted money!" Usuha Izuki was indignant. "What a big face he had!"
Vodka suddenly had an ominous premonition: "That bomb maniac..."
Usuha Izuki argued righteously: "The organization provides raw materials—how expensive is that! If he bought them himself, he couldn't afford them even if he sold himself! How could he still have the nerve to ask for salary!"
Vodka didn't continue asking.
He suddenly understood why Usuha Izuki failed completely before but succeeded this time.
So previously Usuha Izuki recruited people without even wanting to offer salaries, and only this time, to deal with Big Brother's performance check, he offered high pay!
He knew there was something wrong with this success, but didn't expect it to be this kind of problem!!!
Vodka really wanted to criticize Usuha Izuki for being as unprofessional as an undercover agent, but seeing Usuha Izuki's self-righteous attitude as if he saw no problem with himself, he fell silent.
Not only was Vodka silent, even Gin and Morofushi Hiromitsu were shocked by this negotiation process.
After a moment of deathly silence, Gin's eye twitched as he took a deep breath: "You don't need to negotiate in the future..."
Usuha Izuki protested: "I met my performance targets! You promised that meeting targets meant I could continue being responsible for recruitment!"
After such a long time of understanding, Gin knew that when Usuha Izuki was willing to follow logic, it was best not to break agreements casually, or it would be troublesome later.
But he couldn't let Usuha Izuki continue causing havoc like this. His judgment was good and quality was high—there might be talent the organization truly needed. What if other organization members went to recruit later, only to discover they'd been inexplicably silenced by Usuha Izuki!
Gin's thinking was flexible and he immediately changed his approach: "Then you don't need to negotiate personally anymore. Submit name lists weekly and I'll have other organization members go."
Usuha Izuki was unhappy: "Recruiting people is my authority..."
Morofushi Hiromitsu timed his intervention perfectly: "But if there's a chance to slack off, why trouble yourself?"
Usuha Izuki pondered: "You make sense."
Gin and Vodka simultaneously cast complex glances at Morofushi Hiromitsu.
What a waste putting such talent beside Usuha Izuki!!!
"Then let's do that." Usuha Izuki said reluctantly. "I've worked hard for so long, I'm really quite tired..."
Vodka: "......?"
Where are you tired? Isn't Midorikawa the one who's tired?!
Usuha Izuki reflected internally: [Going through all this trouble just to fleece the organization—I'm really working so hard. They're all like paranoid patients, yet when it comes to me they're so stingy with suspicion values.]
Thanks to the excuse Morofushi Hiromitsu provided, he successfully wasted organization manpower and eliminated potential future organization members, though the suspicion values farmed could only be said to barely reach the target line.
System: [I think you should reflect...]
Usuha Izuki didn't reflect: "Then I'll give myself a vacation next. Don't bother me unless there's something important..."
The Police Academy was about to start internships, so he needed to adapt to the new rhythm.
Gin refused: "There's a mission you must participate in. There's overtime pay."
"Even with overtime pay I'm not interested..."
"It involves FBI and CIA. Sure you don't want to come?"
Usuha Izuki was puzzled: "What, are they saying my foster father was a Soviet undercover agent again?"
Morofushi Hiromitsu: "......?"
What Soviet undercover agent?