Chapter 195: You Carry Too Much
Rain poured relentlessly over the Azure Dragon Palace.
Thunder rolled across the sky, lightning tearing through the clouds in sharp flashes, but inside, the palace remained warm, busy and alive.
Servants moved in waves, preparing for the grand dinner meant to welcome Ningyan’s children.
Jun Haoxuan had already taken time to stabilize the crystal within Ningyan. After that, he was pulled away again. Beast King duties.
Wuhen was nowhere to be seen. And neither was Rong Yue.
That... lingered.
Ningyan didn’t return to the main hall.
Instead, he wandered. Until he found himself outside, beneath the open corridor where rain spilled endlessly just beyond the carved stone edges.
He stepped closer and extended his hand as a single cool drop fell against his palm, followed immediately by another.
He watched the water gather there, trembling...
His vision blurred and his chest tightened as a breath hitched in his throat. He clenched his hand into a tight fist, letting the water slip through his fingers until every trace of it was gone.
"You know," a voice said behind him, calm and unhurried, "you should cry if you want to."
Ningyan turned.
Rong Yue
He stood there like he belonged to the storm itself, composed, untouched, those sharp blue feline eyes fixed entirely on Ningyan. Watching.
He was always watching.
Ningyan frowned, sniffing once as he straightened.
"Why would I cry?" he said, dismissive. "There’s nothing to cry about."
A lie. And both of them knew it.
The Water City flickered at the edges of his mind.
He shut it down.
He really needed to stop going back there.
That place brought nothing but... this.
Rong Yue didn’t respond immediately. He simply stood there. Taking in the way Ningyan’s shoulders were just a little too tense, the way his lips pressed together, the way he refused to look at him now.
The rain grew heavier.
Wind brushed past them, tugging at loose strands of hair, rustling silk.
Still.. silence.
Then Rong Yue moved until he stood beside him. Close enough to share the same edge of the storm.
"Suppressing it won’t make it disappear," he said quietly. "It just waits... then it breaks out all at once."
Ningyan didn’t look at him, but Rong Yue continued anyway. "Wuhen mentioned it. Your anger. I’ve seen it myself."
Ningyan turned sharply. His eyes weren’t glowing but they didn’t need to be.
They burned anyway.
"You don’t know anything about me," he said, voice tight. "So don’t speak like you do."
Rong Yue met his gaze.
"I didn’t say I understood you," he replied calmly. "I said I’ve seen you."
Ningyan clenched his fists. "You don’t..."
"You carry too much," Rong Yue cut in smoothly, his voice steady. "Too much empathy. Too much responsibility. What happened to Meishan... to those children, none of it is your fault."
Ningyan looked away sharply, jaw tightening. "Go away."
"I don’t want to."
Ningyan turned immediately. "Then I’ll leave."
He didn’t get far. Rong Yue caught his arm.
Ningyan’s eyes widened at the sudden contact.
"You feel it, don’t you?" Rong Yue said, quieter now. "That weight."
Ningyan tried to pull away.
"If you keep forcing it down," Rong Yue tightened his grip, "it won’t disappear. It will break you."
Ningyan’s brows furrowed, frustration rising.
"And when it does, everything you’re trying to protect will go with it. The children... What you’ve built. What you’re holding onto."
Ningyan jerked his arm again. "Let go..."
Rong Yue didn’t; instead, he pulled him closer, wrapping one arm around his waist in a firm and grounding hold.
Ningyan froze for a heartbeat, and then another, before he finally broke. The tears came all at once, unrestrained, as he clutched at Rong Yue’s sleeve with sharp, uneven breaths, his fingers tightening like he needed something, anything, to hold onto while all of it spilled out.
The Water City. The children. The blood.
The fear... Not just for them. But for himself.
Because he knew what happened when everything was buried. When nothing was released.
When power and emotion twisted into something unrecognizable.
That Ningyan destroyed everything and was destroyed in return.
Rong Yue didn’t interrupt. He just held him until the storm passed.... Until Ningyan’s breathing evened... Until the trembling stopped.
Slowly, Ningyan pulled back and sniffed.
He wiped his face with Rong Yue’s sleeve without thinking.
His face heated instantly.
He turned away, crossing his arms as he stared out at the rain again, pretending very hard that nothing had just happened.
Rong Yue leaned, just enough to catch a glimpse of his expression.
Ningyan immediately turned his face further away.
Rong Yue laughed. "This is... unexpectedly adorable."
Ningyan shot him a glare, ears faintly red.
"If you mention this again," he said flatly, "we are never speaking."
Rong Yue nodded. "As you wish."
Ningyan smirked. "How unexpectedly obedient."
Rong Yue’s eyes widened before he cleared his throat. "would you rather I remember this... or the time you were poisoned and nearly died in my arms while I looked for help? Twice, was it?"
Ningyan stared at him and scoffed in disbelief. "You’re never going to let that go, are you?"
"Never."
Ningyan’s lips broke into a small, helpless smile.
"...Thank you," he said after a moment, quieter now. "I feel better."
A pause followed, and then he spoke with a more grounded tone. "The war plans..."
Rong Yue sighed. "Meishan’s original personality surfaced."
Ningyan’s smile vanished. "What did he say?"
"This personality... isn’t just coexisting anymore. It’s trying to take over completely."
Ningyan’s chest tightened.
"But he still intends to kill Lan Yunlai," Rong Yue continued. "That hasn’t changed. However, after that..."
He didn’t finish immediately. He really didn’t need to.
Ningyan already understood. "...He’ll seal him away,"
Rong Yue didn’t deny it. "Jun Haoxuan, Wuhen, and I came to the same conclusion."
"No," Ningyan said immediately, shaking his head. "That can’t happen."
Rong Yue watched him for a moment. "We may have a way to stop it."
Ningyan looked at him again, sharper now. "How?"
"Lan Huiwen. Meishan’s mother. If she’s alive," Rong Yue said, "she’s the only one who can stabilize him or bring him back completely."
Ningyan swallowed.
He already knew that Meishan split personality, that violent, protective instinct was born from Lan Yunlai. From everything Meishan had endured in his hands.
"I can do it," Ningyan said with full resolve.
Rong Yue smiled. "That’s... reassuring."
For a moment, neither of them moved, then Rong Yue lifted his hand slowly, his fingers brushing lightly against Ningyan’s cheek to wipe away the faint trail of a tear, effortlessly.
Ningyan’s breath caught and his lips parted, only to press together again. He didn’t pull away.