Martial World Full of Disguises

33: The Sorrow of Longing

The next day, Lu Yanran needed to travel further west to the Shigu Basin to assist a martial sect that had been driven out by the Falling Shadow Sect, helping them rebuild and establish a Martial Supervision Hall. The route happened to pass through Huailiu Village, so Fu Peibai hitched a ride.

The carriage traveled for several days, moving from the official road to muddy stone paths, finally stopping at the entrance to Huailiu Village. In less than half a year, what had once been a bustling farming village with curling chimney smoke had now become utterly lifeless.

The houses were dilapidated, weeds grew everywhere, and even the willow tree at the village entrance stood bare. Everything looked so desolate and bleak.

Fu Peibai jumped down from the carriage, her face revealing nothing. She waved goodbye to A-Fu and Xing Guang, then finally bid farewell to Lu Yanran through the carriage curtain.

"Mm, go ahead."

After hearing these words from inside the carriage, Fu Peibai tightened the bundle on her back and slowly walked toward the village. Inside the bundle were the offerings she had prepared.

Fu Peibai's tall, thin figure gradually disappeared into the depths of the village. Lu Yanran lowered the window curtain and said indifferently, "Let's go."

The convoy soon departed, and Fu Peibai returned to the small courtyard where she had lived for sixteen years.

The courtyard wasn't large, and now the ground was completely covered with weeds. The water well had grown thick moss, several large holes had broken through the roof tiles, and the little figures Fu Jiaxu had drawn on the walls had been washed away by rain until they were barely visible.

She just stood there in the courtyard as memories rushed over her like a tide, fragments of her former life with her family crashing through her mind.

Only after death had separated them forever did she understand what the books meant by wanting to cry but having no tears.

Looking at the desolation and ruin before her, her heart seemed to have become a patch of withered grass. She couldn't cry, yet an enormous grief surged within her.

She walked into the dilapidated wooden house. After her gaze swept around once, her expression froze.

No... that wasn't right. How could the room be in such disarray? When she left Huailiu Village, she had clearly cleaned the house and organized everything neatly. Now it was in chaos. How could this be?

A huge doubt rose in Fu Peibai's heart. She looked around. All the drawers and cabinets had been opened, their contents scattered on the floor. Someone had clearly come here searching for something.

Who? And for what? Could it be the Falling Shadow Sect, or someone else?

Full of suspicion, she went outside and checked the other ruined houses. None showed signs of having been ransacked. This meant whoever it was had come specifically for the Fu family.

Though the day was cool, cold sweat broke out on Fu Peibai's body. She had a vague feeling that her family's death wasn't as simple as the Demonic Sect capturing children to refine pills. There might be a larger conspiracy behind it.

She stood there for a long time before turning to leave, walking to the withered willow tree at the village entrance.

The small earthen mounds where she had buried her family had gradually flattened. She took out the paper money from her bundle and burned it one by one over the soil. Stacks of paper money turned to ash, white smoke rising into the air, looking just like the cooking smoke that had risen from every household at sunset in the old days. But now, everything had changed beyond recognition.

After the paper money burned away, she knelt down and kowtowed heavily. Her voice was trembling and hoarse. "Father, Mother, Jiaxu, I've come to see you."

Then she straightened up and kowtowed again with utmost solemnity. "Wait for me. I will avenge you. I definitely will."

On the third kowtow, Fu Peibai said nothing more. She rose, brushed the dirt from her forehead, took one heavy look at the silent ruins of the village, and another at the withered willow tree, then turned and left.

After returning to Xingyang City, Fu Peibai remained depressed for several days. During the day she went out to practice martial arts and horseback riding. At night she also practiced martial arts. Aside from eating and sleeping, she did nothing but train. Even when Ding Yi came to the inn to find her, she showed little interest.

Only when snow began to fall from the sky did she realize winter had arrived. The weather had taken a sharp turn, and she began to worry about that woman who always wore white.

By her calculation, she and Lu Yanran had been apart for over a month and a half. To say she didn't miss her would be a lie. When eating, when sleeping, even when practicing martial arts, she would suddenly zone out, Lu Yanran's voice and smile appearing in her mind.

Never having known longing before, now that she did, she was consumed by it.

She sat by the window and sighed deeply, watching the drifting snow outside, her thoughts drifting away with it. Only when Ding Yi came to find her and clapped her hard on the shoulder did she snap back to reality.

Now Ding Yi had found work doing odd jobs at a wealthy household through an acquaintance. On his days off, he came to visit Fu Peibai. Without fail, he found her with that look of being lost in another world. He asked worriedly, "Little Bai, what's wrong with you lately? Something on your mind?"

Fu Peibai's concerns naturally couldn't be easily spoken of. She sighed softly. "Nothing. What brings you here today?"

Ding Yi rubbed his nose, looking conflicted. After a moment, he spoke. "I wanted to discuss something with you."

"What is it?"

"Well... when are you all returning to the Heavenly Pole Sect?"

"I don't know how the Peak Master's business is progressing. Probably next year."

"Then when you leave, could you, could you take me with you? I want to go to the Heavenly Pole Sect too."

Fu Peibai's expression grew more serious. "Why? Do you want to learn martial arts?"

Ding Yi waved his hands repeatedly. "No, no. I know my own limitations. I'm not interested in learning martial arts, and I couldn't handle that kind of hardship anyway. I just want to work as a servant on your peak."

Fu Peibai saw something meaningful in his smile and grew even more suspicious. "Why does it have to be our peak? Isn't your current job going well?"

"Ah, well, of course I'd miss you. Wouldn't it be nice if we siblings could be in the same place and see each other often?"

"You're quite a bit older than me."

"Fine, fine. We are brother and sister, alright?"

Fu Peibai recalled that Ding Yi had been casually asking about Chaoquan Peak's situation for the past half month, and frequently inquired about the Peak Master and A-Fu. Combined with how he had acted when he saw the Peak Master last time, a suspicion rose in her heart. She frowned and asked seriously, "You insist on going to Chaoquan Peak. Is it because you've fallen for the Peak Master?"

Ding Yi's eyes went wide, his voice rising. "How is that possible? What are you saying?! I'm too busy being afraid of her to like her. A woman like her is only meant to be admired from afar. I wouldn't dare have any other thoughts."

Fu Peibai's suspended heart settled down. "Then what's the real reason?" After speaking, she thought of something and asked tentatively, "It wouldn't be... for Sister A-Fu, would it?"

Ding Yi didn't speak this time. His ears visibly reddened, and his eyes darted around.

Fu Peibai smiled and patted his shoulder. "How did you come to like Sister A-Fu? Don't tell me it was just from that boat tour?"

"Hey, don't laugh. What's so funny about that? Sister A-Fu is so gentle and kind, and beautiful too. Isn't it normal for me to like her?"

Fu Peibai's smile widened. "Yes, yes, normal. Sister A-Fu is indeed easy to like."

"Then promise me you'll take me along when you return to the sect."

"It's not up to me, but when the Peak Master returns, I'll put in a good word for you."

Ding Yi immediately let out a happy exclamation.

Fu Peibai couldn't help feeling a bit envious. Ding Yi could openly speak of the person he admired, while she could only bury her feelings deep in her heart.

Her expression dimmed slightly. Ding Yi, caught up in his happiness, didn't notice. He chatted with Fu Peibai a while longer before leaving the inn.

After Ding Yi left, the room fell quiet again. Fu Peibai sat by the window for a long time, then an idea formed in her mind. She wanted to go to Shigu Basin to see the Peak Master.

Thinking this, her feet began to move. She quickly packed her bags and left the inn, going to the stable to rent a horse. The stable hand saw the weather and kindly advised her to travel tomorrow instead. There was heavy snow today, visibility was poor, and it might rain tonight. But Fu Peibai was unusually stubborn. She rented the horse anyway and rode off toward the west.

Shigu Basin was nearly half a month's journey from Xingyang City. Fu Peibai traveled through wind and rain, braving days of snow and wind, yet somehow made it in just seven days by pushing her horse hard.

The basin sat at a lower elevation, and the air was damp and cold. When she reached the only small town nearby, she was wrapped in rain and snow, flakes clinging even to her eyebrows. She looked thoroughly bedraggled.

She walked to a small inn, rubbing her hands together, and asked the proprietor if there were any martial sect households nearby.

The proprietor gave her a look, seemingly discerning that she wasn't there to stay the night. His tone cooled considerably.

"There's a manor about ten li east of town, outside the settlement."

Fu Peibai thanked him, mounted her horse again, and galloped out of town. The biting cold wind mixed with rain and snow stung her face. She barely managed to keep her eyes open. After riding for about a quarter hour, she finally saw a brightly lit manor ahead.

She leaned down and patted the horse's head. "You've worked hard these past few days."

Reaching the manor's main gate, she dismounted and stated her purpose to the guard. The guard went inside to deliver the message, and soon A-Fu came out.

The moment she saw Fu Peibai, she cried out in surprise. "Little Bai?!" Seeing the horse Fu Peibai held beside her, she was even more amazed. "Little Bai? How are you here? You learned to ride?"

Fu Peibai smiled. "I was bored staying in Xingyang City, so I wanted to come see you all and the Peak Master. Figured it would be convenient for future travel, so I learned to ride."

A-Fu quickly waved her over. "Come in, come in. Look at you. Go take a hot bath right away, or you'll catch a chill."

The two walked into the manor. A-Fu arranged a room for Fu Peibai and ordered hot water prepared, instructing her to soak well and drive out the cold. But Fu Peibai's mind was elsewhere. She responded absently, and after A-Fu left, she slipped out of the room and began exploring.

The manor was large and rather empty. The front courtyard housed people from the local martial sect, while the rear courtyard was for the Heavenly Pole Sect group. The back was much quieter, with lights out in every room. She searched all around but couldn't find which room was Lu Yanran's. Though she knew there was no rush and she could find the Peak Master in the morning, she couldn't settle down. She was desperate to see the person she had been thinking about for so long.

Feeling disappointed, she prepared to return to her room. The next moment, she heard a familiar cool voice behind her.

"Why are you here?"

She turned around in delight, her dejection vanishing instantly, her eyes bright with joy as she gazed at Lu Yanran.

The woman before her still wore white, but with a thick cloak added. Her pale skin and the white fur of the cloak were nearly indistinguishable.

Fu Peibai stepped forward twice, her excitement gradually fading. The Peak Master looked even thinner than a month ago.

"Peak Master, you've lost weight."

Lu Yanran didn't respond, asking again why she had come.

Fu Peibai touched her nose in embarrassment and said, "I just wanted to come see Sister A-Fu and Brother Xing..." She paused, then added, "And the Peak Master."

Lu Yanran remained silent, gazing at the rain and snow on the thin, tall figure before her. Though those eyes still sparkled with spirit, the entire face was bloodless. She softened her tone. "Go wash up and rest first. We'll talk tomorrow."

Just seeing Lu Yanran once was enough to satisfy Fu Peibai. Though she still had so much she wanted to say, she obediently returned to her room.