Chapter Ω5
"So," said the Dungeon Master. "We're back in stub land."
Bethel took a moment to look at the blank void around her. Her entire sensorium was gone, replaced by simple vision and sense of her projection. It was a terrifying display of power. She did her best not to bristle. "You're him?"
"I am indeed," he replied. "Or a shade of him, I guess, the stub version of him. But him all the same."
"Why am I here?"
"To plug the new ebook," said the Dungeon Master.
"And what is an ebook?" asked Bethel, in spite of herself. She wouldn't try violence, she had heard where that had gotten Juniper. To attempt force and fail would feel worse than sitting back and holding her head high while she endured this indignity.
"It's like a book, but with a lot of the letter E," said the Dungeon Master. "Words like 'needle' and 'deadended'. 'Beekeeper'. You know."
"I see," replied Bethel, though she didn't. "Get it over with then."
He paused. "Do you like books?" he asked.
"I've read thousands of them," replied Bethel.
"That wasn't the question," said the Dungeon Master. "And I specifically meant fiction books."
"Why do you ask the question if you already know the answer?" asked Bethel.
"Hrm," replied the Dungeon Master. "I think you don't like fabulists, and to the extent it feels like someone is trying to ensnare you in a story, you rebel against it. I'm the same way, actually."
"This book you're trying to hawk isn't a fabulism?" asked Bethel.
Unauthorized reproduction: this story has been taken without approval. Report sightings.
"Well," said the Dungeon Master. "Yes and no. Certainly not in the sense of the literary genre of fabulism. And it's certainly not a fable by any stretch of the definition. It's fiction, filled with things that didn't happen, or only happened in the imagined world. But it's meant to be an accurate portrayal. It's meant to have a sense of realism to it, rather than being an exaggeration of the real that gets all blown out of proportion."
"Sell it then," replied Bethel.
"It's the story of Juniper and his companions," said the Dungeon Master. "This particular episode revolves mostly around the athenaeum of Sound and Silence, classic magic college stuff."
"Then you could have brought Valencia instead," said Bethel. "She might have appreciated it more."
"Well ... maybe," said the Dungeon Master. "At any rate, there's intrigue, there's romance, there are some great fight scenes, interesting magic systems, it has it all. We've got munchkinry and meta, what more could you want?"
"I decline to buy," replied Bethel.
"Aw, really?" asked the Dungeon Master. "Well, it's not for you, it's for," he waved his hand. "Them."
"We're being watched?" asked Bethel.
The Dungeon Master nodded.
"I don't like that," said Bethel.
"Ironic," replied the Dungeon Master.
"Is it?" asked Bethel.
"Well, maybe not," nodded the Dungeon Master. "Hypocritical?"
"Perhaps," said Bethel. "Is that why you selected me for this?"
"I'm rotating through the cast of characters," said the Dungeon Master. "And if I can be honest with you, you're a little bit of a troublesome one, given what happens in this book."
"Oh?" asked Bethel.
"But I can't say more," replied the Dungeon Master. "We have to keep some sense of mystery and intrigue, don't we?"
Bethel pursed her lips.
"You know, when I brought Grak here, he just refused to consent to it, I thought that was a better way of handling it," said the Dungeon Master.
"I've refused consent before and was not particularly pleased by how well my wishes were respected," replied Bethel.
"Oh come on," said the Dungeon Master. "Don't make it about that."
"Is this story you're weaving not about the power people have over others?" asked Bethel.
"First off, I would never say that I was 'weaving' a story, that's something only a tool would say." The Dungeon Master rolled his eyes. "And it's really a buried subtheme, if anything. If you want a story that's about having power, that's Thresholder, in stores now."
"I've said that I'm not interested." Bethel folded her arms.
"Fine, go on your way," sighed the Dungeon Master. "I knew I should have pulled Valencia."