Chapter 2
Chapter 2: The Food in This World Tastes Terrible
Culinary techniques never advanced, there's no concept of sanitation, and when someone gets food poisoning, they just endure it until they're on the verge of death before seeking out a healer.
As long as something isn't visibly spoiled, it gets shoved into the mouth, and even if it's gone stale or grown mold, people just pick it up and eat it anyway.
Well, that's just how the Middle Ages are—isn't this the barbaric era where they dissolved lead into wine and drank it?
I couldn't stand that.
Ever since I entered this world, I've been steadily studying cooking, recalling the cooking shows and YouTu*e videos I'd seen in my previous life.
Born as a baby, sent as an apprentice to the Sage at the Mage Tower, then joining the Hero's Party and carrying on until now—twenty-one years in total. Alongside magic, I've consistently kept up with cooking, and I think I've now acquired at least a basic level of culinary skill…. or so I believe.
Now I've quit the Hero's Party, and there's no particular reason to follow the main story anymore, so I'm truly a free man.
I am Yujin, the culinary artist and Mastermage.
I am the man who will bring a snack bar to this world.
"For starters, the ultimate goal is…. Should I aim for the entire menu at Gimcheon?"
Do you know about it?
Gimcheon—that restaurant where you have to check off your own order form—has a menu of over a hundred items.
Of course, they reuse ingredients, but even so, the sheer volume of it all cannot be denied.
My ultimate goal lies in perfectly recreating the variety of Gimcheon's menu and every one of its flavors.
At the pinnacle of it all: the Special Set Meal—the one that comes with jjolmyeon, pork cutlet, gimbap, and salad all at once. Commonly known as the Mansur Set Meal. To fully realize that.[1]
"To do that, I'll need to find a location where ingredient procurement is easy and where I can freely conduct food research to my heart's content."
And so, I set out on a journey.
Toward the land that would become my Gimcheon.
.
.
.
.
Dungeons are money.
No matter how unpopular a rural town is, no matter how terrible the transportation, no matter how pathetic the item drops, no matter how thoroughly run-down a backwater it may be—if it has a dungeon, it'll have at least one academy.
And so the place I headed to was the most backwater of all backwaters, the countryside of all countrysides—a dungeon whose drop item variety and scale were so dismal it was almost a shame to call it a dungeon, and a country school so embarrassing it was almost a shame to call it an academy.
Demeter Dungeon's Demeter Academy.
"You say you'd like to open a restaurant here?"
"That's correct."
The principal looked at me with a suspicious gaze.
‘What is this guy? ‘That was the expression on his face.
Normally, this would be the part where I pull out my mage's certificate and he'd go 'Wooooooah, an Archmage has graced our academy with his presence!!' and prostrate himself before me—but I didn't so much as breathe a word about magic.
Just let someone find out I'm a mage.
The moment that happens, a report goes straight to the Mage Tower and she'll come.
My master will come.
'My dear apprentice! Since you've given up adventuring, it's about time you helped me with my research again!'
'I'll let you go once your research is done and your achievements have touched the heavens! Ha ha ha! Enjoy your life at the Mage Tower!' —and just like that, she'd confine me and not let me go until I reached at least the 7th Circle!
No matter how much talent I overflow with, living the life of some kind of graduate student is not something I want.
To get back to the story—I'm planning to conceal my identity and run a small eatery in some corner of this Demeter Academy.
"During the lunch hour, I can sell meals to the students, and at night, I can serve drinks and light food to the faculty."
"Our academy lacks a great deal. I'm not sure you'd get the level of sales you're hoping for…."
"That's fine. I'm aiming to be a culinary researcher, you see. I have savings set aside."
"Ah…."
The principal, now seemingly satisfied, dropped the look of suspicion.
"I understand. In that case, this Demeter Academy should suit you well."
"Then where should I set up the stall? Ideally somewhere close to the academy, and close to the dungeon as well, if possible."
"As it happens, there's one vacant space available. The location is excellent. Let's go with that. It will require a bit of renovation work, but…."
"I'll handle that myself. As long as I can move in quickly."
"Yes. Very well."
The principal slid a dust-caked contract across the desk.
I signed it, paid a certain amount as advance rent, and shook the principal's hand firmly.
"If you wait a moment, Professor Daisy—a full professor in the Department of Swordsmanship—will come to show you around the premises. As for me, I have work to attend to, so if you'll excuse me…."
"Ah. Yes."
The principal said as much and took his leave. Alone in the principal's office, I let out a quiet sigh.
For now, I'd successfully signed a contract with the academy. It doesn't matter how few students are enrolled. What matters is that I've secured a spot near the Demeter Grand Dungeon.
Demeter Grand Dungeon.
"The terrain-shifting dungeon said to be the most brutal of all."
If the first floor is a meadow, the second floor might suddenly be a desert—making mapping and exploration an absolute nightmare.
But.
"Named after Demeter, the Goddess of the Harvest, a dungeon where every single drop item is a type of ingredient…!!"
Here, I can obtain everything I desire.
"Excuse me."
Just as I was quietly steeling my resolve. The door to the principal's office opened again, and a woman stepped inside.
A few years older than me, perhaps—a dark-haired woman with a layered bob cut.
‘Pretty impressive.’
That was my first impression.
By watching someone's posture and the way they shift their center of gravity, you can gauge how capable they are as a combatant.
She was overwhelmingly stronger than an ordinary swordsman. Somewhere around the beginning to middle of Expert rank?
"I'm Daisy, a full professor in the Department of Swordsmanship, assigned to guide you."
"Yujin. Yujin Kalintz."
"Very well. I'll show you around."
The expression on her face was cold enough to send a chill through the air. Say the wrong thing and she'd cut you down on the spot.
She gave me a tour covering the main building of the academy as a reference point: the training grounds, the Second Annex, and the entrance to the dungeon. And every single time, I had no choice but to ask her about what I was seeing.
"The training grounds are completely overgrown."
"There are no staff to maintain them."
"The Second Annex is…. Is that haunted-looking mansion over there actually the annex?"
"There are no students who need to use it that far out."
"We have to cut through this forest to reach the dungeon? It feels like we'd run into monsters before even getting to it."
"There are no people to clear this path."
‘Wow. Fantastic.’
‘A backwater academy! Bravo!’
"And here is the storefront. It's close to the dungeon and can be seen at a glance from the academy."
What she led me to—the only vacant space in this entire academy—was a crumbling, decrepit ruin. Oh my, just look at those termite-riddled wooden pillars. And they're somehow still holding the building up—some kind of new avant-garde art?
"Is this…. the right place?"
"Yes. This is the only vacant space in Demeter Academy. It will require a bit of renovation work, but…."
"A bit? It doesn't look even remotely like a bit? It's like…."
The moment I gave the building—which was supposed to become my stall—a light tap, there was a crack.
Before I could even react, that sound grew louder and louder, and then….
Pfffff—!
CRASH….
With a groan and a roar, the storefront collapsed.
"……."
"……."
I looked at Daisy, and she glanced at me briefly before averting her gaze.
"It would seem it requires…. a bit of renovation work."
‘Hey.’
‘You.’
‘Look at me properly.’
‘It completely collapsed, you know? I'll have to build it from scratch, you know?’
‘Hey, don't look away. Hey!’
.
.
.
.
Contracts between adults are dirty things by nature.
The contract had already been signed, I'd confirmed the premises with my own eyes, I'd acknowledged and agreed that renovation work would be needed, and in the end, it was my own hand that touched the building and brought it down.
I could throw a fit and storm out screaming that it's null and void—but I need to live near this Demeter Dungeon….
Daisy left, and I was alone.
"Tsk…. Can't be helped."
One spell and I could clear away rubble of this scale in an instant, but if I want to avoid being found out as a mage, I can't clean it all up in a single day. I began by casting a strength enhancement spell on myself and started hauling away the wreckage of the building.
Since it had been a decaying wooden structure, it broke apart easily, and I lit a fire using the pieces as kindling. The flames caught and burned high. I could just burn it all away over the next few days.
Ah—I did get permission to light a fire, provided it didn't spread. Even they apparently thought it was too much to tell me not to even light a fire.
The sight of my very first place of residence going up in beautiful flames has me on the verge of tears for some reason.
"I suppose I should take comfort in the fact that I can still cook."
I muttered to myself out of habit.
'Apprentice. Mages tend to be people of few words, so if you don't get into the habit of talking to yourself, you might forget language altogether!'
'Is that from personal experience, Master?'
'It is!'
A conversation with my master from a few years back drifted through my mind, and before I knew it, I was smiling.
That's enough reminiscing. First things first—a meal. I drew my fingers downward through the air and opened my Subspace.
A Private Space—magic of at least the 6th Circle.
Most mages would use this Subspace to store mana potions and magic scrolls, but in my case, it holds nothing but cookware and ingredients.
Just because it's a Subspace doesn't mean time stops flowing inside it or that anything stored within lasts indefinitely—that kind of miracle would require adding time magic on top of spatial magic, which means you'd need to be at least the 8th Circle.
Another mage might call me crazy, but this is my favorite way to use it.
"Now then, today's menu is…."
Right then. My magic detection sensed someone approaching from far away.
I closed my Subspace immediately and watched the figure creeping toward me.
It wasn't the principal, and it wasn't Daisy.
A small build—almost certainly a female student.
She crept closer and then darted into the bushes. Not that it did any good—my detection could read every detail of her.
Black hair down to her shoulders, and eyes brimming with curiosity.
Those sparkly, shining eyes were rather charming.
It reminded me of my high school sister back in my days as Yujin of the Republic of Korea.
A high school girl?
Right. There were those here.
The food culture of this world is trash, but even so, there's flour, there's oil, there's salt, and there's sugar—a bit on the expensive side, but it's here.
Flour, oil, salt, sugar.
Add a student to the mix.
My mind was made up.
First: a wheat dough kneaded to a satisfying chewiness and boiled through.
To describe it more precisely—I rolled the wheat tteok into long cylinders, then cut them into pieces just small enough to eat in one bite.[2]
I kept the oil temperature slightly low, poked small holes throughout the tteok, and slowly deep-fried them.
The sizzle and scent of refined carbohydrates meeting hot oil spread through the forest—and it reached the nose of the female student watching from her hiding spot, because she gave a sudden start, making the bushes she was hiding in tremble. Then came the sound—gulp—of saliva going down her throat, and before I knew it, I was smiling.
"I can hear you in there, so you might as well come out."
"!!"
There was a rustle from the bushes, and the girl stood up and walked toward me.
"A-ah, hello! Suspicious person!"
"Yes. Hello. And who are you?"
"A-ah…. Let, let me introduce myself! My name is Yuna Linforce! I am the Student Council President of Demeter Academy!"
"I see."
"Yes!"
‘Student council president, huh.’
"……."
"……."
The girl, who'd been stiff as a board, suddenly launched into a full self-introduction, and I gave a small nod.
A brief silence passed between us.
"Is that all you had to say?"
"Ah, n-no! It's not that…. Ahem. I came to find out what you intend to do at this academy! You must certainly be a villain!"
I looked at her. Black hair down to her shoulders, bright blue eyes full of alertness. A calm-looking face at first glance…. which made the sheer politeness of her accusation all the more striking.
"Do I look like a villain to you?"
"It's not good to suspect someone of being a villain!"
"And yet?"
"But Demeter Academy is desperately poor! The overgrowth is so bad it's literally a jungle, the buildings are ancient, and there's no income coming in whatsoever! Truly, deeply poor!"
"Hm…. A rather unfortunate academy."
"But it is my beloved alma mater! I ask that you not look down on it!"
Good grief, honestly.
"And yet?"
"It doesn't make sense that anyone would open a new stall at an academy like this—I heard about it from a professor today! No matter how I think about it, something is off! No one would open a shop like that unless they wanted to starve to death! So I became suspicious!"
‘Well, she's not wrong about that.’
"What exactly did you suspect?"
"This academy may lack everything else, but it is remarkably convenient for hiding information. That's why I worried—could this be the place where an evil organization or a dark society, like Bloody Road, might be setting up a research facility?! That's what I was afraid of!"
"I see. So you came alone?"
"Because I'm the Student Council President. I can't put the students in danger."
"Did you contact anyone?"
"I didn't. I didn't want to worry anyone."
"Let's say I actually am stronger than you, and that I really was dispatched from that Bloody Road place you mentioned."
"Yes."
"If I were to subdue you right here, right now—who would even know you were gone?"
"Huh?"
The girl—Yuna Linforce—only then seemed to grasp what kind of situation she'd put herself in, and raised her sword.
"Don't let the tip tremble. Is this your first time in a real fight?"
"N-no, it isn't. I have a history of cutting down monsters, I ha-have…!"
‘She really can't bring herself to lie, can she….What an interesting creature.’
I walked toward her. The trembling sword came angling toward me.
"Can you thrust?"
"If, if you're truly a villain…. for the sake of this academy, I can. I, I am…!"
As Yuna thrust her sword forward, my hand moved faster—I slapped her wrist, and there was a soft thud as the sword hit the ground.
I picked it up and looked at her.
"Now then. This sword is mine."
"That's cowardly! G-give it back!"
Seeing her cry out with tears welling in her eyes, I couldn't help but laugh.
"Fine, I'll give it back."
Before she could even register what was happening, I slid the sword back into its scabbard. Click. The moment it snapped into place, she stared at me wide-eyed.
"H-how…. In an instant…?"
"Skill gap."
Right.
Moving faster than she could perceive to sheath the sword—cutting her throat would have been far quicker. In other words, Yuna had just died to me once.
"Ah…. I'm as good as dead. I'm sorry. For being completely useless…."
"Yes, yes. The fight's over, so sit down. Let's have something to eat."
"Hm…?"
"I told you, didn't I? This is a stall, and I'm someone who runs a food shop."
At my words, Yuna blinked a few times, then tilted her head.
"You didn't say that."
“Did I not?”
.
.
.
.
We began talking in an atmosphere that had become considerably more relaxed.
Though that might just have been my imagination.
Yuna kept glancing between the sword at her hip and me, maintaining a slight distance.
"So you really did open a stall here…?"
‘Is this guy serious? ‘That was the look Yuna Linforce was giving me.
"No. I was about to."
"Ah. So you cancelled it. Very wise."
"The stall collapsed before I could open it."
"What?!"
"Do you see that pile of rubble over there? That was going to be my shop."
"All I see is rubble!"
"That's right."
"I'm so sorry…."
A shadow fell over Yuna's face. I'm not quite sure why she was the one apologizing.
"Even so, I'm a cook, so I can cook. Eat up."
I pulled out the well-fried tteok, skewered them on a wooden stick, sprinkled a little salt and sugar over them, and held it out to the student council president.
She momentarily went blank-eyed and reached a hand toward the tteok skewer—but then stopped herself with a desperate effort.
"If this is a stall, you're someone who sells things, aren't you?"
"That's right."
"I have no money! And I can't accept something for free from someone whose shop has just collapsed. A righteous student council president cannot do such a thing!"
Even as she said all that, her stomach went grooowl.
‘My goodness. A remarkably conscientious creature.’
I gave the tteok skewer a slow wave—up, down, side to side—right in front of her, and her eyes followed it perfectly.
"Do you want some?"
"Yes!"
"Can't tell a lie, can you."
"Because that is justice…."
The grooowling only grew louder—loud enough to reach my ears quite clearly.
"This is incredibly delicious, you know."
"I, it certainly looks it…. It really does…."
Compressed carbohydrates, fried in oil, then coated in salt and sugar.
A pure act of culinary violence. No member of the human species can resist this flavor.
"Want one?"
"Yes."
"How righteous. Have one."
Upholding conscience, speaking of justice, and still unable to overcome one's own desire.
Still rough around the edges, but…. She has every quality it takes to become an outstanding adventurer.
"I don't have money…."
"Originally, you know, when a shop opens, it hands out samples and tastings. Here. Take it as a free sample."
"I, if you put it that way…. Thank you very much!"
She received the tteok skewer I offered her with both hands and took a bite. It was clearly very hot, and she puffed air in her mouth around it—but then chewed carefully several times and swallowed.
"Ah…. Aah…. Sniff."
"Delicious enough to bring tears?"
"Y-yes hehee…!"
At my question, the student council president nodded vigorously, tears streaming freely down her face.
"It's delicious. Sniff…. Hic…. The outside is crispy and the inside is chewy, and the combination of salt and sugar hits both savory and sweet at the same time. You could just keep eating it. But if you eat it in the middle of the night, you'd definitely gain weight. It's delicious. It tastes sinful. I've never had food like this before. Sniff. Hic…. Sniff."
"……."
She wasn't just crying because it was tasty. Her assessment was actually quite accurate.
She was expressing it vividly within the bounds of what she'd experienced, and even giving it a scored evaluation.
And yet the tears still wouldn't stop.
An interesting creature.
Before I knew it, I was smiling.
"Would you like another?"
"Yes! Thank you so much!"
Sharing tteok skewers on a moonlit night.
This was my first meeting with the righteous Student Council President, Yuna Linforce.
Footnote: