Lewd King's Bucket List

'Now, now, I'm a little disappointed!'

These were his soldiers — soldiers of Catatran — yet he sneaked in so easily?!

'My… maybe my words have a little more truth to them than I thought.'

Perhaps Ixion would be their only hope in defense.

'They're bums without me!'

Ixion slipped out of Veritas' body and checked to make sure it was smashed against the bed of the wagon as tightly as possible and in the weirdest position he could imagine.

Unless someone decided to remove all the boxes, which wouldn't happen until they arrived at Fort Luminara, he'd remain hidden.

Also assuming the wagon didn't get overturned on their journey to the fort.

While the Scourge was "deadlier" than a typical beast, that was only due to the mark of infection, which could kill with a drop. Typical beasts had the Scourge far outclassed in terms of shiftiness, brutality, and savagery.

At the head carriage, Julius stood talking with the commander of the operation — the one leading this expedition — Count Tristan, brother of the nefarious apple stealer.

Julius bowed, and Ixion watched as he turned and removed the entrance fold of the canvas to the head wagon, revealing Illium, Reina, and two others sitting there. All four were fastening their helmets.

'Ah, it seems like they'll be leaving soon.'

Even if one wasn't facing a Scourge, where they'd appear was never set in stone. One always had to be prepared.

Ixion's soul spun and returned to Catatran.

First, he found himself hovering above the naked sentry. A little to his left, another sentry was sprinting in his direction, having finally noticed them.

'I guess I should buy time until they leave…'

If something like this was discovered, they might delay departure until the mystery was solved.

Ixion's soul slipped into the wretched man's body, easily taking it over.

'Ah… how nasty.'

It never felt good housing a vessel which was once home to a foul, despicable soul.

Having only died recently, with no wounds to boot, the man's body was still in good shape. Ixion didn't have to snap it out of rigor mortis.

The sentry eventually made it to them.

"Gerald! Are you okay?!"

Ixion yawned and sat up, pretending to have been asleep. Then he said to the man:

"I love men."

The sentry halted his sprint.

"H-huh?!"

Ixion sprawled on the ground.

"Who else could knock me out with their ramming touches? Oh, lord, oh gods!"

"Gerald… what…?"

"You should have seen the way his fingers went inside of me — it felt like he was touching my very soul, yes. I was penetrated so deeply! On a level a woman could never reach."

Ixion couldn't see the sentry's face, but whoever it was, they were wildly confused.

Yet it seemed as he looked at Gerald, sprawled out in his undergarments — undergarments with a little wet stain by the crotch — he'd 'discerned' what had happened.

"Oh, gods…"

Ixion himself didn't discriminate against same-sex coupling; a few of his lives had been lesbian or gay. But he knew the people of Catatran didn't tend to see the practice fondly.

The sentry took his helmet off and threw it to the side. Tears welled in the guy's eyes as he fell to his knees.

"Gerald…"

The sentry began to shake.

"H-how? How could you?! Did our love mean nothing?!"

Gerald's (Ixion's) eyes went wide.

'What…?'

"All those sleepless nights! The vow to run away together! Taking the same job to be closer to you throughout the day… And you betray me like this?! Why, Gerald, why?!"

In all honesty, Ixion was gagged. But…

But…

He couldn't help but play along.

"It's just not the same between us anymore. I like big men, like the King. You just… couldn't satisfy me."

'What the fuck am I doing?'

"You think I don't know that?!"

Ixion laughed, then propped himself up.

"Well, it's much too late for sorry."

"Y-you're right." The young man with short brown hair growled. "You're damn right!"

A moment later, the sentry descended upon Gerald, grabbing him by the collarbone and yanking him to his feet. Then… he threw him over the wall.

A sequence Ixion made no effort to resist. Instead…

'A cover story!'

He rarely cared for one since his kills were 'untraceable.' Untraceable to those who didn't know his ability. Either way…

Ixion slipped from the man's body during the freefall, letting it smack into the ground below and bend in every which way.

The sentry began to cry as he peeked down.

"What have I just done…"

As much as Ixion wanted to finish watching the melodrama, he had a task for the day. He was going to enter Despair's home again.

This time… he had a plan. A plan to enter the Memory Realm without having to attach his soul to a thrall.

In fact, it was an obvious solution, but it was as obvious as it was dumb…

Ixion had been worried that if he ordered a thrall with [Noble] to return to Despair, the man would have seen something was up — that Ixion had snuck in; however…

Finding the nearest isolated thrall, Ixion possessed a passerby. A young man traveling 'home' after obtaining a loaf of stale bread. After suppressing the man's soul so he'd forget all that happened, Ixion approached the thrall, engaged [Noble], and ordered:

"Go tell Despair he sucks."

The patrol turned and began walking toward a house of horrors.

Then, Ixion's soul fled, looking for another thrall and another nearby passerby.

"Go tell Despair he smells like shit."

Jumping from body to body and approaching a plethora of Despair's minions, he gave them all a similar order.

"Go tell Despair nobody loves him."

It was the perfect plan.

Despair would expect this kind of petty retaliation to his provocation at the Palace earlier. Therefore, he'd be none the wiser to Ixion's true motives.

After commanding nearly twenty thralls to all go insult Despair, he picked one and slid inside, hitching a free ride to the Memory Realm.