173 — Everything Happens for a Reason
Eun Ha's POV:
Eun Ha woke up with a violent lurch, drenched in sweat, her lungs and heart struggling against her ribs and failing at the simplest task that was breathing. She sat up, gasping and blinking away tears.
By the time her breaths had calmed and she looked up and around to find that she was finally awake, the world coming into focus in a much brighter, less vibrant view, the dream and its contents and her reactions to it were already long gone, swept into the deepest and darkest recesses of her subconscious.
Eun Ha collapsed on the pillows, sweat mingling with dried tears and heat still radiating from her skin, she lay on her side to let the air from her fan dry them up.
"Mom? Are you okay?" Su Ah's worried tone pulled her out of a slight daze. The girl was sitting at the edge of the bed, likely in the process of changing the wet cloth. She must've come to check on her, and just so happened to walk in on her waking up from a nightmare.
She had a bowl of water on the nightstand, ready to soak the cloth she had already placed over her mother's forehead.
"I'm fine." Eun Ha's voice came out hoarse as she turned her head, eyes adjusting to the morning light streaming into the room. "Just... a dream."
Su Ah's eyes, a deep, familiar blue, studied her face.
"A nightmare?" Her daughter's eyebrows furrowed, her hand pausing mid-air. "You were screaming."
"Ah..." Eun Ha closed her eyes, not wanting to recall the details.
"A really bad one, from the sounds of it." Su Ah added quietly.
"Sorry for scaring you." Eun Ha mumbled, a wave of shame washing over her. "It was just... it's been a while since I've been sick, maybe my brain is just messing with me."
Su Ah didn't press further, but Eun Ha could feel her daughter's gaze linger on her.
"Well... sorry for walking in on you like this. I did knock, but you didn't answer." Su Ah said, her tone a little awkward. "I just wanted to see if you needed anything."
Eun Ha gave a weak nod. "It's fine. I appreciate it, honey."
Su Ah nodded, placing the damp cloth back on her forehead. "Your fever feels like it's gone down a little." She murmured, more to herself than to her mother. "At least you're not shivering anymore."
The door creaked open again, and Mia peeked in, her expression a mixture of concern and relief. "You're awake!"
Eun Ha gave her daughters a reassuring smile. "Yep! At least, mostly."
Mia released a low exhale as she approached the other side of the bed. "That's such a relief to hear, Mom. I've been so worried."
"No worries, little troublemaker." She took Mia's hand, which had reached out and curled around her fingers. "You know me. This old lady is indestructible."
Mia smirked, shaking her head fondly.
"Still... are you feeling better?" She asked.
Eun Ha's lips trembled into something resembling a smile. Did it feel as false to them as it did to her? The dream had a visceral impact on her; she'd woken up damn horny too.
"Quit fussing so much, girls..." She managed, her throat dry, patting Mia's fingers while the other rested on the cover, clutching it tight. The silk felt inadequate armor against her own daughters. They had been there. Watching. Wait, no. That was the dream. "I just need some time and I'll be good as new, see?"
The phrase felt foolish on her tongue, because the sickness was rooted deeper than the flu. She was not fully 'good as new,' and might never be, really.
Brief recollections of Jae-il's mouth on her—
She bit the thought off sharply, willing the memory back into the sickness-fueled realm it belonged. Just keep smiling. They couldn't hear how loudly your conscience was screaming, could they?
They couldn't possibly know what she'd dreamt.
It wasn't real.
None of it was real.
The dream had been about a mother and son on a spaceship, that was all she could really recall from it. Yes. That was it. Nothing else. There was no other scene.
No.
None.
Mia and Su Ah seemed to buy her feigned recovery.
Eun Ha, in a fit of sweaty fluster, decided to redirect their attention to something else. "Umh... where's Jae-il?"
Mia and Su Ah exchanged a look before speaking in eerie unison. "Practice."
"Ah." Eun Ha tried to hide her disappointment. It was so... weird too. Disappointment for what, exactly? To not be able to talk to him after the whole ordeal of feverish delusion and unsightly dreaming? That he hadn't been here?
After all the nonsense she'd seen in that damn movie, the last person in the world she ought to see was her own son.
"He'll be back this afternoon." Su Ah added, putting an extra blanket atop her. "And now, you must rest so you can recover fully. I'll have your breakfast brought up shortly."
Eun Ha quietly nodded.
Su Ah stood up and tugged on Mia's sleeve, indicating her to move. However, Mia made no motion to stand up from the bed. Su Ah shook her head and slowly left them.
"Mia?" Eun Ha asked once her elder daughter didn't budge or talk for some time.
There were words on her tongue, questions, accusations, and lots more.
"Nothing." Mia said, eyes flitting between the sheets and her mother. Her hesitation spoke volumes; something was surely up. "I, umh..." She hesitated before continuing. "Are you really okay, Mom?"
"....."
Eun Ha blinked. "Huh, what do you mean, honey?"
Her mind was still foggy, the edges of her thoughts blurred by the fever that was slowly retreating but hadn't fully surrendered. She looked at Mia. Really looked at her.
Her daughter sat on the edge of the mattress. Her posture was relaxed, legs crossed, hands resting on her knees.
"I mean..." Mia tilted her head to the side. Her blonde hair fell over one shoulder. "You've been... intense. Lately." She said, a slight hesitation in her tone. "Even before you got sick."
"Intense?" Eun Ha shifted, propping herself up against the headboard. "I've been the same as always."
"......"
Eun Ha had an inkling as to what Mia might've been referencing.
And indeed, she had been worried sick about that too, but she had been admittedly a little swept away by Jae-il's return and all it entailed—she was still doing therapy and didn't have a lot of confidence in facing him and sorting out any sort of tension, sexual or not, that he might have (willingly or not) presented towards her.
She didn't even know how she'd ever confront Mia over that, if her fears turned out to be true. Probably weep on Dr. Han's shoulders, as that woman was the only one who knew.
However, considering how close she felt to collapsing at any given time, she decided she'd deal with that after fully getting well again, which meant Mia would have to wait on the questions too. "Yes, the same as always." She repeated firmly.
Mia let out a soft sigh.
Then she smiled, scooted closer on the bed, and wrapped Eun Ha in a hug. "As long as you're okay... I don't want to see you... suffering... you know. If something is bothering you, just tell me. I'll make it go away. I promise." She said, squeezing her gently. "Please..."
The embrace, so sincere and caring, felt like it could shatter her to pieces. It was easy to forget the real Mia could be like that; not that she was always snarky or rude. But when she went and showed this kind of care and affection, she tended to go all out.
Eun Ha bit her bottom lip and returned the hug. At least she could easily hug her daughters without feeling a damn thing but platonic love, unlike her son.
A wave of guilt rose from the depths of her chest. She was a terrible mother.
"Thank you, Mia. I will."
Mia pulled back after a moment, her smile brighter. "Well, good."
Eun Ha watched her eldest daughter walk towards the door. She hesitated at the threshold, her hand on the doorknob. She turned to face her mother one last time.
"Mom?"
"Yes, honey?"
"Rest up." Mia said softly. "We need you."
Then she was gone.
The door closed with a soft click.
Eun Ha sank back into the pillows. With a low groan, she rolled over, facing the windows and the rising sun. She could smell breakfast wafting up from the kitchen.
She listened to her daughter's fading footsteps. She sighed, exhausted, the dream still so fucking vivid. If she focused hard enough, she could almost 'feel' dream Jae-il crawling underneath her blankets. His hands tracing her curves, touching her so intimately as she forcefully pushed his head between her legs.
She touched her breast, pinching gently. It was sensitive. The lower half of her body tingled, aching pleasantly. She slipped her fingers between her legs and found a burgeoning wetness.
He really...
Did all that to her.
Without even knowing...
Not even having an iota of a clue.
Despite not remembering anything in specific detail from that fever-induced dream, the consequences and effects it had wrought in reality were, well, real, and now here she was, horny.
Her thighs squeezed tightly at the memory of his tongue dragging all over her labia, but she shoved it back into the box she'd just opened inside her subconscious and quickly locked it up, hoping not to ever reopen it.
