Chapter 138: Breakfast
Claire just stood there. Her lungs seemed to have forgotten how to function.
He just told her that the most beautiful thing she had seen in her life wasn’t about her.
Whoever the woman was, he was in love with her... enough to write such endearing things about her.
Her heart was shattering faster than she could think.
"Who... who was it for?" The tremor in her voice betrayed her.
"I should remind you that it is none of your concern."
The way he spoke to her sent shivers down her spine.
She took a step back, crashing into the hard, yet comforting wall behind her.
"Excuse me."
She turned and stumbled out of the large room before the tears that blurred her vision spilled out.
She was in love with him - it was crystal clear.
Did loving someone hurt this much?
She stopped outside, paying no heed to the guards that stood her. Her composure was nothing but dust - she couldn’t even get a word out without her voice cracking desperately.
Part of her was hoping that he’d come after her. But that was wishful thinking - which was much worse.
Her olive-skinned guard stepped forward and gave her an embroidered handkerchief to wipe her eyes.
She glanced up at him.
Things had been tense between them since that night at the garden - he never came too close, he always stopped by her door, never spoke to her... it was almost as if he was a quiet presence she wasn’t supposed to acknowledge.
She started walking away after taking the kerchief from him and murmuring her appreciation.
The sound of his quiet, yet lethal footsteps behind her offered more comfort than his words ever could.
’Yeren is just using you’, a wicked voice in her head repeated to her in a sing-song voice. He was in love with someone else.
And that ’someone’ wasn’t her.
It never will be.
Her steps increased in pace. She needed to go somewhere the air didn’t taste bitter.
Then she collided head first into something hard.
When she looked up, she met Andon.
This time, he didn’t walk past her, he actually stopped.
"Miss Stenly?"
She paused as well, not bothering to wipe the evidence of her heartbreak on her face.
"An...Andon." She breathed.
His eyes burned with questions, but instead of bombarding her with them, he closed the distance between them and pulled her into his arms.
She stiffened at the contact, but melted into his embrace.
It was almost as if he was in need of an embrace as much as she was.
As if he perfectly understood how it felt to be in her shoes.
Her hands, which hung limply at her sides, moved and rested on his back.
He held her for a while longer before pulling away.
"We both needed that." His voice was low, just for her ears.
But there was no mistaking the sadness behind it.
Claire pushed her own problems aside and focused on him, really looked at him.
"Tell me what happened."
He took a step back and ran a hand through his already messy hair.
"I’d rather not burden you with that. Have a nice day, Miss-"
She blocked his path as he made to escape.
"What verdict did the King decide? I understand that the court session hasn’t been held yet."
Andon nodded slowly. "It hasn’t. And there wouldn’t be a court proceeding on my behalf. My punishment has already been decided and the council will be informed at the King’s discretion."
His punishment?
"What punishment?"
He averted his gaze, his jaw tensing.
"I have been exiled from Reden for a year... I will be forced to live in the South like an outlaw, banished from my home."
Her breathing stilled, then caught in her throat.
"Exiled?" She repeated the wire as if saying it out loud would make it more real.
He nodded slowly, the gesture reeking of quiet acceptance.
"But it’s just for a year, not a lifetime." The words tumbled out, hoping to comfort him even if she knew that nothing she said would achieve that.
"If a fortnight away from home can change a man, a year away from everything he cares about can do much worse."
Claire clasped her hands in front of herself and sighed loudly.
"I would love to join you on your journey to the South. But... he won’t let me leave."
Andon said nothing. He just plastered a smile they both knew was fake on his face, bowed slightly and left her.
Claire stood there for a while, wondering as to his sudden departure.
Did he know something, but chose not to tell her?
As she reached the stairs that led up to her tower, a court attendant approached her.
"Miss Stenly."
She finally had the decency to wipe her eyes.
"Yes?"
"Please there is a council meeting being held... and er... the King has requested your presence."
What did he want her for? To serve wine, or to see how much he’d affected her.
A better part of her wanted to decline, to make it known to him that she had no intention of being humiliated a second time.
But the other part of her reminded her that she was just a servant.
His servant.
Nothing else, nothing more.
Claire glanced down at her dress and pulled the bodice down slightly.
"I will be there shortly." She said clearly, her tone dismissive.
The attendant nodded hesitantly and slowly backed away.
Claire watched him leave before mounting the arduous steps that led to her bedchamber.
Once in her room, she closed the door and leaned against it.
And she finally remembered how to breathe properly.
Her sole aim of coming back was to fix her composure. But being in her room, being grounded in the place that had become her solace for the past month, she felt whatever was left of her composure disintegrate.
She slid to the floor and wrapped her knees with her hands, the folds of her dress tangled beneath her.
Why was he keeping her if he loved someone else? She’d felt something in his kiss before he pulled away - she couldn’t be mistaken.
How could he be so passionate with her when his heart belonged to another?