Chapter 97: You’ll Get Used to It
Gifts?
One could only say that Zhang Fei was expecting too much. They were just here to get a free meal from him.
Cao Dongdong and the others had spent half the night enjoying themselves at the White Crystal Inn, then spent another half searching for Zhang Fei. They were brimming with energy despite being up all night, and they came over to ask what Zhang Fei had been up to the previous night.
“Brother San! Brother San! Come out quickly, we’re here to congratulate you!”
“Lady Gao.”
“What Lady Gao, you should call her Madam Zhang.”
“Madam Zhang.”
…
As soon as Zhang Fei returned home, he heard their raucous shouting.
“It’s early in the morning, why are you making such a racket?” Zhang Fei walked over with a stern face. Without any gifts, why should he be pleasant towards them?
“Zhang San!”
Cao Dongdong appeared with a leap, landing in front of Zhang Fei and placing a hand on his shoulder. “Zhang San, you lied to me.”
Zhang Fei asked, “Lied about what?”
Cao Dongdong replied, “You said you were inexperienced.”
Zhang Fei, surprised, asked, “How do you… cough, what do you mean?”
Cao Dongdong huffed, “Don’t take me for a fool. What kind of inexperienced man would choose to do it outdoors? If you can’t do it lying down, how can you manage standing up?”
“Outdoors?” Zhang Fei was puzzled.
Cao Dongdong sneered, “Going out with a widow in the middle of the night, who would believe that?”
Zhang Fei shot back, “Outdoors? You don’t know what you’re talking about. That was clearly a carriage ride.”
“Car… carriage ride?” Cao Dongdong blinked, pondering, “So that’s what it’s called?”
His eyes lit up, “Marvelous! Marvelous! What a term! Carriage ride. Haha!”
The more he thought about it, the more he liked it.
Beast! Zhang Fei cursed inwardly but couldn’t help but envy him. It would have been nice if it had been a carriage ride. Damn it, all those bullets, wasted!
What a tragic joke!
Ma Xiaoyi chuckled, “Still, Big Brother is clever. As soon as he heard you didn’t go home, he knew what you were up to, and he came looking for a good… mmph!”
Before he could finish, Cao Dongdong jumped over and covered his mouth.
Zhang Fei realized, “So you were looking for me last night to watch a live performance. I thought you were really worried about me.”
Cao Dongdong quickly said, “We were, of course we were. I was just afraid you wouldn’t know what to do and wanted to teach you a few moves. Quickly, bring out the bride and let us see if she’s even more beautiful now.”
Zhang Fei said, “She was up most of the night and is resting now, don’t disturb her.”
Cao Dongdong looked Zhang Fei up and down.
Zhang Fei was annoyed, “What’s that look for?”
Cao Dongdong said, “All night? I don’t believe you’re that strong. Why don’t we go to Floating Fragrance Inn and compete?”
“Marvelous! Marvelous!” Ma Xiaoyi was excited, “Let me be the witness.”
Were people really this intense in this era? Zhang Fei said, “You can compete in that? Get out, I have no desire for such performances.” He quickly changed the subject, “You all came to congratulate me but bring no gifts?”
Ma Xiaoyi said, “Brother San, we spent nearly two thousand strings last night for you, and the arrangements were all handled by us. You still expect us to bring gifts?”
Last night, Zhang Fei had taken the beauty and left, and all the formalities were handled by Cao Dongdong and the others.
“Exactly!”
Cao Dongdong said, “I even played the matchmaker for you. Shouldn’t I at least get a drink?”
Spending fifteen hundred strings for a near-death experience and only getting to hold hands once—this wasn’t matchmaking but bad luck!
Zhang Fei quickly ordered Li Si to buy some wine to entertain them.
However, these guys were just the beginning.
One after another, more people came to congratulate him.
“Who knew Brother San had such talent? A single poem won the beauty at White Crystal Inn. It’s been a long time since we had such a good story in Bianjing.”
Chen Maoqian cupped his hands repeatedly.
Of course, my idol’s poem is bound to be stunning. Zhang Fei cupped his hands and smiled, “Nothing, nothing. Just a small matter. Ha ha!”
Ma Tianhao, who came with him, said, “Where’s the bride? Let’s see the bride.”
Zhang Fei, looking slightly tired, said, “She was up most of the night and is resting now.”
“Most of the night?”
Ma Tianhao’s gaze was exactly the same as Cao Dongdong’s earlier.
Zhang Fei felt insulted, “If you don’t believe me, we can go to Floating Fragrance Inn and compete.”
Ma Tianhao hesitated, then laughed, “I believe you, I believe you! How could I not?”
Zhang Fei turned to Fan Yong, “Mogul Fan, there’s something I’d like to discuss with you.”
Fan Yong asked, “What is it?”
Zhang Fei said, “I like the coachman who brought me back yesterday. Could you part with him and let me have him?”
Fan Yong blinked, “Sure, but it’s hardly a sacrifice.”
A coachman? You care that much?
“Thank you.”
…
Then, Fan Li and others also came to congratulate him.
To think it was just dawn. Zhang Fei was surprised at how quickly news spread in the Northern Song.
Did it spread this fast?
The rapid spread of the news was actually all thanks to that poem.
If it was just about buying a woman, no matter how beautiful, it wouldn’t have caused a stir. But a great poem could quickly spread throughout Bianjing.
Literary circles controlled public opinion. What they liked spread fast.
Moreover, Zhang Fei’s bold declaration had stirred the literary world.
As more people came to congratulate him, the house was almost full. Zhang Fei realized for the first time how many people he knew.
Most were merchants, some of whom he had only spoken to briefly.
They understood that after winning the case against Cao Dongdong, Zhang Fei’s status had changed significantly.
At least the Cao family owed him a favor.
Once seated, they all clamored to see the bride.
Naturally, Cao Dongdong led such calls.
With no choice, Zhang Fei went to the back hall to fetch Gao Wenyin.
“What?”
Gao Wenyin’s lips parted slightly, revealing her neat white teeth. Her large, bright almond eyes were tearful as she looked at Zhang Fei.
“What ‘what’?” Zhang Fei said, “This is the truth. I did spend money to buy you.”
“I… I thought…”
The more Gao Wenyin spoke, the lower her head dropped.
Zhang Fei said, “You thought that I, being so upright, kind, and handsome, after seeing your pitiful plight and willingness to die for your husband, would grant you freedom and not force you?”
Gao Wenyin nodded rapidly, her chest heaving.
Zhang Fei smiled, “You guessed right. But you’re so gentle, understanding, and brave, that you were willing to sell yourself for your brothers. You should know that fifteen hundred strings is a large sum. Shouldn’t you repay me before deciding your fate?”
Gao Wenyin looked up at him pitifully.
Zhang Fei asked, “Am I wrong?”
Gao Wenyin nodded, “You’re right. I should repay you, but I can’t afford it.”
Zhang Fei asked, “So what should we do?”
Gao Wenyin frowned, “Fine, I’ll find a way to repay you and leave afterward.”
“Deal.”
Zhang Fei snapped his fingers, “One more thing. What role will you play while staying at my house? I can’t say I have a bunch of wanted criminals here. I’m not prepared for that, and it might alert our enemies…”
Before he finished, Gao Wenyin said, “I’ll pretend to be your wife. Just pretend.”
“Please, my wife.”
Zhang Fei stood up, gesturing towards the door.
Gao Wenyin’s cheeks flushed like the morning sun. After a moment’s hesitation, she placed her hand in his.
Zhang Fei was surprised, “What are you doing? I just asked you to step out.”
Gao Wenyin quickly withdrew her hand, her face turning redder.
Zhang Fei stifled a laugh, “Please, my wife.”
“Please.”
“You could use another term…”
“Hu… husband, please.”
Zhang Fei barely heard the end but said, “It’s okay. You’ll get used to it.”
As they reached the door, Zhang Fei suddenly called, “Wait.”
“What’s wrong?”
Gao Wenyin turned to him.
Zhang Fei thought, “Can you pretend your foot is injured and you can’t walk properly?”
Gao Wenyin asked, “Why?”
“Because… never mind. Better not fake it. It’ll be worse if they find out. Let’s go.”
…
In the front hall, as they stood together, they truly looked like a perfect couple, making the guests’ eyes light up and causing Cao Dongdong to stomp his feet in regret.
Led by Cao Dongdong, they began a round of toasts, half-jokingly and half-mockingly.
Zhang Fei accepted every drink.
Although he had never been married, he had attended many weddings. The groom’s wine was mostly diluted, a trick he knew.
Especially since the bride was a fake, he had to drink fake wine.
The guests finally left by the afternoon. The house, buzzing with people, felt truly like a home.
Zhang Fei felt content.
“Phew!”
At the door, Zhang Fei exhaled deeply, “Finally done.”
Gao Wenyin said, “Husband, I’ll go rest now.”
“Hmm, wife, rest early.”
“…!”
Both paused, then looked at each other.
Finally, Gao Wenyin fled.
“Haha…”
Zhang Fei laughed heartily.
“Looks like the groom is very happy today!”
Xu Zhiqian approached, smiling, “Are you really married or just pretending?”
Zhang Fei, annoyed, said, “You know the answer.”
Xu Zhiqian said, “But you seem very happy.”
Zhang Fei snorted, “Happy or not, if it were real, I wouldn’t have the energy to deal with these guests.”
Xu Zhiqian was curious, “What do you mean?”
“Kids shouldn’t ask too much.”
With that, he turned towards the hall.
“You’re the kid!”
Xu Zhiqian followed, looking around, “Where’s the bride?”
Zhang Fei glared at her, “Enough! I spent fifteen hundred strings for a fake wife and got into trouble. It’s maddening.”
Xu Zhiqian chuckled, “By the way, where did you copy that poem from?”
Zhang Fei eyed her, “You understand poetry?”
Xu Zhiqian huffed, “Don’t pretend. You can’t even write clearly, let alone compose such a poem.”
Zhang Fei smirked, “You don’t get it. I’m an inspiration-based talent. Stimulate my inspiration, and I can write even better.”
“Really?”
Xu Zhiqian was skeptical, “How can I stimulate your inspiration?”
Zhang Fei said, “Simple. Make me feel lustful. But…,” he eyed her, “you have no chance.”
“Rogue! Always thinking of bad ideas,” Xu Zhiqian glared at him.
“Believe it or not.”
Zhang Fei shrugged.
Xu Zhiqian, puffing up in anger, couldn’t retort, then said, “Senior Brother Wang will come to congratulate you.”
Zhang Fei asked, “When will we drink your wedding wine?”
Xu Zhiqian quickly said, “Don’t talk nonsense. We’re just senior brother and sister, nothing more.”
“Wow, why so nervous?” Zhang Fei said, “Makes it seem like we’re having an affair.”
Xu Zhiqian stood abruptly, about to retort, when a cheerful voice came from the door, “Zhang San, congratulations!”
“Oh no! Caught in the act!”