Walking Disasters and Me

My eyes slowly open alongside a full, restful breath to take in the three opulent floating manuals once more, their eagerness plain to feel through whatever connections we have. The energy is infectious as I can't help but to crack a small smile on my soul avatar before addressing them, "Hello again~. I need to start learning anything else I can before the next tribulation which I am now speed running. I know miss moon already showed me hers, but do you two have anything new?"

The question prompts a small jostling match between the soul and void manuals while a bit of a disappointed air comes from the moon one. I think I can guarantee that these three are going to become full ass people after I beat the 6th Rank tribulation, they're all just too human. The fact that I can just... ask them to show me what I need to learn is also another indication that they're either super powerful or have deep ties to past me. Likely both.

Oh well, all the more reason to treat them as such and take what they show me with my full attention. My musings are cut short by the victorious void manual as it finally maneuvers in front of my face, past the soul manual who now joins the moon in the moody corner. I giggle a little before I take the smug scroll and open it, "It's alright~. I'm not leaving here until I learn all I can this time, teachers' orders. Well, their's and the deity that's chilling out in my soul. Anywho! What do you have for me, your voidness?"

The jet-black paper suddenly flies out from its wreath, creating a small gust of wind that jostles the long hair of my soul avatar before it comes to a stop. I pick up the far end, recognizing the chant and means of [Unending Flow of the River] and the original Qi channeling technique before they got mushed into a universal one. Further down the line seems to be my prize this time though, as a single series of steps underlined by symbols and power rest next to where the paper stopped exposing itself.

The picture is fairly simple, showing a woman in a neutral styled stance holding her hand out in front of her. From her hand, however, a pitch black, circular writhing mass of energy has erupted, forming a thin barrier between her and whatever could be assailing her that seems to cover about half her body. Curious, I tilt my eyes downward to try and read the script at the bottom, but like every other time the words don't come to me straight away. I go back to studying the picture again, noticing the faint lines of silver energy that seem to represent Qi moving from inside the woman in the drawing through her hand and then out toward the shield.

The scroll stays open as I try and replicate what's on its page, placing my feet shoulder width apart, extending my hand out. All that jazz. The trouble is, unlike the new moon techniques, this one seems to be some kind of... channeled use, where I have to continually feed Qi into it. So far, all I've had to do is just pull Qi into my body and then unleash it all in one go. Or, for the strengthening techniques, I just have to activate them and then keep pulling in Qi to sustain them. But again, that's all an internal thing since they're pulling from my dantian or flow model as I'm intaking Qi.

This seems more like its telling me to transmute the Qi into void energy and then use that as a barrier. Coming up with no other alternatives at the moment, I still my mind and try focusing on doing just that. Qi pulls in from the environment outside, filling my flow model, dantian, and soul with energy as I begin consciously trying to transform the silvery light into its void configuration. The process is... hard. Qi may want to be used, but it seems to not like being forcefully changed from one elemental state to the other. Good thing I have [Qi Conversion]~.

I keep at it for what seems like hours before a frustrated groan pulls from my lips, every attempt so far yielding not even a sliver of progress. Not only is trying to transmute Qi that isn't being actively used incredibly difficult for me right now even with the system, but I also still don't have the faintest idea of how to actually push out the small bits of changed Qi that I am able to gather. Isn't that 3rd Rank territory anyway? The usage of Qi outside the flow model? Why am I trying to learn this now?! In a huff, I sit down in the space and rummage my hands through my hair in vexation.

The space around me tinges in a faint reddish hue as I mentally grumble at my own failures before I mentally sigh and take a step back. There's no reason to get upset on your first attempt, Aims. This is all super new, for everyone. Just because you aren't succeeding right now doesn't mean you won't eventually if you keep at it and stay calm. Sandra, Ios, Akiko, and all the girls believe in you, and getting frustrated and throwing in the towel after one bad experience isn't fair to them.

My soul avatar's eyes open again as I exhale out the last of my negative feelings, "Or to me." I hold my hand up in silent ask towards the void manual who dutifully complies. I re-read every square inch of the scroll, committing every little detail to memory. How the Qi is shown to move, both from the outside, internally, and then into the technique. I study how the changed Qi interacts with itself, how it melds and meshes in a distorted yet defined difference in space as protection. I even give another crack at the words, but to no one's surprise I don't have much luck there yet.

"Okay. Let's try this again." I say softly as I let the scroll hover back into the air, standing up to resume my stance once more after it floats away. By the time my soul avatar's palms are sweaty, knees weak, and arms heavy, I finally have a breakthrough. As my exhausted form groans at another failed attempt, I realize that the Qi I had changed this time didn't all get expelled from the model or absorbed back to moon Qi in my dantian. There, tracing along the pathways of the flow model are small strands of void energy, their distorted and reality breaking feel as visible as a lighthouse in the night to my internal perception.

"Oh my Heavens... Of course!!" I say out in a mix of aggravation and relief. "I don't need to transmute every single scrap of Qi that comes in and then instantly try to use it! I just need to always have that type of Qi locked and loaded for when I need it! Since the dantian seems to hold and auto-convert Qi that gets put into it into moon energy, the flow model and meridians must be like that for void! And then my soul for... well, the obvious one. Damn, why did that take me so long to figure out?!"

The joyous feelings radiating off the manuals only further solidify the concept for me as they wave and weave a merry dance in front of me. I laugh a little, giving each of them a pat on the top of their scroll case that makes the happy feelings take on a more... pink hued tone. Oh no, do they have erogenous zones as scrolls?! Why is everything on Mara so horny?!? I quickly put the thought out of mind since they can't really verify one way or the other right now, and the less things clouding my head the better for the moment.

I shoo the eager and desperate for more head pat manuals away as I get comfortable and begin pulling in Qi with the intention of trying to keep some inside me this time. It's a process, for sure, as I notice a lot of points that hold Qi as its being moved just fine, but once the energy tries to rest it either gets pulled into a meridian or spills out of the model. I sigh, mentally rolling up my sleeves as I undergo the latest tinkering of the system as a whole.

Finally, I get to the point where the meridians are humming with energy and Qi is no longer leaking out of the model like a sieve. I don't know how long the process took, but it has definitely gotten to the point that even taking a bird's eye view of the network makes a headache come on.

I deserve all the pampering after I wake up from this. And sex. Preferably with tails~. Oh! And hot chocolate! Not during the sex though, that just seems messy and a waste of a delicious beverage. And then we'd need to make cookies too! Oh wait! Do they have marshmallows??...

I shake my head a few times as the... confusing mix of yellows and pinks subside from the soul space. Maybe I should take a break? I must be a bit further gone than I thought if my brain is this scattered. Plus, I feel like a huge hypocrite now for saying Mara is too horny when my first thought for a reward is getting one of Akiko's tails all up inside me again~... Yeah. Need a break. Let's finish this part though.

I pull in as much Qi as the model seems to be able to handle on its own and then begin the process of converting it into void Qi. It takes a few refills, since it seems that it takes more neutral Qi to constitute a single void counterpart, but the [Qi Conversion] skill I have makes things a lot easier now that I know what I'm doing.

Before long, the model is awash with the hazy, flickering essence that is difficult to see and honestly still a little migraine inducing to stare at for too long. Maybe the shield can also be like a mental attack too? I'm attuned to this stuff, and it still makes my brain hurt if I just hyperfocus on it for long enough.

Questions for later, now is shield time~! Hehe~! I take the stance shown on the scroll once more, standing stoically with feet split apart at the shoulders. I raise my hand in front of my body, willing the void Qi to pull through the model, past the meridians which empower it further, and then coalesce into my palm. Like a lightning bolt, as soon as the energy reaches the center of my hand, I know what the script underneath the depiction says:

"[Aegis of the Void]."

A sundering *CRACK!* of reality blossoms from my outstretched hand, creating a thick, towering distortion of physics breaking energy that reaches well beyond my feet and head, and well past the frame of my body. Its power is immense and audibly thrumming in discordant waves of air, and my eyes widen at the drastic change from what the scroll showed to what I produced before I remember my attunements on my status page.

"So this must have been what that means, and probably why the moon techniques are also so OP that even Sam is scared of them. Especially since I had my battle dress on too. Basically, any skill or technique using void, soul, or moon are going to be buffed like crazy if and when I use them. Well, past what they're supposed to be originally..."

I mentally keep tabs on how long I can hold this technique up, both from a stamina perspective and from Qi usage. To my relief, this doesn't seem to burn stamina! To my annoyance, I am already down a quarter of all that void Qi I transmuted. I decided to let the skill burn itself out, the last distorted embers of changed energy feeding into the flickering shield before it cracks and shatters like crystalline glass, dispersing into the void from which it came.

"So, a total life of just about thirty seconds if my current model is filled? I wonder if there's more of a startup cost than channeling cost to it..." I ponder as I look down to my soul avatar's hand, flexing the numbing fingers there a few times before sensation returns to the digits. "Either way, a greatmove for defense. So long as anything is trying to attack me from pretty much any frontal angle, I should be protected. And between my own strength, the system enhancements, and the fact that its void Qi..."

My heartbeat quickens a pace as a mental image begins to play out... "I wonder if it could tank something from Akiko..." I whisper under my breath, the thought fusing and merging with my Berserker instincts to create a delightful melody of emotions inside of me~.

Another shake of my head tries to settle my mind away from further distracting thoughts. I want to get railed by Akiko, not fight her!... Right, time for that break.

As I go to stand and leave for a few, the soul manual darts directly into my face. I take a stunned step back and am about to explain that I just need a quick breather before the scroll unfurls itself before my eyes. Instead of the glyphs and pictures like the other two, the entire page alights in a blinding white light that showers the entire soul space in its radiance. As it does so, I feel my consciousness get pulled from my soul space and into the serenely white pages of the scroll.

I yell as the feeling of ground beneath my feet that I hold in the soul space is yanked from under me, my avatar plunging headfirst past the page and into a familiar room. A throne room.

With an extremely undignified cry of alarm still screaming from my mouth, I fall further and further toward the ground of the Empress' domain, my arms and legs flailing like a bird who forgot how to fly before I'm bodily stopped just before impact. A gong ripples out across the space as I turn my head to see the amused expression said deity resting on her throne as she regards me.

"Well, I did not expect to see you again so soon Amelia. I hope you are here for different reasons as your last visit." Her regal voice distorts and echoes in the chamber, something I can now process has actual tiled flooring leading to the throne itself now that I'm not freaking out.

"Maybe." I huff upside-down and cross my arms as I turn my head and take in the space in full. "Like what you've done with the place. The checkerboard black and white floor tile pattern fits the space well, although you'll need something to offset the gold and purple of your banners eventually."

My eyes land on hers once again, seeing them lightly squinted in amusement before she raises her hand and beckons towards my floating form. In a gentle pull, I'm brought through the air towards her until I am sitting on her lap on the throne. I squirm a bit, still not entirely comfortable being so... intimate with her but she raises a hand and snaps a finger before I can protest anything.

At the end of the snap, we are both overlooking an amber rocked canyon, various layers of different gray and black rock from the passing of ages etched onto every earthen wall and divot. Shrubs and pine trees surround the rim of the gorge that we stand on, as well as the valley floor below along with grouped and isolated spires of rounded rock all coming to form gorgeous plinths and natural arches. Snow blankets the ground in various patches that the sunlight can penetrate through the pine needles, creating a picturesque scene worthy of a postcard. Instantly, I recognize where we are.

"Bryce Canyon..." I whisper reverently, a hand coming to cover my mouth as tears sting and press their way from my eyes, splashing their salty liquid onto my fingers below.

"Indeed." The Empress says as she gently presses me down toward a seat that hadn't been there before, taking her own next to mine once the task is accomplished. "Your old world, Earth, had many wonderous natural environs. The beauty of nature protected and kept by man, as best you could with the means available. At least, so it remains so in your memory."

"Yeah..." I quietly remark as I struggle to dry my eyes on the back of my hands, "Mom and dad loved taking Sandy and I out west when we were little. Here, Zion, the Grand Canyon. Basically, anywhere a river ran through some rock in the past. We couldn't afford to go often and stopped going at all after my mental health started hitting their pocketbooks, but all I remember of this place is just the... majesty of it. Feeling so small yet so in tune with everything. Like, even though I am here now, I know that someone thousands of years ago had the exact same reaction I was having to seeing such a breathtaking sight at the elegance of nature. I wish we could have gone again..."

A pressure pulls on my shoulder as I shudder out a cry, squeezing and patting me a few times before I turn to see the Empress giving me a compassionate smile of reassurance and I collect myself. "Ugh. Sorry. Just a lot of homesickness back-to-back lately. I just never feel like I have time to process anything right now. That I just have to keep moving forward and cope as best I can. Shit, I don't even know why I'm telling you all of this! I just... its been a lot. It keeps being a lot."

"You are handling it well, Amelia." The voice of the Empress sings out in harmony amongst the canyon walls, creating an almost ethereal aspect to it in the moment. "I know we are not on such terms that you would call me a friend. I can still sense the distrust in you for myself, something I cannot fault you for. I shall keep trying to prove that feeling unwarranted, that you and your sister are safe. Regardless of that, I hope you do trust me when I say as a person who has lived a vast, almost incalculable amount of time, that you are doing well and beyond what anyonewould ever think possible in your circumstance."

She leans back as she looks out onto the view, a serene air about her as she continues, "In terms of cultivation, you are single handedly rewriting the term genius, even for transmigrators. In terms of growth, you are far and away a different person from that shadow of a woman who landed on this planet. In terms of purpose, you are nearly single handedly bringing about the restoration of your sister and soulmate. In terms of immersion, you are but a few steps away from being a full, intertwined member of an elite harem of this world's strongest cultivators."

She turns to face me again, the smile still on her face but its... softer and more heartfelt feeling than before, "It can be so easy to lose yourself in the tide of the things that need doing. To fail to remember all of your accomplishments that led you to those boisterous waters in the first place. But keeping yourself whole and your mind steady means looking forward as well as looking back. To accept the person you once were, to accept that you have changed, and to accept that you will change in the future, so long as your core beliefs do not change. So long as you remain true to yourself and to those you love, you should not be afraid to be who you are and feel what you feel."

I cast my eyes downwards, my head following suit as we sit there in silence for a few moments. Eventually, her voice rings back out as I'm pondering her words, the words that Ios and Akiko also seem to say to me, "You are here, by the way, because you cannot learn the next techniques of the soul manual yet."

"What?!"