Perversions of the Flesh

“Well, I know I’m well protected now.” Minnie was staring back at the treeline. She’d only suffered minor scratches, which Bren healed away.

The second leg of forest fighting was really more of the same. Keit and Minnie were leading, protected by Bren, while Kat and Ann took care of breaking through anything ahead of them and protecting the rear. Rosalyn was death to anything she could get at, but Lucia struggled. With the creature’s body being so nebulous, her weapon was simply not suited to the fight.

Or at least, Ann had thought so. Her new skill to leave behind traps was being used to great effect. She’d plant a bullet in the ground with enough time for them to get free. Once they were, the thing would go up in a fireball to burn away vines. Her snare bullets were less effective, but they slowed things down. That was what they needed right now. Delays. Ann hadn’t been entirely sure how well a trapper would be for their constant habit of running into unknown territory, but she was realising her imagination was lacking here.

“Aye, an’ we’re probably goin’ tae ‘ave tae get through it again on the way back,” Kat grumbled darkly. “Damn thing never actually showed itself. Rosalyn, ye know anythin’ about this thing?”

Rosalyn was petting Keit, making soft soothing sounds. She didn’t stop stroking the creature’s head and ears as she replied. “A dozen and more. Roots, vines, willowy branches, there are so many Warped that use plants and their appendages like this that it’s hard to narrow down. I’ve heard of some using magic to reanimate corpses, or inhabit them like we saw with the bees, but this many bodies with that much control is insane. I haven’t heard of anything that has this much reach and power. If I were to guess, there’s a core somewhere in the forest that’s controlling all of this, and if we could get that, it’d kill the whole thing, but finding it and getting there are the hard parts. If we could fly, it’d be easier since it seems like a ground-bound creature but if it’s also going around with the Warped that’s hunting us I think it’ll have protections against anything flying over it not that any of us can fly but I could kinda launch myself over if I wanted to but I don’t know if I’d be able to land safely.”

Bren and Kat nodded along. “Understood. We avoid the creature for now. Taking it out will require numbers, and numbers that do not die to the creature and reinforce its power.”

“That’s what’s bothering me,” Ann mumbled. “Why’s it using bodies? Couldn’t it just wrap us all up and kill us? It could move decently quickly even for me.”

“Warped ‘re feckin weird,” Kat shrugged. She was still staring darkly at the forest, sword at her side. The woman was tense and would remain tense until they’d established some safety. “I feel like they do it tae be terrifyin’ on purpose.”

“Effective. Shock demoralises. Fear routs. Good tactic.” Lucia, as well, had her weapon out and was staring daggers at the woods. Her hood had been knocked free somewhere in the scramble, and her plumage was glittering in the light like it really was metal.

Bren picked his pack up from where he’d left it during the short rest. “Well, nothing for it now, we are past the danger. It is time to move on. The sun is low, and I would prefer to be further away.”

Everyone was enthusiastically in favour of his suggestion, and spirits rose as they left behind the tangle of fear.

Once the sun set, they made camp. Kat and Minnie set up the tents while Ann started the fire. Lucia went out to both scout and set up the six sound bugs. They’d make… actually, Ann had no idea what sound they’d make, but they’d make a loud one if anything tripped the perimeter.

“You all do this all the time, huh?” Minnie asked, sitting heavily on the rock next to Ann. She pried a shard free and started fiddling with it.

“Since I woke up here, so yeah, pretty much,” Ann shrugged, poking at the fire to get it heating up. “I woke up in a ruin, so camps are an improvement as far as I’m concerned.”

“Arse naked, too,” Kat laughed from inside the tent.

Rosalyn set out their meal for the night and started preparing everything. “Wish I could have seen that. The way Kat describes it, you looked magical.”

“Clothes are an improvement, too. I could replicate it for you, Lambchop. Only takes a pile of snow and far less clothes.”

“Bren caught a look, too!” Kat said, ducking out of the tent. “So it’s just you an’ Lucia who missed the divine gift in the snow.”

“You still alright with all that divine meddling?” Ann had been biting back her concern about that. It was time for a quick check-in.

“It’s more o’ a problem wit’ not knowin’ about ‘ow much they’re messin’ wit’ all o’ us. Even if it’s nudges. Eh, easier not tae think about. Just payin’ attention tae urges an’ feelin’s now.” Kat took a seat next to Minnie, handing the woman a cup of water. “Sorry, big talk fer just joinin’ us.”

“I… listen, I’m not going to pretend to know anything about you all, but you talk very flippantly about the Gods. I don’t worship them, no, but isn’t there some common sense?”

“When you have Orenous show up as several naked women, get a bunch of weird information from her, then also dumped into the far future, you kinda stop seeing the Gods as Gods and more of people with a ton of power.” Ann had also been mulling over how to explain this for a bit. She was pretty much the most important person in Orenous’s religion, and explaining why she would sometimes talk shit about the Goddess was going to come up.

[Chosen Puppy]: Hey, you don’t mind me treating you like a normal person, right? Like, yeah, you’re still my patron Goddess, but should I be pretending to be reverent?

[Bestest Goddess]: Respect is earned for those who work to obtain it. Seek your answers within yourself.

A second later.

[Bestest Goddess]: Hey, sorry, was working on… a lot. You have no idea how much melodrama I get to process at all times. Try to keep the image up for the commons, please. Order’s important for people to find guidance in chaos and feel welcome. For everyone who knows what’s up, though? I don’t mind.

[Chosen Puppy]: Is there a reason your auto responses are bad fortune cookies?

[Bestest Goddess]: No. It’s just how my, uh…

There was a pause. Kat was talking to Minnie about armour and what weapons she’d made. Rosalyn was frying some sausages on a skillet as Bren caught up on notes for the day. Lucia stalked back and sat down, then started getting her armour off.

[Bestest Goddess]: Sorry, it’s weird and complicated. I’m in so many different places at once. It’s like if your brain’s on autopilot and you’re not thinking about what you say. That’s my version of it. Self-help quotes.

[Chosen Puppy]: Fair. Any chance of a visit to go over gripes?

[Bestest Goddess]: Not now. Soon. Promise I’m not dodging this. If things go as I foresee them, it should be before you head into the mountain.

[Chosen Puppy]: Hey, that’s better than nothing.

[Bestest Goddess]: Why didn’t you change your name? OH! Do you like being the puppy! Cute!

[Chosen Puppy]: YOU NEVER TOLD ME HOW! FORTUNE COOKIE RESPONSE HAPPENED!

[Bestest Goddess]: Your name is that which you choose for yourself. Seek not the advice of a cookie.

[Chosen Puppy]: …

[Bestest Goddess]: Fiiine. Tap your name and think about it. It’ll update.

Ann reached up and pressed a fingertip against the air.

[Waheela’s Good Girl]: HEY WHAT THE FUCK!

It wasn’t me!

[Annita Kronforst]: You done?

[Bestest Goddess]: LOL For now. I couldn’t resist. Alright, time to go monitor the entire world fucking for another few days. Talk to you later! Oh, and deal with your libido. It’s high again.

Ann closed the chat window with a wave of her hand.

“Did she actually respond this time?” Rosalyn asked, handing Ann a steaming sausage and a piece of bread.

The meat was juicy, and her sharp teeth broke into the savoury dinner easily. Juice ran down Ann’s chin as she ate. “Yup. Says she’ll be by to talk before we get into the mountain. Also knows how to troll, so that’s fun.”

Rosalyn cocked her head. “Troll? Like, what, be big and lumbering?”

Right, internet slang. “No, no, it’s more like she’s doing things wrong just to get a reaction. Like when we tease Kat about being a princess.”

“She does have a built-in tiara now,” Rosalyn giggled. “Think she’s gonna have a crown when the horns come in?”

“Oh my Gods,” Ann gasped. “If she does get horns, I really hope it is. So many jokes. I neeeed it!”

“Yeah? Well…” Kat floundered for a moment in the face of the teasing. “What if you got horns?”

“Well, I could probably get rid of them if I wanted, and it’d be horrific looking having them pop out of my head, but then you’d just call me your horny mutt all the time.” Ann laughed. She couldn’t lean on Kat with Minnie there, but stuck her tongue out all the same.

“Feck that’s… Ok, I want it too.”

Ann crawled back on the rock, then over and up Kat’s back, draping herself over her shoulder. Her lips grazed the long ear for just a moment. “My horny princess.”

Kat let out a plaintive whine Ann hadn’t heard in a while. She did have to deal with her nearing limit. She felt herself start to drool. Throwing caution to the wind, she stuck out her tongue and took a long lick up the full length of Kat’s ear. The moan she drew from her was musical in its desperation.

Ann locked eyes with Minnie over Kat’s head. The woman hastily averted her gaze, but her dark cheeks were flushed, and not from the cold or the fire.

“Later, princess,” Ann purred, then pulled back and crawled back to her own seat.

“That was mean.” Rosalyn swatted her shoulder.

The fire popped and crackled quietly as they chatted. It was the release they all needed after the long day of fighting. Ann briefly realised that they could actually fight all day. That would be insane for anyone before her coma. Hell, fighting for an hour was something even most boxers rarely did. If there was some big battle, you’d hole up and find some way to take a breather while you recovered.

“Oh, that was a good few years ago. I was on an expedition he tagged along on.” Minnie was telling them how she’d met Tarvis. “Gods, I thought he was the coldest bastard in the world for a while, and just didn’t talk to anyone. Felt like a damn fool when I learned he was mute.”

“How did you learn all of the sign language?” Bren asked.

Minnie laughed, her husky voice carrying over the snowy plain. “Slowly! Gods as my witness, I think it took over a year to get conversational. I’m still learning some words. Conceptual things, like how you imagine a piece, or describing something, have to be really literal. Drawing helps out with that, but it can only go so far. He writes when he can, but that’s not always around.”

“Wait,” Ann interrupted. “Can’t he just use his arm or something with charcoal? That’d be perfectly fine.”

“I mean, yeah, but would you like walking around with smudges of charcoal all over your arms? He still feels dirty, so that’s only in urgent circ-”

The blast of a horn interrupted Minnie, shattering the quiet of the night. Ann’s ears flattened against the sound as the low note droned onward until it ended with an upward lilt.

“The fuck was that?” Ann asked. Her instincts were screaming that something was attacking, but she couldn’t see any movement.

“That,” Minnie sighed, “Would be the Mulsfar we’re going to meet. Sounds like they’re dealing with their own Warped. That was a warhorn.”

“Should… should we be going to help?”

“Nah, sit down and rest,” Minnie waved. “They should be fine, but that’s an alarm. Might just be some roaming creatures getting too close. It happens.”

Ann sat down. She hadn’t even realised she’d stood. “Can the town hear that? Also, what the fuck threatens something that big?”

Minnie nodded. “The town can, for sure. Usually, they take it as a sign to be on watch, but with the thing in the woods, that’s already the case.”

“As to the things that can threaten them, well, let’s just say things are big in the north. Very big,” Rosalyn said. Ann didn’t like that excited look.

“Avoid. Too big. Too much. Travel quiet. No fight.”

“But Lucia!” Rosalyn groaned. “I wanna dissect some of them! Can you imagine a fresh Sildramoth corpse? I could learn so much if one’s been Warped! Also, get to crawl around in its guts to figure out stuff, which is so gross! Wonder what their blood tastes like. Or their flesh. We gotta cook some of it! Compare raw to cooked. Maybe seasoning? I wonder if Cook would like it. Eldest sure could eat it.”

Ann felt the urge to stop Rosalyn before she gave away too much, but the names themselves and how she’d used them were ambiguous enough. There was that tasting thing again, though.

“Your elder is a fan of meat?” Minnie asked.

Ann jumped in before Rosalyn could start rambling. “Yeah! He was a hunter back in his heyday and still likes to participate in the celebration parts.”

“Better than our local Lord,” Minnie scoffed. “Bitch is a prideful sort. Rich, and takes more taxation than she should. Should see her carriage when she visits. Thing practically glitters. Acts like she owns the place. I mean, she does, but still, it’s so shitty.”

“Note tae self, investigation o’ Lady Southwall,” Kat grumbled.

Minnie shrugged. “Above my station. Have fun with that, princess. Anyway, the elders are varied. Or I guess the people in charge are. Never had much of a gripe with the Farraghers except for Southwall.”

“Family lines’re a bitch,” Kat agreed.

“Yet some form the foundation of our nation. Krisnaal’s family, for example.”

“Krisnaal? Laytons?” Minnie asked. “It was their expedition, actually! Didn’t know you knew their… what, matriarch?”

“Kris is a friend o’ me sister’s,” Kat explained. “I don’t know ‘er that well.”

“Friend,” Ann coughed.

“Aye, until Junia gets ‘er head attached to ‘er heart.”

Bren choked on his drink. “That is not likely. She is a wonderful woman, but her knowledge of others’ feelings is… lacking, to say the least. At times, I wonder if it will take a risk on Krisnaal’s side to spur her to action.”

“Is the whole capital as, um, gay as you’re all making it?” Minnie looked nervous.

Kat and Bren exchanged a look, then burst out laughing. “Hardly. Kat’s family just has a strange track record with its women. I wonder if Somnal would prefer men if he did not prefer books more.”

“We’ve got hundreds o’ years. No rush.”

“Wild to think that, right?” Minnie asked Rosalyn. “We’ve just got like a hundred before we kick the bucket.”

“Yeah! I always think about how much more I could do if I could live that long. It’s insane. I can’t even think about time from that reference. Kat’s already over forty, and she’s still young! That’s crazy! That’s almost double me! Wait, Kat, how old again?”

“Forty-six, so actually double ye.”

“Guess I’ve got a thing for older women,” Rosalyn shrugged, winking at Ann.

Ann dragged the druid into a hug. It was a nice evening. Bren and Lucia were leaning on each other, quietly talking. Ann wondered how much they chose to say out loud, or why they even bothered. Still, her heart clenched when she saw Bren start to stroke and preen Lucia’s feathers. It was a ridiculously cute gesture.

She felt obligated to try with Kat, but the woman’s scales required far less maintenance. Ann would just be picking at them.

After a nice round of Bren’s tea, everyone said goodnight and shuffled off to their tents.

The mood was nice and mellow, but Ann’s heart began to pound as she entered the tent. Shirts, pants and underwear were tossed aside with little care. She looked down hungrily at the two women, their faces flush with lust as they looked up at her.

Even as Kat pulled Rosalyn into a kiss, Ann couldn’t help but think how lucky she was.