Rise

There was a belief, a bit of conventional wisdom, a line of thought among long-time fans of the competitive scene for League of Legends. It was simple. Europe beats Korea! North America beats Europe! Korea beats North America! Exactly like Rock-Paper-Scissors. This was the ‘rule’ created by truly small brain analysis that occasionally held true but also had a million and one exceptions. The idiot logic was built up after watching what seemed like a recurring pattern over the years. The European teams managed to do well against the Korean teams, most of the time. Then the North American teams managed to do well against the European teams, most of the time. Finally, the Korean teams dominated the North American teams, most of the time.

Why this pattern sprang into existence and managed to hold true most of the time, no one could really say. The best theory was that it was from the difference in regional playerbases. The European teams played against each other, and played in a way that tripped up the Koreans. Same thing for the North American teams against the European teams. But at the very end, the Koreans always managed to dominate. But again, there were a million and one exceptions to this sort of thing. Not that most of the fans watching competitive LoL cared about that nuance. For them, the 80 IQ EU > KR; NA > EU; KR > NA equation was enough. Truthfully, the mental gymnastics required for that algorithm might’ve taxed the mental acuity of 40% of the fanbase.

For the upcoming semi-finals matchup between Legend and Season in the World Championships, this small brain analysis was enough for most fans to confidently and assuredly state that Season held the upper hand. Because LoL Rock-Paper-Scissors-ROFL-LMAO-LOL logic was irrefutable. Of course, there were also those who took simplicity to another level. An almost -200 IQ level. Including a certain dude-bro in Senior Class 7 whose blood and mouth ran far faster than his brain.

“ListenListenListen! Forget about League Rock-Paper-Scissors! All you need to know, my brother, is that Autumn is the second ranked Emperor. Phoenix is the third ranked Emperor! Do I need to make this any clearer? Number 2 is better than Number 3! You smelling the smarts here? Autumn is one rank higher, so Season is going to win this semi-finals matchup! It's going to be as smooth as I am with the ladies,” Ouyang declared.

Yang Fang turned around in his seat and stared at Ouyang over his horn-rimmed spectacles. Then he shook his head. “Ouyang. There are several things wrong with everything you just said. Let’s start with the first one. I’m not an expert on the subject per se, but based on observations you are not smooth with women. Now that we’re done with that, let’s talk about the rest of this. Do you really think the analysis and predictions for a game between two of the top teams in the world with some of the best players is as simple as that? Do you really think it’s as simple as some arbitrary ranking that states that the second best player in the world has an edge over the third best player in the world, so Season is going to win? If it were that simple, there would be no esports, no World Championships, none of this. The only logical conclusion here is that you’re just as bad with predictions as you are with women.”

Ouyang progressively frowned and grimaced as Yang Fang talked. Then he glared at Yang Fang for a long minute. “Oh? Oh! Well, ya know what? How about you spin up that egghead and try? Come on, fog up those glasses. Have a brain blast! Riddle me what you got. Show me how streets ahead you are! I’d like to see you try. Even the professional analysts and strategists at Worlds can’t predict who’ll win! Everyone gets it, Yang Fan. Legend and Season are among the foremost teams in the world. There’s a lot of things to think about. But getting bogged down in the deets, what’s the point? Think about it! There’s always a trap, and worrying about the trap is pointless. You say trap and I say no, you say tomato and I’ll say potato. We’ll never get an answer until someone checks under the hood. Ain’t no point in thinking. Or overthinking. Might as well go full small brain genius. Because when everyone else thinks smart, you might as well think dumb! Ain’t nothing wrong with being 40 IQ when everyone else is just guessing anyway. I got just as much a chance of being right as anyone else.”

“This… what? Traps? Hood? Potat...” Yang Fan wanted to say something, wanted to argue back. But the words died in his mind before they got to his tongue. He was speechless. Ouyang had become… Nicholas Cage! So random and pointless that he transcended conventional standards and thought to create a new point that no one ever really thought of. The biggest shock of all was that Ouyang’s words made complete sense. Did Ouyang independently arrive at Occam’s Razor… in reference to League of Legends?!

Lin Feng had been watching the exchange quietly from his seat the whole time. But Ouyang’s moment of insane clarity and Yang Fang’s reaction to it was too much for him to handle. He broke down laughing and gave Ouyang a thumbs up. “Ouyang’s right. Nothing wrong with keeping things simple. I don’t blame him. Both teams are really strong, so it’s hard to predict who’ll come out at top. There really is no point in overcomplicating things!”

Ouyang jumped out of his chair and fell to his knees, arms raised to the sky in supplication, once he heard Lin Feng say he was right. Then he cried out, “YES! PRAISE THE TRUE SAVIOR VAN WILDER! In! Yo! Face! Yang Fan! I thought your faith was strong but you needed proof. Well here it is! Even Bro Feng over there agrees with me! Only the truest of bros can see the genius in other bros!” Then he sat back down with a smug smile on his face, basking in the moment where he’d one-upped Yang Fan.