Surviving a Harsh Fantasy with Cheat Items (WN)

Two days had passed since the fierce battle, and the armies of the various nations had begun to return to their homelands, leaving the city of Lisbon in the Kingdom of Castilia.

With the birth of Kaara’s child and other matters, we had extended our stay by a day, but now the time had come for us to return to the capital.

Our soldiers were returning to the various cities of the Silesie Kingdom by land and sea, but we, fortunately, had the means to teleport back to the capital ahead of them.

「Good thing the ship’s magic circle is still functional.」

The ship itself was quite damaged and wouldn’t be leaving the harbor anytime soon, but the magic circle drawn on the deck was still usable.

「Alright, here we go.」

After being completely exhausted from childbirth for a day, Kaara had fully regained her strength and magic, ready to cast the teleportation spell. I had wanted to bring the knights along as well, but with such a large number, that wasn’t feasible.

This time, it was just the slave girl squad, Rara-chan, and for some reason, even Sarah-chan had tagged along, making it a tight fit. Of course, Louise was with us, but Clementine and the others who insisted on coming as guards had to wait until the next day.

「Ah, it’s nice to be home.」

We stepped out of the teleportation circle into the royal gardens of the capital. 「Ah, it’s nice to be home!」

Startled, I turned around, and there stood tentacle oneesan, mimicking my voice perfectly.

「That’s creepy!」

I quickly backed away as tentacle oneesan slithered closer. But this wasn’t just any tentacle oneesan—she was the manifestation of the Mother of Chaos.

Regardless, why on earth did she teleport with us back to the capital? Everyone else reacted with small gasps, retreating from the Mother of Chaos as well.

I thought she had disappeared, but apparently, she’d hitched a ride on our teleportation spell and ended up right in the royal garden. What business does she have here?

「Nation’s Father, what should we do?」

Kaara asked, clearly anxious.

There was no way to teleport her back since Kaara had exhausted her mana. We couldn’t just leave her wandering around the garden either.

「Alright, Ria, come here for a second.」

「What is it, Takeru? You’re making such a scary face…」

Speaking of which, I still owed her some discipline for her previous behavior.

「You’re responsible for looking after the Mother of Chaos.」

「What?! No way! Why me desu yo? I’m a pious saintess! Why should I take care of the Demon Goddess? Isn’t that the demons’ job?」

She glanced over at Oracle and the others, but they all averted their eyes.

Even though she was a deity they revered, it seemed that the Mother of Chaos terrified them as well.

「Mother of Chaos, Ria will be your caretaker.」

The Mother of Chaos smiled brightly in response.

「Thank you, I’ll be in your care.」

She actually responded!

Ever since becoming the Mother of Chaos, tentacle oneesan had become more expressive, almost human-like in her reactions.

「Eek! Please stop!」

Ria squealed as the Mother of Chaos wrapped a tentacle around her leg, seemingly fond of her new caretaker.

「Alright, just isolate Ria and the Goddess in an empty room, and everything should be fine.」

「Wait, Takeru! I can’t handle this role! Help me!」

I don’t want to by all means.

She had her fun teasing me and terrifying the child pope Anastasia, so now it was her turn to suffer a bit.

I grabbed Ria and tossed her into an empty room in the castle, with the tentacle goddess slithering in after her.

「Eeeeeek!」

Came a distant scream as I closed the door and sealed it shut.

No real danger—just a bit of harmless tentacle prodding, after all. I suspect the Mother of Chaos’ tentacle fascination stems from intellectual curiosity about new things.

For a while, it seemed that the Mother of Chaos would be satisfied simply by studying Ria.

And so, all was well.

※※※

When we returned, the maids in the inner palace quickly rushed to inform the royal castle of our arrival.

First, I decided to visit Silhouette, who had been watching over everything in our absence.

「Takeru-sama, welcome home!」

Silhouette, who was in the audience chamber busy with her official duties, rushed over to me with tears welling up in her blue eyes. She immediately threw herself into my arms.

「Whoa… I’m back. Thank you for taking care of things while I was away.」

「I’m so glad you’re safe. That’s all that matters.」

She said, her slender arms wrapping around my neck with surprising strength, conveying the depth of her emotions.

「Yeah, sorry for making you worry. It’s all over now.」

Seeing her face, I felt myself relax completely.

Behind her, Prime Minister Nicola stepped forward and spoke.

「Your Majesty, you may consider today’s duties concluded. Please take this opportunity to spend time with your family.」

「Thank you. I’ll do just that.」

「I’ve already sent word to the city. The return of the King General who saved the world is a cause for celebration for all of us. For a while, the capital will be caught up in the festivities, and I imagine work will come to a halt.」

The Prime Minister said, stroking his white beard with a smile.

「You did well too, Lyle….」

He added, addressing his own child, Lyle-sensei.

It was rare for the Prime Minister to offer praise.

「It’s good to see you in good health, Prime Minister.」

「Well, I’m the only one left who can assist Her Majesty. The Silesie Kingdom lost many of its high-ranking officials during the war. Now, I’m the only one with knowledge of the old customs and practices of the court.」

「Now that the war is over, I suppose it’s time to turn those old customs into things of the past. I’ll see to it that you can retire comfortably soon.」

「Ha ha, we’ll see. I’ll keep my expectations in check for now.」

Their banter was free from the sharpness it once held. Perhaps the distance between Lyle-sensei and his father had lessened a bit since Lyle-sensei had a child. Watching them, I couldn’t help but think so.

「That reminds me, we should hold a celebration for Takeru-sama’s return!」

「I appreciate that, but…」

I was eager to see my children first. Before that, I’d like to rest for a bit in the back room.

※※※

When I entered the children’s room, I was greeted with a surprisingly formal welcome.

「Father, congratulations on your safe return.」

「Uh, thanks. You’re’s… Coil, right?」

The little boy, with brown hair and a beret on his head, held a thick book under his arm. This was Coil, Lyle-sensei’s child. Beside him, Oracle’s son, Orakeru, also said, ‘Welcome home.’

Last time I saw them, they were still struggling with their speech, but now they were speaking fluently. These two were only one-year-old toddlers, after all.

This wasn’t just a case of fast growth—this was far beyond that. Orakeru, my eldest, had a sharp and composed face, which was remarkable for a one-year-old (most kids that age can barely walk), but still within a believable range of early development.

Coil, however, was another story entirely. His intellectual development was clearly abnormal.

「Coil, let me ask you something… You wouldn’t happen to have been Japanese in a previous life, would you?」

「I’m not sure what you mean, Father. Your words are still a bit difficult for me to grasp.」

Coil replied clearly.

See, that’s exactly the problem—his response was far too sharp for a one-year-old.

For now, I’ll just put the reincarnation theory on hold.

「Father, will you play with me?」

「Of course.」

I said, picking him up and lifting him onto my shoulders, making him laugh with delight.

Good, he’s still acting like a normal child.

「Father, could you help me with this part of the book? I’m having trouble understanding it.」

Coil said, opening the book he was holding.

I looked at it. Yep, that’s a magic tome. And a high-level one, at that…

I could read the contents of the book thanks to the language cheat, but understanding it was a different story.

「I can’t use magic, so you’d better ask Kaara about that. She’s in the courtyard right now, doing maintenance on the teleportation magic circle.」

「Understood. I’ll do that.」

Coil said and dashed off.

As cute as his actions were, Coil had already reached a level where I could no longer keep up with him. Well, if it’s about magic, Kaara can handle it.

Just as I continued playing with the other children, a sweet voice rang out from the courtyard, ‘Meteor Strike!’ followed by a loud rumble shaking the ground.

Hey, Kaara! Don’t go teaching a one-year-old Meteor Strike! I rushed to the courtyard with Orakeru still perched on my shoulders. Fortunately, being a spell cast by a one-year-old, the courtyard wasn’t completely destroyed.

But there was a massive rock embedded in the ground. A one-year-old and already capable of this? The kid had terrifying magical talent. Should I be impressed or scold him?

While I was contemplating, Sharon came storming over, furious. ‘What on earth are you two doing?!’

Right, scolding it is—destroying the courtyard calls for a proper reprimand. I needed to build a magic training ground before the yard became full of craters.

「Father, what’s wrong?」

「I’m just realizing that at one year old, I can’t keep up with you two.」

Despite the sight of a giant rock that had rained down into the courtyard, Orakeru remained unfazed. This kid’s got potential too.

「Hmm. I don’t really understand what Coil’s talking about either, but I understand even less when my younger siblings talk, so it’s boring.」

Yeah, the others were normal infants, still speaking in baby talk. Orakeru, the eldest, had it tough being caught in the middle like this. He was likely in for a challenging future, but as the older brother, I hoped he’d look out for his siblings.

Suddenly, a pleasant smell filled the air.

「Smells good. Want to go check it out, Orakeru?」

「Yeah.」

It was coming from the kitchen. Right, they mentioned preparing a feast earlier.

「Oh! Master, you’re here!」

Colette, the head chef, greeted me, along with everyone else who was working in harmony to prepare the meal. Silhouette was there too.

「It’s a privilege to have the queen herself preparing a meal.」

「Yes, I wanted to make something delicious for you, Takeru-sama.」

Silhouette replied, stuffing minced meat into dough she had rolled out.

「Wait, are those… dumplings?」

「Yes, we have plenty of flour and meat, so we decided to try making dumplings based on what you told us, Master.」

A pot on the stove was bubbling with vegetable soup. It seemed they were making boiled dumplings instead of pan-fried ones.

「I want to help too!」

Orakeru said from my shoulders. It did look fun, so why not let him try?

「Alright, let’s give it a shot too.」

「Ugh…」

Orakeru struggled to mimic what the others were doing, trying to fold the dough around the meat. Of course, it didn’t turn out well on his first attempt, but it would have been more concerning if a one-year-old had mastered it so quickly.

「Orakeru, you’re trying to put too much meat in. Try using less.」

「…I did it!」

After several tries, Orakeru managed to make a tiny dumpling, and he was thrilled with the result.

「Let’s eat them together later.」

「Yeah!」

We also made some udon, boiled and served with meat. It wasn’t a particularly elaborate meal, but simple dishes were best when cooking with kids. The whole experience made me reflect on how surreal it was to be cooking with my son.

After we enjoyed the dumplings and meat udon, Silhouette, who had been preparing a cake to celebrate our victory, brought it out, adding a sweet end to a joyful dinner.

※※※

The next morning, at dawn.

「Huh…」

I caught sight of the Mother of Chaos slithering and curling around the meteorite that Coil had summoned, which had now turned into a bizarre piece of art. At the same time, I suddenly remembered—I’d completely neglected Ria for an entire day.

Panic set in, and I rushed to the room where I had locked up both Ria and the Mother of Chaos.

…She’s dead!

「Ria!」

Ria lay there, completely transformed, but thankfully, she still had a pulse—she wasn’t dead, just unconscious, eyes rolled back. I won’t go into the messy details, but it was a sorry sight. She was a sticky, goopy mess.

「Hey, snap out of it!」

But it was no use; she was completely unresponsive. No surprise, considering she’d been in this state for a full day. I quickly hoisted her up, carrying her to the bath to clean her up.

「Ugh, the pink vortex…」

As I laid her down in the changing room, Ria weakly opened her eyes and groaned in pain.

「You’re awake?」

「Where am I? Have I been called to Asama’s side?」

「You’re still alive.」

「Ugh…my body senses are too sensitive right now. Please be gentle…」

「I’m sorry. I just wanted to clean you up. I intended to punish you, but leaving you like that all day was my fault.」

「Now you’re saying that! That was awful. But I see you have no hesitation in undressing me now.」

「Well, we’re beyond that, aren’t we?」

「Takeru, why don’t we just bathe together? That way, we’ll be clean faster, instead of just wiping me down.」

「That’s a good idea, but it’s still early. Wait here. Let me check if the bath’s ready.」

Our household had grown quite large, and the baths were in frequent use. Sometimes, even this early, the water was still warm. Hoping that was the case, I opened the door to the bath.

「It’s ready!」

The Mother of Chaos was already in there. How did she get in? I’d just seen her in the courtyard!

I carefully closed the door and backed away slowly.

「Ria, the bath’s no good. Let’s just wipe you down with hot water…」

「T-Takeru… the pink vortex is coming!」

「What are you talking about?」

I turned around, only to see tentacles slipping through the crack of the closed door, reaching toward us. Before we could react, the tentacles wrapped around both our legs.

There was no escape. Once again, I found myself caught by these cursed tentacles. Seriously, again?

「I had a feeling this would happen.」

「If I’m with you, Takeru, I can endure it. There’s no point in fighting it anymore!」

Wait, Ria was okay with this? Had she already developed resistance to the tentacles?

I, on the other hand, was not sure I could handle this, and I really didn’t want to be dragged into this again. From the bathroom, a voice that sounded eerily like Ria’s called out, ‘Why don’t we bathe together?’

The Mother of Chaos had mimicked Ria’s voice perfectly. What sort of strange hobby had she picked up?

Was the Mother of Chaos starting to mimic everything she observed? Sure enough, we were soon pulled into the bath by the tentacles.

「Huh, there’s no slimy stuff this time?」

「Ahhh… I thought this was going to be terrible, but it’s actually a really nice bath. Feels like I’ve come back to life.」

For some reason, the tentacles didn’t bring their usual slimy discomfort. Instead, the Mother of Chaos just seemed to be enjoying a normal soak in the bath.

It seemed that once submerged in water, the slime dissolved, and the tentacles became much calmer. As I watched the Mother of Chaos relax and mimic Ria’s voice again, exclaiming ‘I’ve come back to life~’ with a content sigh, I realized I might have stumbled upon a way to handle her.

The Mother of Chaos was uncontrollable by anyone, but at least if she was going to stick around, I’d need to find a way to neutralize those tentacles. For now, the bath seemed to be working.