Chapter 740 – Celebration Time
The Empire’s handling of magic is extremely loose for how powerful mages are. It goes completely against the White Pantheon idea that mages should be controlled and kept on watch so that they cannot threaten the status quo. The Imperial Colleges of Magic, on the other hand, are given autonomy almost unmatched as long as their magicians are trained to a basic level of employability. They are free to choose their own curriculum, their own entrance exams, their own teaching methods. Each school is radically different from the next.
All Imperial Colleges of Magic need to train their pupils in magical construction-engineering. The largest cohort of graduates goes to serve in the construction sector. After that, the Imperial Military takes its share of recruits, both volunteers and constructs. After that, other jobs are found for magicians, typically in the sciences or in archaeology, as weather specialists or agricultural support workers. The Imperial Bureaus and Departments do not recruit magicians for civilian roles and set the standard for the rest of the Empire.
Whereas a magician can easily find a job in the Empire, there is little employment which mixes the mundane and the magically-gifted. Instead, roles are dominated by one or the other, with theatre being one of the institutions were the mix is achieved. All mages that fail to find a job are automatically enrolled to serve as magical researchers in the college of their training, although these roles are purposefully designed to pay on a per-success basis. Supposedly, in theory, one could get rich off the career. In practice, that can only be achieved by the most genius of magicians. A skilled mage has no need to enter into research, since the Bureau of Magic pays out bonuses regardless of whether one has a formal title of researcher or not. The automatic enrolment is to make some benefit of a magician after the person has been trained, although the system is designed in the fashion it is to force them into the greater Imperial economy rather than the enclosures which are the Colleges.
Of course, no review of Imperial can be made without mention of Arcadia. Arcadia’s return to War-College and the shedding of the Grand Arcadia identity has done exactly what the White Pantheon predicted it would. Elassa still serves as the headmistress of the elite institution, although she is actually able to leave her school nowadays. Arcadia pilfers top students from the other colleges, although the amount is not great whatsoever. The school itself barely breaches five hundred students in total.
Arcadia is one of the few places in the Empire were only the non-negotiable of Imperial laws apply. The SIS is barred from operating within its borders, there is no tithe imposed upon the quasi-state and Elassa, at least within the borders of the institution, has the powers of every Imperial Bureau combined. The school has been mage into a tiny kingdom of magic.
- Excerpt from “Imperial Bureaucracy Review: Second Edition”, written by Goddess Maisara, of Order.
“This is some drink.” Helenna once had to listen to Malam give yet another of her reviews of yet another vodka: Totalut this time. “Smooth but it burns, the taste is good, there’s this consistency in it.” Malam took another swig. “It’s not sticky, but it feels like it should be. It doesn’t splash in my mouth is what I’m saying.” Helenna sipped her wine glass. Excellent, she was not even being facetious when she admitted to herself that she would rather listen to Malam talk about the bottle of drink rather than keep on making her crude and stupid jokes. This, at the very least, was bearable.
Malam slapped her lips together and stomped with her bare feet on the carpet. Helenna was wrapped in a blanket, Malam wore nothing save for a white-button up shirt. “Better or worse than Hanoff?” Helenna asked.
“Oh better by far.” Malam replied. “It’s not even a competition. That is some shit, this…” She made a sour face. “The burn is strong and it sticks with you.”
“You’re supposed to chase it.”
“I’m not a child though.” Malam answered and Helenna sighed. What else could she expect frankly? No. Malam was not a child, and Malam did not chase her drinks. “I like the burn, it’s strong.” She took another swig. Helenna sipped her glass of Rancais Purple wine and then set it down on the coffee table. The pair of Goddesses had both had enough of the Donut at this point. A change of scenery was needed.
A change of scenery and a shower, that latter was important. The Donut lacked such facilities, that had been Helenna’s mistake. The men had showers, she did not. Unfortunately, she could not live at the Donut permanently and bask in the glory of that massive statue of herself constantly. So, after it became undeniable that Helenna needed to finally bathe herself, the two had gone to the closest Divine hotel. And Malam, as always, had stocked herself up on drink.
A set of empty bottles already stood arranged in a line on the central island in the kitchen. The lights had been dimmed and the pair of Goddesses were celebrating. One, for Helenna’s IBI having wiretapped enough succubi as to reveal Belili’s location, two, for the Donut being completed, three, for the Imperial Bureau of Information, four, for the Special Imperial Service, five, for Malam, six, for Helenna, seven, for having made it to this day, eight, for being good friends, nine, for Helenna having grown some backbone and ten, celebrating for the sake of celebration, because there was no enough good news happening in the world at large.
There should be fireworks in the night sky through the balcony. There should be fireworks for no other reason than the fact that Helenna wanted there to be fireworks. Alas, she could not conjure the entertainment, so through the massive set of double glass doors that led to the balcony. Through them, the night sky was lit up by the mass of lights on the ground. “Are you going to go to the Imperianna?” Helenna asked.
“Of course I am.” Malam said. “How could I not? You are too, right?”
“Well now I am.” If Malam was going, then Helenna would go. She would probably have to attend anyway, because it was a cultural festival and the Goddess of Love could not miss cultural festivals, but at least now she knew that she would enjoy herself. “I’m going to destroy them.”
“No you’re not.”
“Obviously, not literally.” Malam said. “But I’ll show them how a dress is done.”
“No you’re not.” Helenna said. “Me and you will choose something similar and matching, and we’re not part of the competition. We’ll win, you’ll win at least, by virtue of being Arascus’ daughter. That’s not going to happen. It’s Paida’s festival, let her enjoy herself.” Paida enjoying herself was just part of the goal, they could not outshine the Epan Nationals this time around because this was the first year and the Imperianna was supposed to be a celebration of the Empire as a whole, and not of Arascus’ family.
“Wow.” Malam said. “What a spoilsport you are.”
“It’s going to be good anyway.” Helenna said. “We can invite others too, but the competition is for the nationals and those that actually rule land.”
“What about Fortia and Maisara then?”
“They don’t rule land.”
“They do.”
Helenna rolled her eyes, her hair changed into the shade of an annoyed purple. Malam was correct, but it was only on a technicality. Yes, both Goddesses had Holy Orders and those Holy Orders had their own personal holdings. That did not mean they were the same thing as Paida commanding Rancais for example. Or Olonia in Lubska. “We both know what I meant.” Helenna would not play this game. Now, she had figured out how to deal with Malam.
“Well if you say so-“ Malam trailed off, turning towards the balcony doors. Helenna followed Malam’s gaze and then narrowed her eyes in confusion. If she was younger, she probably would have jumped but that instinct had long since been pushed out of her.
Elassa, of all fucking people, was stood there. Elassa. That Elassa. The Elassa. The Goddess of Magic. The headmistress of the Empire’s most elite war-college. “Shouldn’t she be in Arcadia?” Helenna asked and wrapped the blanket tighter around herself.
“I think she should.” Malam said. She waved to the Goddess of Magic. Elassa shook her head, made a horrid sour face, then pointed towards the lock. “Well that’s Elassa alright.”
“That’s Elassa.” Helenna said. She made no attempt to even sit up, instead just miming opening the door with her hand. “Are you going to help her?”
“No.” Malam said, she took a swig of her vodka. “This one burns good.” Helenna sipped her wine and Elassa, from outside, threw her arms up into the air. Each of her fingers bore a ring with a fat white gemstone, her dress was filled with the crystals stitched into it, even Elassa’s earrings had the diamonds which had been taken from the transmuted ash. The Goddess of Magic flashed with light for a moment, the door opened by itself and slid to the side.
“Couldn’t you have opened it for me?” That shrill, high-pitched voice was one thing that Helenna had enough of in the White Pantheon. If she wasn’t made to listen to Elassa speak for the next hundred years, then it would be a good hundred years.
“You have magic.” Helenna said dryly. “Just open it.”
“Excuse me for being polite.” Elassa said, her fists landed on her hips. “Maybe you wanted me to bring you food too?”
“Oh that would be grand.” Malam said. “Can you? And keep it warm with some pyromancy too.”
“No.” Elassa said. “No I cannot.”
“Well I assume you want our help.” Malam said. “And you know what goes great with vodka? Those Ihon raw fish things. On rice. That would be grand.” Malam patted her belly and licked her lips and Helenna’s hair suddenly turned a surprised yellow. Could Malam actually make her stomach rumble on command? No way. That was impossible.
“I have a job of my own. You can order food if you’re too lazy to get it yourself.” As enjoyable as it would be to watch Malam and Elassa pester each other all night, it would be even more enjoyable to not have to listen to Of Magic’s nails-on-a-chalkboard voice.
“How did you even find us?” Helenna asked.
“I asked around.” Elassa said dryly. “Besides, you two aren’t exactly secretive.” Of Magic extended an arm to the bottles. “Maybe if you didn’t try to buy out a whole store from drink, you wouldn’t have ended up on the local news.” Helenna sighed, then turned to Malam. Of Hatred did not even have the decency to pretend to be abashed about her alcoholism. Instead the woman waved her white hair with a hand and spread her arms out.
“I’m the Goddess of Hatred Elassa, what do you expect from me? I have to drink.”
“I’m not judging.” Elassa said. “I’ve come here with a job.” Oh. Helenna saw her hair go into a depressed grey. Of course that was why Elassa had come here. What else would she be doing? Coming round to just say hi? Of course not. That was far too cultured for a magician.
“What’s the job?” Malam said. “We charge.”
Elassa took the bait. Her blue stared dryly at Malam. “You charge.” She declared it like a court declaring a sentence. “Since when exactly does the SIS and the IBI charge for assisting the Empire?”
“Since right now, specifically for you.” Malam said with a smirk. “And we’re expensive.”
“I’m not even going to humour you.” Elassa said, she opened her mouth to continue and Malam interrupted her.
“Elassa, I am a very busy woman. We’re celebrating right now because we’ve gotten a step closer to getting rid of the succubus menace. Whatever you have better be more important than all the succubi in Epa right now.”
Elassa didn’t even think or consider her response. “I need helping Saranael, besides, you two are always on this succubus show. This is quick and easy and you can get back to it.”
Malam was quick to answer. “I’m going to kill a demon princess.”
“Oh.” Elassa pursed her lips. That did sound like something she would be interested too as well. “Ahh…”
“I’m going to kill her alone.” Well, it had been worth a shot at the very least. “It’s my kill. I don’t want your help Elassa.” Malam crossed her arms. “In fact, I would be extremely unhappy if you decided I needed your help. I would be so unhappy in fact that you would suddenly be having problems on your hands.”
“I get it.” Elassa said. Helenna sipped her wine, if Malam wanted to prove she could kill a demon princess alone, let her do it frankly. Who was Elassa to try and stop her anyway? “You don’t need my help, I get it Malam.”
“Alright.” Malam said. “And you think whatever you have is more important than that?”
“Did you ignore me?” Elassa asked. “I already told you what I wanted.”
“I have a short memory.” Malam answered back quickly and Helenna smiled with pure contentment. Dealing with Malam was annoying, but seeing Malam deal with someone that wasn’t her was like watching a master at play. She all but had Elassa wrapped around her finger.
Elassa sighed with all the fatigue in the world and forced herself to repeat what she had said. “I need to find Saranael.” Of Magic looked at Malam, then Malam looked to Helenna and Elassa followed Malam’s shifting of her gaze. Helenna immediately answered with a loud moan that did not even pretend to be a word, instead just a sound of general disdain to the fact she was getting pulled into yet another plot.
OOwwWooooooWwoooooOoooOOOOOoooOAAA
“Hela… Ooohhhh Hela!” Malam cooed. “Looks like you’re wanted Hela!”
“Tomorrow.” Helenna said. “Tomorrow I’ll start, today we’re celebrating.” Finding Saranael, what a job Elassa had found. For what purpose even? What did she want to interact with the mad God of Knowledge for? The fool had thought himself into such a hole that he had lost his mind.
“Tomorrow?” Elassa asked dryly. “Why not today? Why not right now?”
“Ooooeeerrrgghhhh.” Helenna moaned. “Why? No. Tomorrow.”
“Today cannot be done Elassa.” Malam spoke up. Helenna thanked all the lights in the sky, all the things that watched over Divinity and this universe at large that Malam had taken her side. The last thing she wanted to do right now was to find Saranael. Not when they were celebrating like this.
“Why not today?” Elassa asked and smoothed her blue dress down.
“Today is night time.” Malam extended her arm to the window. “We do not work at night.” Elassa stared at Malam as if the woman had just said some incomprehensible spell.
The minute of silent stretched on, Elassa watched Helenna quietly take another sip from her wine glass. With Malam on her side, Of Love felt as if she could do anything. She rolled again on her couch, lying stomach down now. That was comfortable on her back. “I knew you two were lazy but this is ridiculous.” Elassa said.
“Mal.” Helenna said. “I am lazy.”
“I am too.” Malam said.
And again, Elassa said nothing, she just stared at the pair in a silent sort of fury. “Are you both serious? No. You can’t accept being lazy, I’m calling you lazy. Change it you layabouts.”
“I’m a layabout.” Malam said.
“Me too.” Helenna commented.
“Idiots, both of you.” Elassa shook her head. She lifted off into the air, the gemstones on her finger-rings were all glowing as she worked her magic in some fashion that Helenna had no experience with. Helenna rolled back around to her back, even her hair had gone in a lazy yellow-orange right now.
“We’re idiots.” Helenna was faster this time.
“I needed the reminder.” Malam agreed.
“I’ll want some news tomorrow. It’s important, I’m not joking you two.” Elassa turned around and walked out through the way she came. Each step an angry thump that would have made a click if the hotel room was not absolutely covered with carpets. And just like before, the massive glass double doors to the balcony shut themselves. Elassa and Malam both watched Elassa’s dress suddenly light up as the Goddess of Magic began to weave her flight.
Helenna looked to Malam.
Malam looked to Helenna.
Bright eyes met pitch black ones.
Of Love broke out into the laughter first and Of Hatred followed. Malam’s white hair waved like a curtain in the wind as Helenna’s became a joyous yellow. “We’re a dream team.” Malam said. “Did you see her face?”