Sporemageddon

“I’ll take two of each,” I said to the pharmacist. Or, I assumed that’s what he was. He certainly had the white coat of one on, though his coat was a little less white than some might have preferred.

“Two of each?” he asked. I’d only met the man a minute ago and I could tell that he wasn’t impressed with me yet.

“That’s right,” I said with a serious nod. “Boss said, two of each. He sent us cause we’re good at numbers.”

Bet glanced my way, but she was only confused for a moment before joining in and replying with a bit of a deeper gutter accent than usual. “That’s right.”

“And your boss is?” he asked, leading us on.

“Who the boss is don’t matter any,” I said. “He said two of each mushroom you got. At the prices you’ve got listed there, then we’re supposed to bribe you a pound. Right Marge?”

Bet blinked, then nodded quickly. “Right!”

The pharmacist perked up a little. Not so much at the demand, but at the naked bribe. A pound was a lot. Even someone working a higher-class job like him probably only made a pound or two a day, and that was if he was being paid pretty well. With the state this place was in, I doubted it.

“Let’s see that money first,” he said. “Your boss wouldn’t want to have sent cheats, right?”

I almost rolled my eyes, then decided better of it and did roll them. Very sarcastically too. “Fine,” I said. Money was flashed, and then the man moved over to the counter and started working to divvy things up.

“And quality stuff,” I said. “Boss can afford to bribe you that much means he can afford to send someone over with bats, you know what I mean?”

“Yes, yes, of course,” he said dismissively. It did look like he was being a bit generous with the dosages.

In the end, he had seven small baggies for me. Not as many as I’d like, but still not bad. A good amount. Bet did the math real quick, and we paid him in exact change, then I flicked a pound onto the top for him, gathered the goods, and was out of the store in a hurry.

“Back to the farm?” Bet asked.

“No. To one of the second sites,” I said. I led us over to this one space where I grew some mushrooms near to home. It was nestled within a burned-down shack that no one had rebuilt yet. The place was drafty and stank, but that was good as far as I was concerned. It kept even the desperate homeless out.

I laid the bags down, then giddy as a child on Christmas... Feroniemass? I opened the first of the bags.

What I found were two small glass vials, filled with a familiar blue lichen crawling up the inside. I sighed, then pushed some mana through, and the lichen lit up.

[Blur Glow Lichen] - Rare

A lichen found in several dungeons and which will glow when in the presence of mana. Often used by alchemists to create mana-activated potions or lights.

Yup. This was a rare find... in the Ditz dungeon. To be fair, the value of it had probably climbed a lot lately, with the dungeon’s loot being impossible to cultivate anymore. But it wasn’t too valuable to me. I had some samples already, and could cultivate more if I wanted it.

Determined not to waste any more time, I opened the next package, with Bet leaning over my shoulder to see.

This one was a mushroom as well, one that I wasn’t as familiar with. Short, with a fat cap, kind of heavy for the size. These were button mushrooms of some sort, but... I lifted and dropped the one I had. It was way too heavy for the size.

[Ironcap Toadstool] - Uncommon

Unauthorized duplication: this narrative has been taken without consent. Report sightings.

A squat mushroom with a dull grey cap that is almost metallic to the touch. Consuming it strengthens bones and teeth for a short time, though the taste is chalky and unpleasant.

Interesting. That might be a good mushroom to combine with some others. The taste didn’t matter if it had a magical, even a lightly magical, effect that improved healing in some way.

I set the mushroom back into its baggy, then looked into the next. I was getting excited. Some of these could lead to some great combinations moving forward.

[Lantern Gill] - Rare

A delicate mushroom whose frilled gills emit a steady golden light in darkness. Eaten raw, it sharpens eyesight. When dried and powdered, it is used in potions to dispel illusions.

Hmm, another eyesight improvement mushroom? Though this one wasn’t limited to night vision only. Again, another mushroom that had a magical effect. I wasn’t sure how useful dispelling illusions could be, but it was a tool, and I didn’t say no to added utility.

The next mushroom was familiar once more.

[Purple Capped Night Watcher] - Rare

This rare mushroom is only found in areas with a particular kind of predatory animal, notably creatures who stalk and prey on others using magical means in unlit environments. While very mildly poisonous, this mushroom allows those who eat it to see in the dark, amplifying natural night vision. Used in several alchemical concoctions.

Yeah, fair. Another Ditz mushroom. Was someone cultivating these? I’d done the Ritual of Sporemageddon in that dungeon a solid year and a bit ago. I knew for a fact that even dried out, these mushrooms didn’t last this long.

I was down to three.

Fortunately, the very next mushroom was exactly, or almost exactly, what I was looking for.

It was tall, with a thin fringe around its middle and a pretty veil below a narrow, pointy cap. The mushroom was an off-white, with a few spots. Nothing too special, really.

[Veil of Sighs] - Common

A tall, thin mushroom with a translucent veil beneath its cap. Crushing it releases spores that induce drowsiness in nearby creatures. Often used in sleeping draughts, though they can be mildly addictive.

Not perfect, but what was?

I chewed on my lip, turning it this way and that.

“What is it?” Bet asked.

“This might be what I’m looking for,” I said. “Its description says that it can be addictive. It makes you sleepy as well. Now... the thing is, things that make you sleep well can be chemically addictive, or they can be habit-forming. That’s two different kinds of addiction. I need one, not the other.”

“Hmm?” Bet asked. “Which kind do you need? And why do you want something addictive?”

“Because I have a very vile plan, Bet,” I said as I slid the mushroom away. I’d experiment on this one, extensively.

The next two weren’t as interesting for my project, but I didn’t mind them so much.

The first was strange and large and shaped oddly, neither sample were the same shape, though they had the same feel to them.

[Hollow Drumcap] - Common

A wide, hollow mushroom that echoes faintly when tapped. Harmless but inedible. Hunters use them to make simple whistles.

Weird. And common? Certainly not around here, or I’d have heard of them, but maybe they were common nearby? Or in some forests? There weren’t many of those around the city.

The next was a strange dull-reddish colour, and was shaped like an upsidedown coupe. The stem coming out of the side even looked like a handle, from the right angle.

[Widow’s Cup] - Uncommon

A vivid red, cup-shaped mushroom that grows best where blood has spilled. Its spores are poisonous if inhaled, but properly brewed, the fungus is a potent coagulant used to stop bleeding.

Interesting. Another poison for the arsenal. Judging by the rest of the text, this one might kill by messing with the bloodstream? That was a whole new vector of attack for me. Most of my poisons targeted the lungs more directly or had hallucinogenic and neurotoxic properties.

I carefully replaced that one and sealed it up. I’d be fine if I got a dusting of it, probably. My [Basic Poison Resistance {Common}] and [Poison Blooded {Rare}] would both kick in to help me, and I was used to taking micro-doses and could suffer through the effects well enough. I wasn’t so sure about Bet, though.

“Now what?” Bet asked.

“Now it’s business as usual,” I said. “We work hard, earn lots of coin, and you focus on something new.”

“What’s that?”

“Finding people that might be willing to sell something for us. People that wouldn’t mind being the middleman, or selling directly. It doesn’t matter. We need to expand our network.”

Bet swallowed. “That sounds like a lot.”

“Don’t worry, it might be a while before I even have a product. We’re putting the cart ahead of the horse on this one.”

“That’s a weird expression.”

“Eh, it’s something I plucked out of a book somewhere,” I dismissed. “Come on! Let’s get back to the farm, I want to start experimenting already!”

***